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Source: 1990 Seattle International Convention – Unknown Speaker – UNIDAD Y SERVICIO – RS 17652.mp3 File: 1990-seattle-international-convention-unknown-speaker-unidad-y-servicio-rs-17652.mp3 Duration: 01:26:50
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Alcoholics Anonymous is a group of men and women who share their mutual experience, strength and hope to solve their common problem and help others recover from alcoholism. The only requirement to be a member of Alcoholics Anonymous is the desire to quit drinking. To be a member of Alcoholics Anonymous, you do not pay salaries or fees. We maintain ourselves with our own contributions. Alcoholics Anonymous is not affiliated with any religious sect, political party, organization or institution.
We do not wish to intervene in controversies. We do not support or oppose any cause. Our main objective is to remain sober and help other alcoholics reach the state of sobriety. Comrades, my name is Jorge and I am an alcoholic. In this session, this afternoon, we have a very special topic. And for this topic, we have comrade Armando, who is going to talk to us about unity and service. With you, comrade Armando.
Good afternoon. I am Armando. I am an alcoholic. Well, first of all, I want to thank God because we exist, because we celebrate today or these days, even if it is not the exact date, 55 years of this great miracle. 55 years that I believe, capitalized on experience and feeling, is a great teaching. There is so much to say about A, that I think time would always be insufficient, especially when people have certain deficiencies like me.
Some of them I have tried to overcome without succeeding, others I have overcome without proposing it. Miracles that happen here. But I believe that, after all, I am a human being, facing its existence, with an intention of renewal every day, to make its existence more livable or more pleasant. Bill, regarding this topic of unity, regarding service, it has enriched us, it has left us a huge inheritance, which, many times, the individual, perhaps, for not facing their own capacities, prefers to take refuge in their mediocrity and closes the books so as not to find out.
Not finding out is not compromising. Not compromising is not forcing me. And I believe that, in these times, for me, in Alcoholics Anonymous, at any time, it kills much more ignorance than alcohol. I am not drinking, and many of you are not either. However, I am not talking about that ignorance of not having gone to college or X school. I am talking about the ignorance of ignoring books, of ignoring what we have there.
I am talking about emotional ignorance, when an individual like me, despite reading, is not able to react emotionally. Of that ignorance. Bill, and those first alcoholics looked for all the means to motivate, to make a person like me react spiritually to an insensitive person like me, or to an immature emotional person. A man who managed, viscerally, throughout his life, through his emotional reactions, but always in ambivalent attitudes, going and coming, in constant recriminations.
He, through small teachings, simple acts, tried to guide, at first, those first alcoholics, then leave his own experience for those of us who came after him, to give permanence to the message of, Alcoholics Anonymous is called to be the solution to the alcoholism of the world, not of a few generations. And, therefore, I am obliged, if there is a reaction of gratitude in me, to preserve Alcoholics Anonymous as it was donated to me, as it was given to me.
Bill says that we constantly boast of the principles of our community, but, practically, these principles are not ours, they have been inherited,
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we have taken them from the same humanity, and we have practiced them, forced by alcohol. I did not come to Alcoholics Anonymous with a disposition to any discipline. I came, scarred by alcohol. Dowling says, out there, that no alcoholic comes to AA looking for sobriety, there is nothing that seems so boring to him as this. However, what an incredible thing, that the alcoholic, fleeing from the drunkard, reaches sobriety, and one day, fleeing to hell, reaches heaven.
This is, therefore, the concept of the practice of principles, of those principles that, in principle, forced by alcohol, we practice. Through time, with a certain reluctance, with a certain rejection, we are forced to continue practicing them. And, one day, there is a change. One day, we like this way of living in AA, and we submit, sweetly and pleasantly, to this beautiful life in AA. But AA is a feeling, and Bill says, that Alcoholics Anonymous, or the quality of AA, depends on the quality of defeat of each one of us.
I want to understand that he refers to the quality of defeat in the concept of the quality with which I can be surprised not to drink, to be alive, to be surprised by the reach of that divine hand, in a truly miraculous act, with my own existence. If there is no capacity to surprise me, there will be no capacity of faith, there will be no capacity of gratitude, there will be no capacity of unity. Alcoholics Anonymous did not invent anything.
It has observed different techniques of association, and from them, it has tried to get the best out of it. Nothing that we see in Alcoholics Anonymous, we invented it. We were surprised when we arrived, that great freedom, that great camaraderie, the friendship with which all the alcoholics got along, and above all something, no one sent anyone. This was a real surprise. We are a blessed anarchy, which many times we do not understand.
And maybe we do not understand it because of the very concept that the world has of anarchy, maybe those great representatives of them, like a prince who mentions Bill W., a Russian prince, their very acts caused the rejection of this. However, the anarchy that Bill and our traditions speak of, is that freedom of the human being to join others for their own freedom. And through the meeting of an ideal, both will try to enrich the common well-being, or they will enrich that society.
No one sends anyone. When the ancients began to leave, in that beginning, they forced the alcoholic of those days to take responsibility for his group. And this, I think, is something that, I know, I see you, I see your faces, all of you sober, faces of locals, mature, there is no problem. Yes, today we see pure alcoholics, well-responsible, but at that time they were not like that. I do not know if Bill complained or simply wrote history, but he says that, forced by the absence of the ancients, the new ones had to take responsibility.
And from this, democracy was born. They had, right? By avoiding this paternalism, this constant hierarchy of the ancients, they had to act democratically and they began to name their own servants. However, Alcoholics Anonymous shows us, through the same defects and the same experience of Bill, that everything starts in Alcoholics Anonymous, the service of self-naming. Bill himself identifies himself as a hierarch of the group.
They named themselves to safeguard Alcoholics Anonymous and to be able to grant those elementary services from the beginning. To create the office of general services, to create the structure, to create the conference, to create everything that today guides the existence of Alcoholics Anonymous in its three legacies. But they had to self-name, and that attitude had an action that was not very pleasant for many.
They say, Bill, that they created a kind of two-headed papado, or something more or less similar to a school of cardinals. This, as you can see, was an explicit hierarchy, marked in the acts of the same government that they exercised. And not because they did not want the support or the help of others,
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but because my previous colleagues who shared, talked about the abandonment of the alcoholic. Of those alcoholics to whom Bill went to look for the groups when the letters of Jack Alexander asked for a message. And they said, Bill, we decomposed our lives with alcohol, we lost health, we lost the family, we lost the economy. Today God has blessed us with sobriety. You come with strange ideas, you want us to walk like messiahs, you are wrong.
We want to enjoy our sobriety, and that is why we do not want to know about others. We are not interested in people who can come. We do not want strange people. We do not want homosexuals, we do not want social waste. We do not want those people who come and complicate us. We are very comfortable like this. However, all this has a situation. We have taken examples of many things. And there is something fundamental, which few times, at least in the emotional aspect, because intellectually I know everything, intellectually I understand everything, but sometimes understanding does not cause reactions in me.
And I, to react, I have to affect myself emotionally. And there is something here that I probably do not pay attention to, to those great dictators. Those two dictators who can give me a negative or beneficial state of mind. One, I already know what it is, the father of the lights that reigns over all men, God, as everyone understands it. And the other, alcohol. The one who, repeating what God says, I hope you do my will, he says, or does his will, or I kill him.
Those dictators who are going to teach us the good way or the bad way. No one punishes anyone, in Alcoholics Anonymous, we are victims of our own vices, says the tradition. The day the alcoholic like me disobeys and is the victim of the tyrant, of Juan Tequila, he will get drunk on his own vices, he will crawl in his own miseries, he will not be punished. There is no man in Alcoholics Anonymous to punish the one who disobeys.
So, this dictatorship shows us examples, and we have taken these examples, borrowed, they are borrowed ideas, of anarchy, of democracy, of republic, of the hierarchies themselves, of all this, Bill says, that we try to take the good examples of these ideas of association. And we look, we look, he says, and hopefully we have managed to put aside all the disadvantages of this type of theories or ideas.
Until now, I think we have been able to achieve it. I think. Even with the few or great problems we have, of those that the tenth tradition speaks to us, that we are learning to live together, this is a problem that will always be renewed, because new people will always arrive, because there will always be people who suddenly feel that they have dropped the 20, and they have great ideas, new ideas.
There will always be great promoters in the group, there will always be loving triangles, there will always be everything that put in panic, in panic, those first alcoholics. So, today we are united, and we will be. We are united in A, and we will be. And we will be permanently, because we have resolved many of our conflicts, that the happiness of now is the result of the hardships and problems of the past.
From there, from that great pain, now we have enriched our spirit. In this is the greatness of our group. Paradoxical, but real. The antonym of the defect is virtue. From those defects, we have had to achieve virtuous acts to be today free of everything that could break the Anonymous Alcoholics Unit, or destroy it. There is nothing that destroys us. There is nothing that could, at a given moment, everything that put in danger the Anonymous Alcoholics Unit, because the principle has been overcome.
However, the problem of unity, or the concept of unity, is changing with different modalities. I think that even by times, or by fashion, it would be. At that time, they did not have the problem of drug addiction, for example. Today it is a complex problem in the groups, that we do not know how to handle it, how to face it. How to Handle It, How to Face It, Alcoholics Feel Hurt When A Drug Addict Arrives to the Group,
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The Drug Addict Feels Hurt Because He's Not Being Treated Well, What's the Position? That's a Problem, And The Drug Addict Feels Abandoned, And The Alcoholic Feels Broken In His Intimacy of Anonymity, That Problem Didn't Exist Before, If It Didn't, Traditions Would Treat It, In That Time, The Most Frightening Thing Is The Most Common Today, Bill Says They Were Very Frightened When The Love Triangles Began To Take Place In The Groups, In Their Good Name, What Would People Think?
Imagine People With A Victorian Mentality, In That Time, It Wasn't Very Well Seen, However, Time Showed Them That This, That In Our Society It Happened, It Happened In All, And That Maybe In Ours It Was In A Lower Degree, And That The Love Triangles Weren't Going To Break The Common Well-Being, Nor The Love Triangles, They Were Frightened Of Those Who Drank, Some Would Arrive, They Would Stop Drinking One Day, Two, One Month, Some, Until One Year, Suddenly, Pum, They Would Slip, Today We See, Around Here There Are People Of 50 Years Of Sobriety, And The Alcohol Will Always Threaten The Individual, It Will Always Have Me In Fear, In An Individual Way, But It Won't Dissolve The Group, It Won't Break The Common Well-Being, These Are Situations That We Have Overcome, There Are Things That We Need To Reanalyze, That Is Why This Kind Of Events, I Think That This Kind Of Events Is With The Intention Of Renewing The Intention, Worth The Redundancy, Excuse Me For It, Is To Remodify An Emotional State That Sometimes Is Very Exposed To Resentment And Anger, And There Is No Worse Enemy For The Common Well-Being Than Anger And Resentment, Bernard Smith Writes Something Beautiful In Relation To The Unity, To The Concept Of Unity That He Has, And I Think That This Man Who Was Impressed By The Miracle Of Alcoholics Anonymous, He Said That Despite Being Close To Alcoholics Anonymous, He Didn't Understand The Miracle Well, He Saw People Arrive Truly Destroyed, Raised From The Bowery In New York, And Soon After, Reconstructed, They Incorporated Into Society, Into Their Families, And They Were Truly Brilliant Men, Where Was The Key?
However, When Alcoholics Talked To Him About Unity, He Didn't Feel It, For Not Being An Alcoholic, And On One Occasion, Traveling Through England, He Heard The Message Of A Canonist, The Canonist Ed Riven, Who Talked, Who Talked About Unity, About A Concept Of Unity, And That Was What Made Him Fall On The 20th, That Concept Is Something Very Beautiful, Very Beautiful, The Truth Is, Whenever I Have Had A Decline, Certain Reactions, Which I Know You Have Not Had, But To Me, Constantly, Like Sometimes I Feel Like, Instead Of Going To The Group, Going To Kick Them, They Don't Understand Me, They Don't Understand Me, Bastards, Everything I Give Them, I Dedicate Them, I Arrive At The Meeting, I Get Bored, Because They Don't Say What I Want Them To Say, And I Stay With The Thought, That Right Now It Will Get Composed, As Soon As I Go To The Meeting, Those Concepts Of Dr. Bob, That He Said, Well, Sometimes In The Meetings, I Don't Understand Anything, What Someone Is Saying, It Doesn't Provoke Me Anything, But It Makes Me Think, That Maybe The Day After, It Is Serving Him, Well, That Said Bob, But I Want To Go Down To The Tribune, Those Reactions, Visceral, Mine, And Of Some Of My Group Partners, When We Created Those Political Wars, To Reach The Dictatorships, I Wouldn't Say The Special Services Of The Group, Because There Are Two Ways To Serve, One Is To Serve, And The Other Is To Serve, And When Armando Is Seeking To Adorn His Ego, He Seeks To Serve, So, What Is So Impressive, When An Uncommon Ego, Like Mine, Faces Such Simple Things, Like The Ones This Man Writes, And He Says, For There To Be, A True Community, Three Conditions Are Necessary, The Possession Of An Ideal, Of A Common Ideal, That Involves The Departure, And The Division, And The Egoism, The Purpose Of A Common Task, That Is Able To Capture The Imagination, And Give Expression To Loyalty, And The Comradery, The Quality Of Union, Mixed In Such A Way, That The Strength, The Strength Of Belonging, To An Organic Society, That Commits To A Complete Service Of Time, We Can, We Can Find It, When The Ideal Is High, And Valuable, When The Task Is Integrated To Each Ounce Of Our Being, When The Comradery Is So Solid,
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And Deep, That We Respond To Each Other, Without, Without, Without Conscious Effort, We Realize The Ineffable Necessity, And We React To It Spontaneously, And Immediately, Under Such Conditions, All The Vitality That We Used Before In The Critiques, And Seeking To Put The Others In The Place That We Believe Corresponds To Them, We Use That Energy For The Creative Use Of Our Group. This, Of Understanding, Of Understanding All That Infinite Wisdom, That These Men, Through Philosophical Concepts, Maybe Very Repetitive, Because We Hear Them In Other Parts, But I Think That As Sensitively Lived As We Are Few, The Problem, I Said, The Problem In Me Is Then To Create, Right?
To Create A Force Superior To The One That I Always Depended On When I Had To Match It Through A Bottle Of Alcohol. Alcoholics Anonymous Had To Overcome Everything. How Beautiful. One Day, Bill Was Told, Someday You Will Fill The Madison Square Garden Of New York. Five Years Ago, Some Of You And I Had The Opportunity To Confront This Truth In Montreal. Tomorrow, Or Today In The Afternoon We Will Have The Opportunity To Realize That We Are A Bigger Number.
But The Unity Can Be Considered In Quality Because Of The Size Of Itself Or Because Of The Volume Of Its Members Or Because Of The Number Of Themselves Or Because Of The Spiritual Quality. And The Spiritual Quality Is The Quality Of Everything That We Have In The World. I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And knob and Will Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And Will Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And
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I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill Bill And I Am Bill Bill Bill And I Am And I Am Bill Bill Bill I Am Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill I Am Bill Bill Bill I Am Bill Bill Bill I Am Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill I Am Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill
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Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill that declaration of responsibility, it is almost like a ritual question, but already without sobbing, this prayer, I think it should be a kind of inventory, of twelve steps every day, what did you do today, with the one who is drinking? He told me one day, a priest, well, I do not like it, I have bad luck, my group almost does not arrive, maybe because we are there a little hidden, I say, well, but the twelve steps do not have to fall, they are sought, I said, look, I'm going to give you a phone, so that you talk to the social insurance, you sign up, and every time you arrive, those who are going to get drunk, those who go for the incapacity, those who woke up raw and wanting to hang from the shower, they are going to call you, and you will see how they are going to fall, fists of twelve steps, oh, he says, but I have to get out of my job, and if it's Sunday, how am I going to do it with my children? Forget it, keep dragging your misery, while the alcoholic is not able, is not able to love, to love through the manifestation of God, and the manifestation of God on earth is the same man, it is impossible, there is something, I believe, questionable every day for me, they say that the one who works in what he does not love, is an unemployed, even when he does it all day, and this, this has joined a series of reactions, of my aberrations, questions through money, questions always through those who work in our group, questioning them as second or third person, to all those people, always questioning through my own denial, the service committees, constantly questioning the quality of consciousness of my group, and not being part of it, because it is not the same thing to be a majority than to be consciousness, and this is something that I must consider in my individual practice within the group, this is something that Bill does not manifest, so that group consciousness is consciousness, it must be through morality, responsibility and knowledge, and that I do so much to enrich consciousness, I complain about the hierarchies of old people in my group, but I promote them, Bill says that an ignorant people will always allow dictatorships, if I ignore the needs of my group, of my group, if I do not participate, if I do not propose, I have no right to complain, and yet, this is so democratic, so anarchic, so rare, so incomprehensible, a colleague in Mexico says, only God came up with the idea of joining us, so crazy, thank you.
Thank you, comrade Armando. Yes, comrades, the Anonymous Alcoholics Unit is the most esteemed quality that our society has. Next we have the next speaker, comrade Patricia. Good afternoon, my name is Patricia and I am an alcoholic. Hello, hello. Well, it is a pleasure for me to be here today, it is a really sensational experience, I am extremely grateful with my higher power, with Alcoholics Anonymous as a whole, and above all, to have today the opportunity to be able to share with you my experience about unity and service in Alcoholics Anonymous.
Well, first of all, I want to start by telling you about my experience living in these two legacies. To begin with, if it were not for this unity and this service that has existed for 55 years, possibly I would not have the opportunity to be here today talking to you, since, like many people, I refused to accept that I was an alcoholic, definitely because, like many, I thought that Alcoholics Anonymous was for those who drank daily, who had already finished their life, not for a person like me, who did not drink daily, who was from time to time, who was social, in quotes.
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However, one of the things with which I fell in love, I fell in love deeply with Alcoholics Anonymous, it was precisely from that first day that I had the opportunity to attend my first meeting. It is really impressive how people are required to love Alcoholics Anonymous, to love us, those people who we cannot stop drinking and who we do not know how, and who, without any interest, give us their total and absolute help.
In my case, I was definitely very afraid. I grabbed the yellow section and saw an intergroup office near my house. I did not even know what that meant, but I saw that it was near my house. And then I spoke on the phone, and the person who answered the phone was the kindest person I had ever met in my life. With a lot of fear, crying, with a lot of sadness and despair, and above all, shame, of having to speak to a group of Alcoholics Anonymous.
This person patiently waited half an hour, so that in half an hour I could explain to him what my problem was. Crying, crying, crying, I thought that at any moment I was going to hang up. And yet, thanks to that person who had the patience to wait, so that I could explain to him what I wanted, well, today I am here. At the same time, they told me that they were going to go for me, to where I lived.
I could not believe that, I even got suspicious. Why so much kindness? What or why? Maybe they want to kidnap me or something, right? I attended the group, and I left with dark glasses so that they would not recognize me, because I am an extremely famous person, right? And then, what was my surprise that I received? The moment I arrived at the office, there were about five people, and all with a huge smile on their lips.
And I said, well, what's going on? What is this? I had not realized that I had entered the wonderful world of love, comrades, of that love that only someone who has been in hell like me can understand, what is the suffering of an alcoholic sick person like me. At that moment, I still could not believe that these people were so kind to me, right? That day was a Saturday morning. They took me to meetings all day.
There came a time when I already had a lot of confidence in them, and especially because they dared to go with me in the car, I was totally raw, trembling, and I think it is worse a raw driving than a drunk driving, right? Because the reflexes definitely do not work, and they, with all the value of the world, left with me. We arrived at the information meeting, and I began to be more and more surprised to see these people in the best disposition to help me.
Even that word, right? That word of affection. Do not worry. If you have the problem of alcoholism, the problem is ours. I said, well, what is happening? In what world am I? Why? Why? Everything I had known before was only hostility, mockery and shame. However, here I found a friendly hand, not just one, but many friendly hands that offered me a better life, a useful and happy life. I could not believe that.
And this is definitely thanks to the unity and love and the spirit of service that many of us alcoholics have. I think all of us. I was definitely impressed with this amount of love, companionship and affection of which I was the object. Well, I definitely got to the place where I needed to be, where people understood me just as I needed them to understand me. So I stayed. Soon I began to understand that this was not free, that the price of that happiness and that tranquility and that serenity that I need to stay sober, well, it was one.
It was to pay with the same currency, to pay with the same love with which I was received, to pay that person who approaches me for the first time.
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And the truth is that I took it very seriously, because, frankly, I panicked the idea of drinking again. So, when I made an inventory shortly after joining Alcohólicos Anónimos, I realized that my life had changed tremendously, and that the least I could do for Alcohólicos Anónimos or for God was to even attend every step or two that came to me. It was the least I could give Alcohólicos Anónimos. And one of the things that I always try to share with my colleagues is precisely this experience, right?
That for me it has even been like an obligation to myself that every time I have the opportunity for someone to come to me to ask for help, never deny it. Because in exchange for that, I have received with open arms, but with open arms, an amount of love, of happiness, of tranquility in my life that definitely cannot be paid with the best currency in the world. So, yes, as our colleague Armando was saying, sometimes it is hard work.
We are at home, very comfortable, watching TV, right? And we have to go to the other side of the city, or sometimes to another city, to pass the message. But I really ask myself this question. Where could I be now, if it weren't because someone took the trouble to talk to me for half an hour, to give me hope? Where could I be if that person would have preferred to stay at home watching TV? So, I also analyze, well, who gave me the car that I have today?
Who gave me the TV that I'm watching? Who gave me the house where I live? If it weren't for Alcoholics Anonymous, I couldn't have obtained or had anything of the things, the materials that I'm mentioning right now. Now, speaking of the spiritual, who could have given me so much serenity, so much peace, gotten me out of that hell? Well, only Alcoholics Anonymous, and the only thing they ask for in return is a little bit of service.
I remember that, at first, for me, it was a pleasure, a huge pleasure. I didn't understand anything about the meetings, I didn't even understand what it was about. I was quite damaged by my brain. But it was a pleasure to be able to serve those cups of coffee, to be able to vacuum the carpet. I don't know, it was like a way of saying thank you. Thank you for even allowing me to be here today. Because no one outside accepted me.
I was rejected. And yet, in the groups of Alcoholics Anonymous, I was well received. That was my way of thanking. Maybe I didn't understand much of what the meetings were about, but I started to serve. And I realized that, although many people criticized me sometimes, or whatever, to me, that service gave me, although it seems incredible, sobriety. It made me feel good. I felt a happiness that I didn't know why.
Now, with the passing of the years, I have realized that the greatest satisfactions that I have had in my life have not been personal achievements, nor success in my work, nor success in my family, nor any of that. That inner peace that you feel every time you do something for someone, even if you don't want to, even if it's with laziness, however, but every time you do it, and I'm talking about my personal case, it's like an explosion of joy inside me, and frankly, I don't change it for anything.
It has been a wonderful experience for me, especially in the aspect of step 12, to be able to see how someone who didn't serve anything before, and even the family says to him, hey, if you do us the favor of retiring, we would be very grateful. Now it is possible that if I want, and for me that is really huge, to be able to do a job of saving lives. I remember that when I was in my group, at the beginning, in the first years, I asked a very dear colleague of mine, I said, hey, what am I doing?
Why am I in the world? If you knew the mission you have in life, life would be much easier because you already know what you have to do.
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And so on, right? He says, look, don't worry about you. Your mission in life is to save alcoholics and get rid of problems. I said, oh, well, he solved the problem of my whole life. So now I have to dedicate myself to saving alcoholics, not to pass the message to alcoholics. And it has really been a wonderful mission that that higher power has been able to give me. Because in different associations that I have been in, in the course of my life, in none, in none have I lived and felt what is lived here.
That disinterested love for the life of someone, whoever that someone is. I believe that this is what magnifies the human being the most, to give, to serve, to share those things that have given me life and have given me light. And what better job and what better mission in my life than this, right? I feel like this, like extremely honored to be able to have this opportunity to serve, especially someone as magnanimous as, in my case, that higher power.
And that through Alcoholics Anonymous I have that wonderful opportunity. Because, okay, how many times have I had the opportunity to belong to religious associations, to other types of events, and groups, and yet in none, in none have I felt so satisfied, and so at ease, and so happy as in ours. I also wanted to share a little about the service within the schedules of women. I had the opportunity to serve when these types of schedules began to be initiated, and I couldn't believe that…
Well, I went because I was confused, right? To see what it was about and what this was about. And yet it was impressive to see how it is so difficult for some women to have the opportunity to attend the groups of Alcoholics Anonymous, and how difficult it is to lose to alcohol. When we started with these groups, we were very few women, and yet, little by little, more and more began to join. We even had the opportunity to go to a group in the city of Fresnillo, Zacatecas, there in Mexico, and we were 13 women.
And it was an impressive thing, because they say that women together are not dead. Well, of course! Thirteen women, and we didn't have any quarrel for three days, and we worked perfectly, we passed the message on the radio. In that city of Fresnillo, there were no women, and yet, after a year of attending, there were already 13 women in the groups of Fresnillo, Zacatecas. It was something really moving, because I think that a year later, a woman had arrived for each one of us.
However, now there are many hours of women in Aguascalientes and in many states of the Mexican Republic, and that's just because of a simple little job, a simple desire to give, to share. What job is hard for me? Nothing. In exchange for that, I have received life. It can be said that few people, and I think that the Alcoholics Anonymous are one of those, that we have known hell and heaven in the same life.
This new opportunity to live, this new life, which in my case was literally being born again, thanks to those people who forgot a little about themselves to give me a lot, but a lot of their love, of their good will, and of their faith. I believe that there is no service, no matter how small, that does not receive its reward. And I don't do it for the reward, although sometimes I do, because I'm not perfect.
But sometimes I say, well, I know I'm going to do this, but maybe the boss will reward me with something. And sometimes the reward is simply the satisfaction of forgetting a little about myself. I wanted to tell you something that has helped me a lot. The best rewards I have received within A.A. is precisely forgetting a little about myself to give, to give the much that I have received, even if I give it in a very simple way, in my own way.
But I am convinced that love, that seed of love that each of us, the Alcoholics Anonymous, can sow,
[00:50:03]
will always give, like a huge mustard tree. Comrades, this is my experience, and it was really a pleasure for me to be able to share it with you. Thank you very much. Thank you, Comrade Patricia. What can I say about my service? It seems that I have served very little in my life, and even in my work, I think I serve. I am the treasurer of the State Committee in Massachusetts, of Habla Hispana. Now that I return, they will ask me for accounts, they will say that I came to spend the money of the Committee.
But I already have the report ready for when I return, I don't know when I will go. It is that there has always been someone who has thought that I am going to eat at the restaurant, or to pay for the coffee with the other comrades, with money from the Committee, right? And I prefer to give exact accounts. And speaking of service, in Alcoholics Anonymous I was quite well served. When I came to Alcoholics Anonymous for the first time, there were three people in the group, it was the first session that opened in that group, and there was a coordinator who was my godfather for some time.
If he is here, raise your hand. No, none of them. He was Salvadoran, we called him the bad boy. No, that's what the other comrades called him, I always respected him. That day, the priest had brought me the message there to the house, the day before. Someone had told him that Jorge was dying of drunkenness over there, cornered in an apartment, and that I should go see him, right? So the priest went and came to see Jorge, to the apartment, and asked me, what's wrong with you, why are you drinking so much?
I am told that you are drinking every day. I told him that I had a very good wife, that I loved her very much, and that I had two children, and that she had abandoned me. That I loved this woman very much, but that she had been very incomprehensible, that she had been very brave, that she had been this, and that she had been everything bad that there was in life. I didn't tell him anything about me, simply that I was drinking because I loved her very much.
And the priest told me, look, there is going to be a session of Alcoholics Anonymous. Have you heard of Alcoholics Anonymous? And I, sincerely, the only thing I had heard of Alcoholics Anonymous was that it was a community of old bald men who were learning to drink so as not to have problems, so as not to have physical problems, and so as not to have problems with their families when they came home.
But all those people needed to have a lot of money to pay the membership in Alcoholics Anonymous. And the person who had given me this information said, well, you don't have enough money for that, you can't go. I mean, that's the information I had of Alcoholics Anonymous. So this priest tells me, you don't know anything about Alcoholics Anonymous. And I, so as not to get into trouble, I told him, look, I don't know anything.
Then he tells me, tomorrow there is going to be a session of Alcoholics Anonymous, and here there are thousands and thousands of recovered people in this program, he says, the Americans. But here there is going to be a meeting tomorrow. A man is going to come from Brighton. Brighton is 35 miles away from where I live. Around Brighton, the community is also quite a drinker. It is a Hispanic community.
And throughout that area, there is the area of downtown Massachusetts, downtown Boston, where everyone drinks, especially, without aggravating the Puerto Rican present, especially the Puerto Ricans, right, who have a lot of ease to get the drink. This man went from that Brighton to the place where I live, to take the message. And the first lost drunk who got there,
[00:55:00]
well, I was the third, because when I got there, there were two, I always arrive late to everything. There were two drinkers there on one side, right, and the gentleman, the companion, my godfather, was not talking to that couple. When I arrived, he tells me, sit down. He says, look, there are the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. There was a sign with the 12 steps. He tells me, start reading them.
And I started reading them. When I finished, I turned my face to where he was, and he says, what do you think? I say, wow, they are fantastic. I don't know, I don't remember a single word of what I have read of that, right. And right away he tells me, do you want a coffee? I said, yes, of course. Go and serve a cup of coffee. There is a small coffee shop there. He says, do you want two tablespoons of sugar or do you want one?
I say, yes, put two. He says, do you want it with cream or do you want it with milk? I say, put it with cream. And he served it to me. He served it to me and put it there. And I said, thank you. All of that surprised me a lot. I said, this guy, what's wrong with him? It seems to me that he likes men. But this guy was so badly dressed, he was so badly dressed, he had the face of a soldier. The soldier of my country, I am Mexican.
And I thought for a moment that if not, he would be deviating, right? But after he offered me the second cup, in the same way, with the same requirements, I thought that he was simply a person who liked to talk to others. And I said, I am going to be good friends with this man. And when we finished the session, the other two gentlemen who were there, they told me, hey, Mexican, give me a peso to go buy a bottle.
I said, no, I don't bring it. They went to drink, and that day I went and told this man, I said, I think you and I can be good friends. I had friends in the bar, but it was the bartender who always came with the towel, and he would sit there, change the glass for me, raise the air conditioning, lower the heating according to the season, right? And they treated me quite well, but I brought money, I was paying.
This time, in this session, I did not bring money, nor did I think that the man was going to charge me the coffee cups. I told him, I think you and I can be good friends. And he said, I think so, he put his hand on me, and we started talking, and from then on, this man was my godfather. We ran up and down, groups in English, groups in Spanish, and, comrades, that day this man gave me a suggestion. He said, do whatever you want, whatever you did, but don't drink this day.
And I have continued doing that, comrades. The only suggestion that I have followed to the letter has been that, 18 years ago. Don't drink this day. And I have not drunk. Comrades, for this, I thank my superior being, God, as everyone understands, and on this 55th anniversary, I think we should all thank our superior being for this community of Alcoholics Anonymous. I am going to introduce my third speaker, comrade Tadeo.
Thank you. To everyone present, greetings. My name is Tadeo and I am an alcoholic. And, believe me, I have been breathing more than I can in the moment I have been sitting and listening to my comrades. I would like to thank my superior being, my principal being, who for me is the Lord Jesus Christ. Thank you, Alcoholics Anonymous. Thank you to the people with whom, through these times that I have remained in Alcoholics Anonymous, I have been able to achieve and remain in this great fraternity.
Cuando recibí la invitación, y quizás es normal para todos nosotros, para cualquier
[01:00:00]
persona que va a tener contacto de hablar con otros, lo primero que se piensa es prepararse, y eso fue lo que empecé a hacer, y quiero contarles precisamente lo que pasó en ese periodo desde que yo recibí la carta, alguno de ustedes ha tenido una televisión en su casa que no tiene cambios de canales, y solamente está viendo un canal, pues desde que yo empecé a querer prepararme, ha habido algo intermitente en mi mente, he andado manejando millas, he estado trabajando, he estado en juntas, he estado platicando, y esa cosa intermitente no se me ha quitado, se me había olvidado porque andaba en medio de los compañeros escuchando charras, y uno de ellos me regañó, y me dijo, anteriormente lo he visto que cuando va a participar se recoge un poco y no anda tanto de vago, y se me había olvidado desde que salí de indio, y hoy estaba recordando eso que quería decirles, yo sé que Alcohólicos Anónimos no pertenece a ninguna organización, ni es religioso, pero nos da la oportunidad de que cada uno pueda manifestar su fe, y yo quiero hacer uso de mi fe, y manifestarles esto que constantemente ha estado conmigo, yo sé que viene gente de todo el mundo, yo sé que este día, tal vez no están aquí, pero están involucrados en este pueblo de Chiaro, yo sé que este día es histórico en la humanidad, yo sé que la sombra de ustedes, la presencia de ustedes en este lugar es histórica, tal vez el mundo no la pueda ver, pero los ancianos que han caminado algún tiempo en Alcohólicos Anónimos, y han concebido la esencia de este principio, puedan sentir esto, y es lo intermitente es esto que yo quiero decirles, que cada uno de vosotros reciba este día la paz del señor Jesucristo en sus corazones, y no escuchen con sus mentes, sino con vuestros corazones, y que eso puedan llevarlo a donde quiera que vaya. Esa paz que tanto necesitamos los humanos. En el transcurso de esta meditación y de esta preparación a través de estar con esto, se me vino un ejemplo muy antiguo, hace más de mil años, que sucedía en un lugar, en circunstancias similares de las que ahorita estamos, un pueblo sufría el caos, un pueblo sufría la tragedia, el abandono, un pueblo se sentía solo y aniquilado, porque le habían matado a su rey, y esa tarde que se reunían en cierto lugar como estamos nosotros, aparecieron dos ángeles y les dijeron al pueblo que estaba allí, ¿Por qué estás estáticos? ¿Qué es lo que estás mirando hacia el cielo? ¿Que no te has dado cuenta que ese Cristo por el que estás viendo al cielo vive entre vosotros, y que vuestro trabajo es manifestarlo y llevarlo al mundo? Y desde ese momento empezaron a hablar las gentes en sus lenguas, en sus idiomas, y los árabes escuchaban bien a los que hablaban la otra lengua, y todos podían entender el mismo idioma, el idioma del amor, el idioma que Dios había dejado a los hombres establecido. Y esta tarde es histórico, porque ese mismo espíritu nos está diciendo ¡Id! Manifiesta tu vida, porque tú no eres
[01:05:09]
cualquier cosa, tú eres un milagro, tú no eres cualquier basura, tú has surgido de las tinieblas a la luz. Y aquellos que vienen de diferentes partes del mundo, llevemos ese sentimiento, somos velas entre las tinieblas, somos almas especiales, que podemos darle no solamente al alcohólico, al mundo entero, el ejemplo de la verdadera unidad entre los hombres, el ejemplo máximo de cómo los hombres en la tierra podemos vivir, porque el tema que se me ha encomendado precisamente es unidad y servicio. Y yo pienso que para hablar de estos dos temas, en primer lugar para sentir estas dos estados, que es el de estar unido a Alcohólicos Anónimos y del servicio de Alcohólicos Anónimos, primero hay que ver la recuperación del hombre, porque todo alcohólico que llega a Alcohólicos Anónimos necesita recuperar, porque lleva emproblemado, lleva problemas mentales, lleva problemas espirituales, lleva problemas físicos, necesita salud, necesita restablecer su mentalidad, necesita encontrar algo, un fundamento, y razón es por eso que el primer legado de recuperación está en primer lugar, y un alcohólico que permanezca en los grupos no importa cuántos años, sino si aplica los doce pasos de recuperación, nunca va a poder saborear estos otros dos legados, porque si una persona no está unida a sí mismo, a sus sentimientos, a sus obras, no está unida a sus satisfacciones, no está unida a lo que en su mente, en su imaginación ha llevado, es muy difícil que pueda estar unido a otro ser, por eso se necesita, como dicen nuestros antiguos padrinos, el despertar del espíritu, el despertar espiritual, por eso necesita todo alcohólico la limpieza de sí mismo. Dicen que hay casos específicos de inmediato, el caso de Bill, pero el caso de los otros necesita precisamente el proceso de los doce pasos de Alcohólicos Anónimos, y yo considero que en donde encuentra la unidad del hombre consigo mismo, en donde encuentra la unidad de manifestarse precisamente, es cuando llega al cuarto paso, unido al quinto paso, es cuando el hombre se une precisamente a sí mismo, acepta su vida, acepta su tragedia, acepta la derrota en definitiva, cuando puede confesar aquello que por años ha mantenido oculto y que por años lo ha llevado en una ruina trágica constantemente. Entonces, para hablar de unidad, precisamente, vamos a padrinar al nuevo que va llegando a la necesidad de estar limpio para poder unirse a sus compañeros de Alcohólicos Anónimos. Pero hay cosas que interrumpen la unidad dentro de nosotros los alcohólicos anónimos, y hay que hablarlo, y hay que decirlo, pues, decía mi compañero, el mentiroso, el farsante que llevamos. Un amigo de Alcohólicos Anónimos lo manifestaba. Decía que muchos alcohólicos creían que era Juan Tequila el enemigo número uno, y él decía que para el alcohólico el enemigo número uno es el farsante que lleva. Lo decía mi compañero. Hay que tener cuidado del farsante. ¿Cuántas veces llegamos al grupo y decimos, compa, desde que yo me decían alcohólicos anónimos soy un hombre feliz, y la realidad es que no es feliz, no es feliz. ¿Cuántas veces decimos, cuando andamos desgobernados en nuestra vida, acompañando damas que no son las nuestras, decimos nosotros, es que ando muy feliz, muy contento. Y eso es una farsa. Esto lo sabemos precisamente los que hemos tenido experiencia en estas situaciones. Es una farsa.
Entonces necesita el hombre precisamente esa depuración. Necesita mantener ese cuidado y
[01:10:01]
ese alerta con ese enemigo número uno que está siempre muy alerta con nosotros. Yo a veces les digo a mis compañeros, ya ni me dan ganas de saludar a los compas preguntándoles cómo están, porque los hago mentir. A mí me dan ganas, les digo a mis compañeros, platicando, ¿no? Me dan ganas de saludarlos y decirles que la sobriedad esté contigo. Pa' que no me mientan, pues. Y para ya no mentir yo también. ¿Cómo estás, compa? ¡A toda madre! Mentira. ¿Dónde estás, compa? ¡A toda madre! ¡Anda algo mal! Llegamos al grupo muchas veces, muy elocuentes y muy de aquellas, y con algún problema muy profundo en economía, con celos horriblemente con la compañera de vida. ¿Y cómo estás, compa? ¡A toda madre! Entonces yo creo que partiendo desde ese punto de vista, esta persona nos ha dejado una luz encendida. Hay que mantener ese alerta, no con los compañeritos, sino con nosotros mismos. Poder manifestar la expresión de ti mismo, no la de otro, la de ti mismo. Ojalá los que hayan venido a esta convención y cuando sus esposas les pregunten, ¿qué tal estuvo la convención? No hay andado por allá. ¡Qué cosas más tremendas las que pasan!
Hablando de unidad, yo creo que el alcohólico tiene que empezar a manifestar su fe. ¿Cuántos de ustedes tienen grandes secretos escondidos de la fe? ¿Cuántos de ustedes tienen miedo a manifestarse espiritualmente en los grupos? ¿Porque tienen miedo a que les vayan a decir algo? Hay necesidad de unirse. ¿Cuántos andamos presentando la cara de muy divertidos, de muy allá, y allá en el fondo somos personas diferentes?
Entonces, ¿por qué no dejamos aparecer al verdadero alcohólico en nuestras vidas, al hombre que es, y dejar de andar aparentando otro? Hay que dejar al hombre, y eso es lo que el programa de Alcohólicos Anónimos, en su fundamento, nos pide, la unidad. Porque a veces estamos amontonados, pero no estamos unidos. Ahora la unidad a través de Alcohólicos Anónimos, lo decían mis compañeros, la podemos ir consiguiendo a través de vislumbrar las vías que ya Alcohólicos Anónimos tiene establecida. Y respetar esas vías que Alcohólicos Anónimos nos ha ido dando. Y hablando de respetar estas vías, fíjense que, si ustedes han sido analistas, y si ustedes han visto la situación, han abierto los ojos, esta convención, a pesar de estar muy hermosa, a pesar de ser histórica, dentro del movimiento de AHA, ha tenido sus pequeños problemitas. Y eso lo voy a decir porque no me gusta andar murmurando afuera.
Uno de ellos ha sido esto. No podíamos dormir con mis compañeros, porque cuando nos presentamos a registrarnos, vimos cincuenta y cinco. No les dije yo, es que cincuenta y cinco aniversario, no. Son cincuenta y cinco dólares. Y pobres los de Canadá, porque le subieron otros diez más. Son sesenta y cinco. Yo sé que hay paquetes especiales, hay actos especiales, hay shows especiales, y esos se pagan con dinero.
Y yo, mi sugerencia va a ser para el próximo comité, yo se le iba a hacer a Vicente, pero él nos dijo claramente, hay un comité que la identificación, que nuestro nombre, lo saquen del paquete económico y pueda ser gratis para todos los que vengan. It's going to be free for everyone who comes, because there are many who are sad because they couldn't get it. And others are angry because the fifty-five brought it for something else.
[01:15:02]
And not only in us, it's the problem. Being sitting in a coffee shop, a gavacho came up to him, as he affectionately calls him, and he said to another, there in the coffee shop, and he said, and you go? As if saying, I already paid my seventh, and you? So I see that this breaks the spirit of the seventh tradition. As I say, I know this is worth a lot, but for the next ones, and I'm going to make you a little letter, for the next ones, to sign up for a free convention, and for the rest to cost.
How are business conventions? And speaking of service, we are in this. Because many of us introduce ourselves many times, and we go there, and we don't say what we feel. We have to expose these situations, and we have to do it. And my suggestion is not only for here, for the gavachos, but also for our people there. Alcoholics Anonymous, for some reason the traditions were written. They say that the hat is passed so that the one who has funds does not humiliate the one who does not have.
And that is written. We can look for shortcuts, we can look for other places, we can find them. We can rationalize this, but the reality is that it bothers. The next experience was here. An American companion, and it is worth telling you, came to us. And she told us that she had spent all her money on buying the bacha and in the hotels, and that she was not going to eat. And we invited her to eat. These are realities.
I thought that in this experience we would see it more in the Latino people. And two witnesses accompanied me of the facts, and they told me, because they were constantly repeating to me, that this topic was not necessary to talk about. And I told them, it is worth it. I have no resentment. I am not angry, but we have to point out the way for others. I think, these are important things. Another thing, in the service, a lot has been said constantly.
And it has been argued in many meetings, that if the service recovers or not. I think that those who fight the most about this, are those who do not want to serve. I say with my respect. And to us, it is worth it. I say with my respect. And analyzing this of the service, and reading what is already written, I think that a person who does not serve, is deprived of the presence of the new tenants. Of the new tenants that Bill was talking about in his last days.
One of them is faith. A person who does not get up from his house, who does not leave the television, and goes to his group with the desire to share the life he is living, how can he see the fruits of his faith? He is a dead, dying individual, constantly. A man who does not serve, how can he manifest? Humility. And the one who does not serve, does not mess with anyone. And to the servant, as it is known, sometimes we lament the mother.
And this servant can check, to see if he already has the tenant of humility. Because the servant who lies, who laments, who is saddened by a mother's lament, does not have the tenant in his heart of humility. Then he needs to put that tenant in his heart, so as not to be eroding pieces of the liver, so as not to be with emotional disturbances,
[01:20:01]
so as not to be with anxieties. And a person who does not serve, how can he practice that? He needs to manifest, he needs to say, he needs to meddle. I lament a lot the desertion of some old people in AA, of some groups. They say, I will not go to such a group, because there are many miscreants. Some of us only want to be listening to angelic songs, choirs. And I think, where do we come from? Who are we?
Why are we going to leave Alcoholics Anonymous in a broken bank? Why are we going to leave those who come, double, with double stigma, to Algarete? Have our lives not come with the same emotional and mental disturbances? Why am I going to get upset today? Because X or Y partner tells me, this son, let him say it. I know that he is not against me, he is against what I am telling him. I know that tomorrow he will come to me, after having lamented the mother, and he will hug me and he will tell me how I felt bad.
But today I thank you very much for what you told me that day. You know, tremendous and exceptional things have happened to me. When I fell in Los Angeles, and I manifested my faith, I manifested the love that an alcoholic partner should have for his family, the respect for his wife. And I began to manifest the application of the 24 hours, in that tremendous defect that accompanied me, which is lust, the desire to seduce another, and another, and another woman.
That year that I manifested in Los Angeles, that year the terrible plague was falling on the humanity of AIDS. That same year, I don't know how many lives God sent me to save. I think I came for other problems, but God has secret ways. God has hidden services for many of you, as I believe he has had for me. That same year, years later, with pain, I heard some of the people who told me, why don't you listen, Tadeo?
It's too late. Those lives are gone. On the other hand, others have told me, blessed be God that I listened to you, and I believed you. I have been faithful to my wife for seven years. Blessed be God. And that is the people that Alcoholics Anonymous is invited to constitute. Because we are fed up with sermons. We want men of action. We want profound prints within humanity. We don't want painted carats.
We want whole men. And that is the merit that I see within Alcoholics Anonymous. To be able to walk in the path of life, and see the print of the different man in my actions, in my life, with my children, with my community, with my companionship. And I believe that the path to service gives us that flavor of incense, that flavor of honey, that flavor of life, that flavor that your soul tells you, you are not something useless.
You are a son of God. You are a son of the Most High. You are like a tree planted next to a stream that anyone who passes by your life will take from its fruits. How beautiful. How beautiful is the power of God in our lives. And that is the message in service. It is not a matter of fighting. It is not a matter of suffering. It is not a matter of agonizing. It is a matter of living. And may that spirit that God has given us shine wherever we go.
Being united and serving with you, I know that I am preparing a future for my children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren who will come. Not only for me, but also as a blessing for the blood that goes from generation to generation.
[01:25:00]
So I believe sublimely in that. That in me, history has had a stop. That in me, history tells my descendants, you will be blessed. That in me, history tells my descendants, you will be blessed forever. I believe in that, and that accompanies me. Thank you very much, may God bless you. Thank you, comrade Tadeo, and thank you to the other comrades, comrade Patricia and comrade Armando. Thank you very much.
And thank you very much for your tolerance, comrades. We are going to close this session with the words of I am responsible. I am responsible when anyone and wherever they are, they extend their hand asking for help. I want the alcoholic's hand to always be there, and that is why I am responsible. Comrades, we are missing the last prayer. They have already left. Our Father, Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. Do not let us fall into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen. Amen. Keep coming. This is working.