TRUE CONFFS VS YOVR MAGAZINE FOR A BETTER LIFE STILL 10° MYFRIEND,BING by Frank Sinatra Complete Novel HUNGRY HEARTS AFAWCETTMAGAZINE

MAYBE YOU KN ONfY AS ATCO HOLI U SCORN ‘1\i+ “o YOU SflUN US. i PE8#APS -n.,1:r,

ATTER YOU EAD MY ,a

s70Ry, You w ‘{AV ITY”‘US ,’ INSTEAD, AND U RSTAND A LtTTLf BETTER WHy_

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rI Wo* I was graduated from boarding school, bought me beautifuI are unable to drink normally. With n college the class prophet predicted clothes. and gave me a car and the us ofle drink is too many-a hundred :e that I would marry a prominent citi- biggest allowance of any girl in col- too few. We can never sueceed in zen, become president of the Women’s lege. becoming controlled drinkers and rat Club, and be known as the richest, – Five years later I was an aleoholic, we }rrow it. Our only answer- is to on prettiest and most popular woman in drinking like a crazy woman. You mav stop, and that, as &ery alcoholic .nd town. A wholesome phophecy surely wonder how a woman can call herseif knows, is a torturously dtftcult tling ike *and it xang true, because that, is the an aleoholic, particularly a woman to do.’ ”ay sort of a girl I was, fifteen years ago- as genteel and delicat,ely reared Ia some ways this is going to be ar- likeab1e, attraetive, and an extraordi- as myself. The reason is that I have a hay! story to write. In-other ways narily nice little thing. joined AA and become a realist. I it rvill not be as rlifficult, as vou mieht rore My parents were what is known as know what I am, and am not afraid imagine, because to teil thl trutli I orne “comfortably off,” They sent me to , 951 to admit it. Alcoholics are people who like to talk about myself. All alco-

holics, drunk or sober, are communi- the city, but my family was moving settied, and at first I thought New cative. We are the most social-minded back to the suburb in whi.ch I had York was going to be fun. But when people in the world. and born good- glown up. and I persuaded Tom to Mother went back to Illinois and I had doers. Alcohoiics Anonymous brought commute. He had enough money (a tb” whole day to myself, I soon me back to sanity and decency, and tiny legacy) to furnish the little flat changed my mirtd. In the morrrings now I rvant to teli r,r’hat AA does, of his dreams. But I wanted a house. I drove Tom to the station. Th; hou, it rl,oLks, and r.vh”lr. In order to I argued that Tom should spend what there rvas nothing to do until he came do this, I must confess to a congenital he could. and iet py lamily do the home. ra,eakness and a lile of man5, shameful rest-and. as usual, I had my way. Nobody came to cali. and I did not things. But in older to help others, lYe lived fourteen biocks from the knorv horv to make friends. Some- I am glad to l,l.’rite this intensely per- family. and every day Mother and I tim€s at the Shopping Center \.omen sonal true conlession. had luncheon togeiher. Her bridge nodded and smiled, but the abilirv to Because AA pledges its mem- respond seemed frozen r.vithin me, bers to anon5rrnity, I cannot teli and I turned stiffiy, away. my name. I am thirty-foul years “If people don’t want to be oid, married to a successful- pro- friendly, so what?” I demanded. fessional man, and live on Long !\lant Io “I can get along all right.” Island. My father is the salt of the earth and a pillar of respect- U0 ptA[ES ? “But maybe they do. A11 you do is mope,” complained Tom. abiiity, and my mother one of the ‘Why don’t you get inter.ested in best women God ever made. something?” When I *’as a girl we had wine “Because I don’l wani to. For at our house only on Sunda5’ goodness sake leave me alone!” mornings when the cook served a It was my fault that rve began bit of sherly on top of the grape- to grorv apart. When I continued fruit. Mother was a teetotaler to rebuff him, Tom 1itera1ly left except ior the grapefruit, and me alone. Father never drank anything Loneliness is the root of most stronger than beer. I attended a misery, and salvation lies ia work convent outside of Chicago, and and service. Years later I r,l,as rvas graduated at nineteen flom a to play, “For work to do and leading u,omen’s co11ege. The strength to do the r,,”‘ork, I thank family moved-from the Midrvest Thee, Lord.” But in those days to New England r*’hen I entered I was too fiIled with self pity to college. They wanted to cushion get a good look at myself. My life for me, to make everything husband did not understand me. as soft and pleasant as pos- I thought, my parents neglecred sible. I1HERE’S n iob wcriting lor you in ^ Washlngton. D. C, Yes, ihousqnds me. Life was horrible. and it was During senior year I feli in love oI slenogrcphers, lypists and clerks everybody’s fault but rnine. with a boy from Tech and beiame are ueeded lhere by the Army $erice Reviewing my life, I realize now engaged. Getting ma::ried seemed how eompleteiy I have always Forces. like fun, and the family raised no . You con lake c Civil Servics ex- conformed to the alcoholic patobjections. Tom is four years tern. Medieal studies tell us that oldel than I am, and for ail he has crninclion iu your hometown USf, most alcoholics ale emotionallv been through, a good person, I oflice or your loccl post ofiice. immature, and that many .rL guess. At least he tried to help . Your lqre pill be ptrid trom your spoiled, touchy by nature, and me. And if, in the plocess, he was home lown by the Wcr Daportment. lormented by loneliness. pretty badly hurt himself. that is r You’ll be aei ol ihe station by Tom had been drinking lor probably my fault. I will tell you counseltirs. about eighteen months befor.e I more about Tom later. i Your housing is guor<tnteed. got started, but Tom is no alco- ‘We were malried in August in . You musl be lTrh feors or over. II holic. He can “take it or leave it.,’ Trinity Chureh, and had a recep- Competition at the plant was tion altellvard at the Copley Piaza I’au qle under 18, you’ll nead your terrifie, and he had to rnake good palerts’ wrilt6n consenl. Hotel, rvhere the guests toasted us i Your solory will range lrom 5146 to or be fued. He rvas frightened, in grape juice. We r,r’enl to Ber- he felt bad about being transmuda on our honeymoon, and 5l6tl <r rncnth il you ore c beginner. planted, and he was lonely, too. aithough there . r.l’ere a dozen lncrecses are given on merit crnd He had joined a golf club and brides on the boat, my clothes cbility. did most of his drinking at the were the plettiest, my bathing a Unless fou qro olrecdy eneployed in nineteenth hole. Once in a rvhile suits the smartest, and my eve- gome wsr iadustry, toke a iob with he brought someone home. If I ning dresses the most stunning. the Army Service Forces in Wcshing- had one or two drinks *’ith them- Our wedding trip was a gift from swell, as Tom r'”‘ouId say. If I the family. Dad had cabled that lon! didn’t—okay. every attention be paid us. and Then one night two o! the men our suite was fraglant rvith roses had their wives with them. and and lilies. The orchestra played ior the first time in months Tom our favorite tunes. The rvine seemed giad to have me alound. steward brought champagne to our group took me up, and I joined the After a few drinks .,r,e made some table. Women’s Ciub. They thought I rvas sandwiches, and before long the boys “I suppose,” said Tom, “we should ”cute.” and called me the Ch’iid Blide. r.r’ere harmoRizing. Our guests stayed &ink it. But you knou,, Ann, I think Looking back I knorv how thoroughly until midnight, and rve all agreed that the stufi is terribly over-rated.” they spoiled me-Mother and Dad and it was a wonderful evening. “So do I,” I said. “It tickles my their friends-and horv tragic it rvas. “Honey,” said Tom as we were goine nose.” And we told the steward not For nearly t,”vo years I lived in this to bed.- “1’ou took to those hleh”ball! to bring any more. over-protective, loving atmosphere. like a duck to water-” Tom had a chemist’s job with an Then Tom was transferred. Our “It r,r.as the first good time I,ve had engineei-ing fi.rm in the Midwest. He next home was in a fashionable suburb out here,” I defended mysell. ,,you,ve had w-anted to take an apartment in of New York. Mother helped us get been lPlease turn ta page g1] 50

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ts sick. jVlother.said,

ill{ 0llt0t 0t PBtt|Eililot is worth e pound of cure ! J.H.T,.IrIPJYIOXRfS sre scienrificoily fsr less irritoting to the nose ond proved fhroqf When smokers changed ro oos.e.or rhroar_due ro smoking Pn[rp Moanrs, r”uuru”-r;urii l1i,,1″…r9aredupcomprerely, sverl case of irrimrion of the or deiinitei, ,^Orl””jf -lrom the findings ol a group ol dittingttisbed d.ocrors.

FAR F/fiER tlAyoR HR *toR€ffi

WT ARr arid r’.,ll”d rioc ,,li o Wl:it- I Lur,er p,j , , ,,, i, ‘,i;”; ,_l 1, \ii,] calre plain stupidity, and I got to bE 1 roN rLY proplr nti:.ed n1a1,q11.j. “” ‘tL:J il ulsa It cL-. ‘W” mi3hr .ri rrr l 1 qel ”I don’t knorv th, ulT Lo a goocl J’oLt *:’trr to q. t,r sia.t.” .she s:rid. i,ir; rirr ” Tonr .aid .i. re :rl\\’dJr tllrr(, irr- _llrr-ir._ ciirr., },i;,r ,i..k ,,, *”i”‘- “,”irrj,”1r {ctlirr.: Ict:]r:- i_-;ilt t:lrr rr r.rr,;c 5iil , ,P,.^t1″ :rrr,l O’1,”.; p.,,pl. :.tri:: ])a!.r r,..r.1 1ie. gr{ ,lig :,ll-;1r,,;:i’l,,nl=,1 ,|i 1’1. ,. ‘.y’,’, ‘.,,,1a” :atit(. ‘.hit,f . l,-Cr,l– \\,. \,._..(. t:,.i ilir iied yr -,.i,.r:,h t,.. kier- , ‘,;;,[]i”,;ll ,l::l atourrd l,-. nrLrel.:r: r,,. 1;r.6i …:rrssiirc f, i,, fl-..i.1 drinking for aqes. Tonr. anil now l.rn go_ tlre,n.iuesi oe,,pie I i,-d | ::;,, ii;.. :.cdtct..i ; ;;,;r;;, party la:ted :tnli j :lh^c+ =;:. :,..=,,,:1, i)lLi c’. 1.n l.Tri. rr. ..,. j,. a , ,””.,rIi,,, inq lo c,-1tch utr l, ,”,,. .ighr u.,. \,.rtsr.,. nr ;,,,frr.’ i’f__ ,,1 nr.. Ther. i _:,,,r_.L,,,,t . ,._l’* “”a ,,.. i,inn,r’,,, _^i .didn r ri.r.rpl, n,r thri ii;n:l)ra1 “1r-, lVIn r.l eph,, r:e,l sn,,,,,{o,lll,’-, huin+ \Vi.cn T,r:. . ,1;ni.ir .,a rf-,,.t’i’* . -ton1 5 Irl)ot…u:.\ ]r.,… i ,, L. ,e 11.r,.r : tn-r’ lr.alri.. t ,^,ci hl::. r., and-I tr..t -r. i,lh. !n,,-ts \\.,,man 1{aint.;oi..l, I {lele: :, lI!il l,r’r; f lett t:.,,r. i.Y_i,,i’,* \trre i’ented . h,,irs. l,alrui.il-,’,,-,*.,., s^td. ‘C,,,n- ,,,.,-t. :,t:d .,.,,iie:r niqf1,.. q66, i’r,1.-l’ j]l: ,”,, hu.rne… f.rl..; hrJ ,”,,,iil:r*.i a chur.ch arrd r +ull cltrl, rire -up ,’ ,r.li.’l fll\ rnq me m.r ;,ll,rrar…. l,r:d ., ., , i.: Tlii. ,r,,.c I thouqhr. rv- ll j,,in itr, ,,t, ,,.t ‘,,,,,f J rv:r. te-ii,:. nr.,1\ :!.1.k. h,r{ I coltrrr. llle Unliui,t,abl\’ .{,(,ki “. ii’.’ l,-“– ‘it s l;17 heajth 1.,,.t uo eulf on ssvr’r’ri “,,,,:,;;,: ..’s,. ilk* rr.e ..ltei,Jt.d i i.t),hl-1. 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Sor,rr I s:r: trr c.li.-t,uyer. r.n,.l, li,.= ir,-ou,rl o.,r rk. ,riil, a rhrobbing. head aid fr”.,:irri.’-i”‘.,.,,iii , ” ; ;,hrh”‘ ir’d ;;; J;- :,.i . i,il”: : i :i’,;” :, l;,”J l lrolstcled m-\’ ulrinior.r tir;,r .:ru :. n.:1.,mouth. but a ..l.rair. “ui hatud rrrt. hecanse I *,,. to=i,,g n,..”t,, r’n,l ,r”,jA. the doe iir^r f,,i; 1ooks. Poor Tonr ,,,i: “, rt easier for. :r.ie 1o respoircl i,, ii:i”,r.ii, jl”-, ur”r ided rh. _,in,rr’1,,,,,-T ‘It s tuugii ” I:r_d s;,icl. ..l.or. overtttlcs- lli Jrl(. “”:4″j. I),,u:. -\,lar ,n., 1 u-.,r1:. a malt l,) thu girl hc lor-es )ooking flf.”,fr”‘i_,lii i’.”; . ,, ,*.^r the u,,,1,,rn .iul.u5s lhe .1 r +r ,hlJ-l i.”” ur. a quiLkr(. ur r$… i.,.,i” taugh,t Jne lo dt itrk. -VL,r Eld,,,de. ii-].,. rins”” ill’*,i,1. r;oys came itorr o i[. sre \\.on t srop dr.inkinq Ever,,._ thlnq I \ e lu\ ed about’ .,”u complcte.Hxll.over.t. enorlE-,;, n,r,i,,rl’,)fr;l ..+,as a rolllusi so,-rl. and ,*hen rhere a {,i. rr%\’er) s sake. prill 1.ori,* l;;,i,, -and,. with, tr.uc kir,d_he”,.,u..1,,”.., .h.” _,.1VIay par r ie: sh. .tl; ,.l.nn. u(\t 5.oul hair. i,ndS.ourself toqether:. .hart. ln rhe llgg;,,,.in. ;,.”,; d.”;. Ei;.. l:”-:” ,:lTl,,,riir… rrails lngf undei. her. winq Orr FriJarl. rtr_ rrlal)-.llar’ som-e )eu’ cl oth es. Ger 5e l l,o r.. .il:”i g”hl _ rhe crowd ,.r”rrl 6,j”;.;;;,i: 1-t;.i i”Jl. l: r too. I d Ioast a chirkerr or ened o,ut. i,nd see ii u.r. ,:?:y yn.u mecririq at hc,. noLrlc rnr. cock_ rnakn I,orr I ,,1 .l?lj{ gr, liquor.. wrrs l.r.sir,r,inq Iun being nor.mai to, , r,an I havg ri’rrr: ! L 5q1nl.ltls.,llrqn goirrq r6 Smirlr’. ,;,. ;”;,_. ,. ,ui _”. llel!r c Iu,n. I Leg;r: rerreBing. “h^i,q”.i: It wc’d Iike to eo. mar.l,g i;.;,,1d.jT_ wdj .{upposed t,r n.,..U.. .1rrgtin,,i. Whu; .:j,1 i her-a hand rvir h-hors .i oeur.r.,,., t :.,:.:,,fj “I Would Il I wrnr n*o. I ; d, ; l,i I’.ill a””‘ i: i:’.’.” :’l .{J,’^’;:1″;i :Ir.o\\ u’hen :ip wiii: a Ieu. chn j ,,i Spiln O.”.. I,lr:id nl.,,t])isecl trrn,tr,,,ni,. i i..fL )y i-!T”l’.ry,r: il ff : h rtow’n rhe -sirrk. When t’o.a*..a’*”.L]TI smashed the bottles ?f “inoJ” l;: empty-handed. ^ii; ;ii;;;i ll:.::ot flobster !d.chicke. paort,. wg DIts ir)ro squar.cj oi priff It was rathrr amusing the fir.st Finall]. rhe. family canle ro ,homc. take m+ paII.I times, but soon mJ, n.l.esponsibiiitl.- iety , Father. blamed cr.er.5_rhing;; bc_ ”The T”;;,. 1roo,. chi.lcl is ii”f.. fA.?f-r”. .^iJ_

illl 0ll1l0t 0F Pnrt|tltil0il is luorth e pound of cur, ! XxxwJl[onxxs qre scieniificorry proved fsr tess irrirorins ro rhe nose'”;;;;;’;;”‘ Proved 6, ,*n,,:*-f*y .

;fu*o6gfu6, When smokers changed ro nos.e or throar_due ro smoking Pn*lp Monnrs, r”urrJ.rrtlii *-.;.rr”r..t”aredupcomplerely, svery case of irritarion of the or definitei; ;;;;;, -lront tbe fndings o! a group rsr distinguisbed drctars.

r48 F/N€R FIAYOR FAR N4OREffi

not brought on by incompatability any had no inner resources and no interests. “What she needs is a nice tittle holiday'” Loneliness was the beginning, and be- They took me to Canada, and-because more than cancer is, or hearL trouble. As a matter of fact, I really loved Tom. It eause in my loneliness I had nothing to I was not crossed or annoyed or bored, be- fall back upon, I was bereft. I had always cause evervthing was tai<en care of, and cause was loneliness that was my bete noire. mvself-I but enjov mYself-I I have known men who abandoned their been hvpersensitive and shy. Because of lra; ;;thi”s iJ i tira ao u,rt t6 do my inability to accept 1ife, or remold it’ I itopped stoooed “otfr-i”e awhile. But when I drin[ing for awl,ile. drin[ine families because they thought their wives needed a prop to brace me up and keep me ;;;; h”;; i sta-rted again. I spentmovie three drove them to drink, and women who going. whole davs. that first week, in a divorced their husbands because they – Aliohol was that prop, and although I house. triine to stave ofi temptation. The imagined that divorce and a nice juicy old discontJnt and loneliness had re- alimony wouid solve their troubles, and could go on the wag6n for awhile, I di-dn’t they wbuld stop drinking. Boys have left see how-day in and day out-I could live turned. I was irritable and touchy, and without liquor. OnIy an alcoholic can Tonr was not helping matters’ home to escnpe tyrannical parents, and girls have quit jobs they dislike4, because understand the prison of loneliness and If I was going to drink, he would take fear into which we lonely people retreat charge ot thingi he said. Then he began Ihey fancied these were the things that made them drink. For awhile the es- over a fancied slight or hurt. doline out a meager allowance to me-a In the midst of a crowd we are pitifuily sinelJ drink befole dinner, for an appe- capists might go on the wagon. But in the Iong run, ior a true alcoholic, there is no Ionely. Sometimes. lying beside Tom at tize”r. Another at bedtime, to make me night, I seemed to drown in a black abyss sleeo. Liouor that I had bought and paid reformation. of-desolation. Then I would slip out of forl^I wis furious. That was when I An aleohoiic r*-i11 always find an excuse to drink, and if it isn’t one thing it’s an- bed and tiptoe across the room to the besan hidine botties around the house- closet, to pour the drink that would bring unier the’i-rattress, behind pictures. in other. Changing situations is not the way out. The only way for an alcoholic to oblivion. with the potatoes. Tom guessed what I was up to, and the night he caught me stop drinking is to STOP-period. Many AA’s who previously blamed DINALLY relations between us leached sneaking a drink he dashed the bottle out I a breaking point. Tom never brought of mv hand. their drinking on family circumstances or unsupportable jobs are now living in people home any more, and I had become ThL next day I went home to the family- i solitary drinker. One night when he had That time they took me to the Coast. And exactly the same situations in mlich they lived when they were drinking them- destroyed all the liquor he could find, I aeain I stopped drinking. T?rey were both remembered a quart I had cached in the evervthing was Tom’s convinced ilien that eveiything cSnvinced selves to death. The only answer to the alcoholic’s problem is to change himself. coal bin. In the morning as soon as he fault. Ieft the house I crept down to the cellar, “Don’t let him get anYthing on You, A11 alcoholics are maladjusted, and unpleasant situations undoubtedly contrib- retrieved my precious bottle, and was Honey,” Dad would say. “Just,watch your clambering out of the bin when I stumstep. We’ll get you a quiet divorce, and ute to their maladjustment. But alibis you’Il come and live with us.” won’t mend matters, and when Dad sought bled. As I fell I hit my head and knocked to piace the blame for my drinking on myself out. Tom, I knew that he was being unfair. Tom telephoned at noon. When I didn’t f HAD decencv enough to protest occas- It wasn’t Tom’s fault-and it wasn’t mine. answer he became alarmed and hurried I sionaliy that it wasn’t Tom’s fault. a-nd home. He found me in the coal bin, carbv the time the trip was over I really I was the victim of a dread disease, but wanted to go back to him. at the time none of us knew that. ried me upstairs, bathed me, and put me Dad’s atti’tude illustrates a point I would I realize now that my loving parents to bed. When I came to and wePt in like to make. It isn’t people who drive us pampered me beyond reason, I was de- maudlin fashion, Tom struck me in the to drink, and it isn’t situations’ Alcoholism pendent upon them, upon mY husband, face. Then he telephoned Mother. She is a disease, not a weakness. And it is ind upon what friends I could make. I arrived during the night.

hnt fioa? F r.tut/’ ktl nake t —

darl lovely stor of :l PorqmountPictures'”KITTY” iX

‘rFeels os if you were 3moorh. itit ing beouty in when you cover ,,ji your face with Lux Soap’s ,i:i creamy lathcr and work it f.ii; i ir thoroughly,” says this -.* t-:de;il .. charming [+;,,,, ——- star. “Rinse with W,#Iwarm water, splash with $i1.;i*rY cold, pat your face dry with 6P I’ a towel. A care that wlrO”r” ii;i,’ii ln recent tests of Lux Toi- j i:’ .’.i”rLl

let Soap Active-lather faciafq tiilili actually 3 out of 4 complex- ‘i:;-:i;rii:i ions improved in a short time t t!. ti FtGHt wASrE-Soap uses vital i;’,,ir;1

war materials. Don’t waste it.

r(o rrondi 9 octf of /O 9orcea fup clse tir! :* * TRUE S 92 e

t’Poor baby,” she murmured, as she .”.: r .i :r bathed my discolored face and slipped bits of ice between my swollen lips. “What .t: TNHES ONLY TO can I do for you, darling?” “Leave me alone,” I moaned. “I want GENUINE BERUTV-SRION TYPE to die.” There was a Iamily conference, and the =sffi, next day Mother and I flew home to Dad. For several days I was desperately ill. “Ann,” said Mother one morning, .€’o *:j — ‘ “,9 $;?] ,{}F ,rs “aren’t you sorry you and Tom didn’t have i:’.11:t1: .,,.::,t ,,,,’:.i! i:. . i’.-l. a baby?” -. tl’ ‘ ,ir: I was too sick to speculate. “Oh, I don’t know. It’s too late now. I’II never live with Tom again.” ,’i,’ oi.’ tii’,.l.f i!i. ‘Ai-.,.::;,.

A few days later a big box came from Marshall Field’s. In it was a complete t’, Iayette-little shirts and booties and tiny . ‘ .-. ,,, ”t., –, .” ‘ dresses with wee tucks, sweaters and bonnets, and baby blankets. Why I cried I Complete with some ingredients don’t know-weakness perhaps. used by beouty shops on “Dad and I have arranged to take a baby from the Foundling Home,” an- costly cgld woyes nounced Mother. “We’re just borrowing her, really. We thought you’d help ui take care of her’-a little girl, Ann.” I didn’t want a baby any more than I wanted wings. ,,”Ihat’s fine,” I said. “I’d love to, Mother.” Mother patted my hand hopefully. “Then you be a good girl,” she said, “and hurry up and get well.” – My_ nerves were completely shot. I had the shakes so that I could not lift a glass to my lips. I took fruit juice through a tube, and even fruit juice nauseated me. Before I was up, the baby arrived. Mother brought her to my bed, and when that baby held out her little arms, I {elt for the first time that I had something to live for. I tried to give up drinking for Christine’s sake, and for Mother’s sake I tried to go to church on Sundays. But it wasn’t any use. I had neither the moral nor the physical strength to do what I wanted to do. Every morning I would crawl into the bathroom and pour myself half a glass oI whiskey from a bottle I kept hidden in the hamper, after which I *ould brush my_ teeth, gargle, chew a piece of gum, and smoke a cigarette. {?l,'”;Xili – -‘ rJ..,_,:, –::. . !! E. il tt htr’t:

AN ALCOHOLIC can almost always get -i-1′ liqg61′. I bullied Tom into bringi-ng me a quart, and bribed the cook foi another. The doctor had ordered some for medicinal purposes. I hid it and pretended the bottle had broken. I was seldom, during my career as an aicoholic, without |[o*, uo, can give yourself a perfectly liquor. To get it, I wept, lied, and threw mad tantrums-but I got it. exquisite, cold permanent wave at home, Finally I became better. An alcohojic in only 2 to 3 hours. Think of it ! . . . only 2 to 3 hours I Just do this: put your usually does after illness. For a -whiie hair up in “CHIC” De Luxe curlers . . . dab each curl with the amazing I even went on the wagon. That was “CHIC” Quick-Wave solution… and almost before you know it, you have a when Mother, in an efiort to save mv marriage, suggested that I take Christine and gorgeous, crowning halo of beautiful, soft, natural looking curls and waves. go back to Tom. A “CHIC” De Luxe Cold Wave is safe to use on all types of hair. . . For six weeks after I went home I didn’t fine, medium, coarse . . . bleached or dyed. Excellent, too, for children,s take a drink (this is usual after illness), hair. Remember, “CHIC” De Luxe is a genuine, beauty salon-type cold and everything was fine. Tom fell in love wave with the same ingredients used on costly cold permanent waves. with Christine as soon as he saw her. If she had been our own little girl, it would A “CHIC” De Luxe cold permanent lasts for months and months. have been impossibie for either of us to GTT”(HIC”DE tUXt AT love her more. Everybody loved the child, including the Eldredgls-and May AtL DRUG.. DIPARTMEiIT..VARIEIY..5 AND lOc SIORIS took to coming to the house again. Whitl Christine was having her afternoon nap, if you connot get “CHIC” De luxe or we would have a few drihks. And befoie -CHlC” Reguldr ot your deoler, orCer di.ect. long I was up to my old tricks. ‘THE LINHALL CO., Dept. 135, Sr. Paul 1, Minn, For years Tom had tried to make me ] chic Resutor PERMANENT wAvE Klr Please send me: stop drinking, and succeeded only in rub- You can also give your- ( ) “CHIC” De Luxe Permanent Wave. Prie 79c bing me the wrong way. He did not know selt a perfecrly beautiful ( ) “CHIC’ Regulir Permanent Wave. price )9c petmanen! *,ave q,irh the then that alcoholism is a disease; that an “CHIC Home comolele Send C.O.D. (lf clicck or money ordcr is en.losedalcoholic is a very sick person who cannot t(rr ln 6_Regular to 8 hours- all postage charges are prepaid.,1 be reasoned with. Nagging, of course, is “CH lC” Regular is on sale at srores wore than useless. Indeed, the first tenet listed above, which also feature of AA is that no one can make an alcoholic l “CHIC” De Luxe Home Kirs. stop drinking. I

CONFESSIONS 93

PbS” I u,as firsi told that I ,”vas an al_ eoholic, I was horrifieA. it *i, ,-*””r*, she explair-red, and all my resentful feelh’orn the adupl.iurr agenc) ,uho rota ,,re. rngs were unconscious disobedience to that law. As I grew stronger.. she brought Nlorhcr realiied tnit ;i jo,l” ..rri”d – a Iawyer who had been iheavy drinkler. straight.en rne out it was “, Chrlstin”. Sh; and he, loo. sat b5 rn1. becJ and talked suggested that u,e adopt the ehild bui And rhe thirrgs irc said lnadc s.nsc. adoption is a long drarvn-out process. ”Drini:ing never. solves a problerr_.it onl5, nrakes rnaiters u,orse.” I thought of w fil *””T,?ilr Tf:’i:t tirt ouS{h .,:,,?”;””,J; rouLit,r ,,i u,rsl,,1ior..!- Christine. and tears rolled cheeks. “Alcoholics are dor,r.,rl rnv allersicr ic, .lrini< sunr il,d.Ilre *rrgi”, ur other’ p6uple iu.e allelgit- to t.er.lairr ctgaretre_arrrl imagrr,”d t[21 1 foods. tci dusi. or. fiower.s. flrele isn’t erliv had nr.vse’lf s.rislactr,, rl., Tom cur-e.Jor an alcoholic. excel:l just stopl dl'(, .acquirted. [ \’;cle college graciuates. Orrr roitrl ir:_ (a,!ue wai rrtur r thi,rt $l 5.00t, ii lilllg. -Wherr lrad an atii.active hor.ne. and .r.car wr- I r.r.as sti.or:ge.:: I g.ent. for. a littie lr,ure ,:b- ‘*,l-rilc. tc lir.e -wirL -rhe nurse. She harl vi_ousl1, dgvoted ic :he bal;;., 1&.6 rvished rr, sei’erai frienrls .shr: u,er.c alcc;holics. .rr-lcl adopt., That. it seenrecl .ici me, was iliel carrit.ufterr ru cail. -\fier. I tr,.rri ro rnake ilq quL,d uar.enr.(. Bil il.,”rlorgh adoi- honre. Ieelii-rg n-mch slronger’. shc asked liun .rqor141 thougltr .rherri’isc. if I would go tr; ihe hospiral ro visi.i: other. “Y, -. ,9 . . fhe i e}.,rrt rearl. .;r lthouglr Pond’s “Lips” sbay on… rn llrlelliperrt dt)d surnetitrres clrarming alcoholics as she had r,.isited rne. Thc firsi. {:ime I rrent. I was filled wiih tl-re pel’son, is unflt lo be awarded legal cusl o1d shyness that furnished ihe ‘,reason,, tody of a chiId.” for mr, first drinking. But the sigh.i of Outraged. r.r’e appealed to the courts. (.\rer’\’ r’leu a jt,oh,,lil was an objeci iesson. A stelrr iudgr.hear.C nut srory. and I. soon en.i,’\.ed qoil)s. lvlr- visii,s ”The sociai u,or.ker.., I told’ hirn earnserveci I dual pur.post heloirrg otlrer.s estly. “came to m5. house in thc aftelnoon I rvas helpinc m-u-self. -lrr. aftel I’d lrad a leu’ cocktails. a,roil”rl ”Yor: nrusl ,r:o.i,I 1o quit.,r’r-Ir- ne\\. lime she came in the evening. I admit. friends lold me. “becauie God – never Yuul Hon’r’. rhal I had been “clrinkins. r forces-ariy,one to do His rvii1. His help is highl,all oJ t\ o. Sometiui.s sh. ir., availabie. but rnust be sought in earnestthe mor.ning. She saw me bathe “rm’. t*”.i .ness and humilitl’.” the babl’. She knou,s that the””a child ii I fo-Lrnd that )r5 placirrg rn1. lifv in rveil-cared for-*that my husband ancl i ^ .sno.n Gotl’s.hands di],. and askinc Him aclore lrer’. But that ..r’oman has accused rne of being an alcohcrlic. Whv. your i’, helli rne “r.er’.’ {o he a scber. woman {or twenty-four hrttirs. I rvas able to do His Honor’. I l,ate r.he taste ,,f liqtr,,r | ‘I clrink will Gu<l is all-lor’.ing arrd all-for.eivirrr. because I ar-r ioneil.’ and niiserable. be- arr<l I krruu tha{ He ri,ill n,r ler nre down. cause il is rht. on15. wa5. I can keep gc,ing. I knorv that I cannot cure rnvself. and When u,e adupi Chli”iine. ihiries’;ill b”e tliat doctors cannot cul.e me.” thai mv rliffe|enl. When she i5 mv o,*,rr – strength must corne frorn God. and tha”t T}e iudge lusrled thr paees of r r.ol- u,ith,’ut Him. I am helpless r,nd aio:rc. urninous report” “Adoption denied.,, he said. -FHERE ale llo secl.eis abr,ur AA. and we and- on… Tom say-s I fainted. AI1 I lemember is a r ;.re nor.an overlr. r.eligious group. We feeling of desolation-of utter. teuible, hre haup.\’ l)ccause we har.e found friends lo_neiiness-a feeling of being caged. who understand us. No one but an alco- When I carlre to. I w1s in a hos-pirai ini holic can realll’ undersland an alcoholic. all alound me w’as lonelirress_ Clelgymen are oflen censorious. )oving Tom had taken me home and called a wonren weep arrd nag. men curse theii doctor. Theu he went to a drugstore for blotlrels out -but u.e rvho i:ar-e been ,rredicine. While he was pone, i nartialhl lecor er.cd rn]- senses. and fc,rrnj , torrle c,I thlough the mill understand one another. liquor. Belore he carne back I had fin_ A member of AA r,r,rote a little ver.se called “About Love” that was read at one ished it and passed out. Ttrey took melo ol our. tecenl meetings. AA s )augheti the hospital ir-r an ambuiancc. For eiays’I u’hen rhey hear.d ir-bur ir’s rhe rruih: rvas honibly sick. and underneath ord .,r, top of the nausea wer€ \,aves of loneliness The uon.rlerful loxe of a beautiful thal tvashed ovpl tl:o iike lhc sea. yttid. One dav a \t,oma!t came and sat bv rnv Tlr.e lor:e of a statr.nch true ntun, bed. . If I realll’ wanied io stop dririking A,,r/ rl,c lot.e o{ a bo,b1t aJraid I could. she said. Thei.e *’a-. an ansu,.er to Ha:re aa:isted since li_-le be{)an. tnr. probient. There ..i.as a r.er;redv that But.tite greotest lore-the late of rca)15’rtor’ke,i. She rvas , 3r..dtrar* ltrrrsr. lc r: e .s* slrl said. Ar,r lrilc ago she had rrralr jed Et:et,. grea.ter tliol i/r.ct ol a rtmtl.ter., and had childr.en. Tir”n she’d starled r,l Is lte tender. possiolate. infitzi,te late drink. For filieen years she drank. She lost lrer husJ:and. hel chilcfu.en ancl her Of one dnurkeii. buni fot’ tntotlre r. re and on ! home. The3, put her in an insiitulion. anri On Au_gust l4th I rl’iil be 35 ;’ears old. there. ^at last. she found the ren:edy. I and on that da-,v Tom l-ras prornised to Eo could find it too, she said. And if i wi;hed. \{ ilh nre io the Judge rvho said *” couid slrc rvould irelp mc. Dav al,ter rl-v slre not have Christine. I rvant to tell him i’ame iind sat br- rrr\ bed irc,,v m1, }loliest irttempt to practice a }aw Later I rvas to lear.n that ml doctor had uf love has cleansed rnc, 6*,.{**[r$9′ sen1, {ol her’. Al rnarrr. hosiritals wher.e iricohoircs ar.e taken ro..dr], uul” a phv_ I u,i’ll sa1-. Youl Honor.. I am no lr,neeir,v.ak and l,’nelr. l>ur fir not. 1o bi a mother io the baby I love.” And the (W;”ril1u,ttr sician ol cler.g1,n-ian contacti a rrrernbir. of AA lo talk to r.et:rtir.sefu] patients. _ Al fir.st I only listened- half-heartedlv. Judge. I hope. rvill give me Chr.istine for my own By and irv. I talked a Iittle to hei.. God lrad forsakerr nrc. I rr.*pl He Irad takeir arvay my babv. ”Btrt vou ar c cotlip.ielgi\ uul n[ If _vorr know someone who honestl.r, 6 sutt;ptirss sbtdes lou(.]r 491,loi. ?/*: tttx ivith God.” shc said- Y,ru h:rr, doric wants to conquer the liquor habit, ‘ihings-oI your- own rveakness opposed to ..”.Trytl:e*u,tst rell him-cr her-about Alcoholics God’s hol,v u,ili.” Pond’s “Lips” shade- Anonymous, P.0. Box 459. Grand “Beau Bait’ Sl:e said that I tnusi subrr-ril rnrr. weak -rich, wili to God. and let Him handle mv di{- Centtal Annex, New York, N. Y. round rosy-crirnsol ficu1ties. God’s law was the Law ol”Lcve. 84 rRUE