[00:00:00 – 00:00:01] Morning, folks.

[00:00:01 – 00:00:02] Tom, an alcoholic.

[00:00:02 – 00:00:05] I’m delighted to see you.

[00:00:05 – 00:00:09] I’m a member of the Primary Purpose group of AA in Southern Pines, North Carolina.

[00:00:09 – 00:00:11] And I am delighted to be here and, uh…

[00:00:11 – 00:00:16] Well, I won’t even go into it.

[00:00:16 – 00:00:22] Tell you one thing, it’ll test your spiritual program to be doing an AA meeting in Whiskey Pete’s, by golly.

[00:00:22 – 00:00:27] I look like Whiskey Pete kicked in on me this morning.

[00:00:27 – 00:00:33] I see my reputation got ahead of me a little bit that I, a bad drinker.

[00:00:33 – 00:00:38] This is Tom Smallwood’s book.

[00:00:38 – 00:00:40] Nobody here could lift it but Calvin.

[00:00:40 – 00:00:43] And heavy-duty thing.

[00:00:43 – 00:00:51] Oh, let me, uh, uh, other than just thanking you for a great conference, uh, it’s been just a super, super deal.

[00:00:51 – 00:01:00] And, uh, give you a little bit of a, of a clue about how I want to take off with this is, is today.

[00:01:00 – 00:01:03] Uh, number one, I really do want to thank you guys for this.

[00:01:03 – 00:01:08] It, uh, this, this, I, I think it genuinely is, like my buddy said, it g- genuinely is a unique conference.

[00:01:08 – 00:01:15] I’ve been to a ton of them, but this is the only one I’ve seen that was built entirely around the Steps.

[00:01:15 – 00:01:21] And, uh, another thing that was u- unique about it, the youngest speaker was 30 years sober.

[00:01:21 – 00:01:25] Man, this was a geriatric display.

[00:01:25 – 00:01:29] I got you …

[00:01:29 – 00:01:37] And, and, and what, what assembled was some of the best who did some of their very best.

[00:01:37 – 00:01:38] That, that’s just outstanding.

[00:01:38 – 00:01:39] Outstanding work.

[00:01:39 – 00:01:42] And, uh, I was just honored to be in the middle of that.

[00:01:42 – 00:01:52] I I came down, the reason I’m huffing, I guess not huffing in the usual sense, but- It’s just the reason I’m panting a little.

[00:01:52 – 00:01:55] I got all the way to the door and realized I didn’t have my notes.

[00:01:55 – 00:01:59] What I had was my bill from the Rio in Las Vegas.

[00:01:59 – 00:02:06] What happens at the Rio in Las Vegas stays at the Rio in Las Vegas.

[00:02:06 – 00:02:14] Uh, I had to go back and climb 10 f- floors of stairs.

[00:02:14 – 00:02:16] That’s a lie.

[00:02:16 – 00:02:18] Wooed me out riding the elevator.

[00:02:18 – 00:02:25] Uh, I, I, I want to, want to express appreciation to the folk at where…

[00:02:25 – 00:02:29] I know Bob and I were riding by this place one day and, and he was on…

[00:02:29 – 00:02:31] I couldn’t imagine him being on a cell phone.

[00:02:31 – 00:02:36] Uh, we’re thinking about starting a special project to give him a cell phone implant- …

[00:02:36 – 00:02:38] so he, so he won’t have to pick it up.

[00:02:38 – 00:02:44] But he was on the phone with this facility talking about this conference, and now we’re here in fruition.

[00:02:44 – 00:02:56] So I appreciate that great work, uh, from, from not only Bob and the Las Vegas crowd, but Palmdale, LA, a bunch of folks around that germinated this idea, and then supported it big time.

[00:02:56 – 00:02:59] So it’s just great to see this and great to be here for the fruition.

[00:02:59 – 00:03:04] Uh, t- I’ll tell you what I want to do.

[00:03:04 – 00:03:05] I’ve t-…

[00:03:05 – 00:03:10] Uh, one of the few advantages of being old is you get to meet some of the old historic figures in AA.

[00:03:10 – 00:03:12] One of them was Sam Shoemaker.

[00:03:12 – 00:03:15] And Sam Shoemaker was a wonderful friend.

[00:03:15 – 00:03:20] He was a, a minister of some stripe and a great friend of AA.

[00:03:20 – 00:03:26] And he described our fellowship as shirt sleeves Christianity or shirt sleeves spirituality.

[00:03:26 – 00:03:31] And, uh, and it was a good apt description of, of, that, that he, that, that he observed.

[00:03:31 – 00:03:35] And today, I, I want to, I want to…

[00:03:35 – 00:03:37] I think I’ve got about two jobs here.

[00:03:37 – 00:03:46] This has been a high energy, high level, a very, very skillful, beautifully presented program.

[00:03:46 – 00:03:52] And, and, uh, you couldn’t help getting pumped up pretty high with, with this caliber of stuff.

[00:03:52 – 00:03:56] And my job is to get it dumbed down a little.

[00:03:56 – 00:03:59] I got, I got…

[00:03:59 – 00:04:01] Some of y’all will be on I-5 before long.

[00:04:01 – 00:04:08] And, uh, I got to get you prepared to go back out there in that world and be ready to, to practice road rage and all that kind of stuff.

[00:04:08 – 00:04:16] If you leave here too blissfully supreme and, and you may get knocked out, you know.

[00:04:16 – 00:04:18] So anyway, I want to get you prepared.

[00:04:18 – 00:04:26] And, uh, and I want to, I want to approach this in a way that, as Sam Sho- Shoemaker called it, shirt sleeves spirituality.

[00:04:26 – 00:04:33] I, I think those, these last three steps, I want to approach it as, as sort of the spiritual life in combat boots.

[00:04:33 – 00:04:41] Uh, I, I want to not get into the poetic very much and not get into a lot of ritual worship or anything like that.

[00:04:41 – 00:04:52] I, I want to, I want to sort of take a look at those steps not only because I like to do it that way, but because I think it’s somewhat the, the, the message of those last three steps.

[00:04:52 – 00:04:56] And I’ll tell you what I mean.

[00:04:56 – 00:04:59] But I’ll tell you one of the things, though, we can just kind of relax and enjoy it.

[00:04:59 – 00:05:04] Uh, I’m gonna quit.

[00:05:04 – 00:05:10] I probably won’t be finished, but I’m gonna quit at 11 o’clock or…

[00:05:10 – 00:05:12] Well, I don’t have to say or now.

[00:05:12 – 00:05:13] It’d be 11 o’clock.

[00:05:13 – 00:05:17] I was gonna say or two hours, whichever comes first, but 11’s gonna come first.

[00:05:17 – 00:05:21] So I’ll either quit when I finish or no later- Than 11 o’clock.

[00:05:21 – 00:05:25] And, um, so we can just kind of relax and enjoy.

[00:05:25 – 00:05:35] So what I want to do is just kind of visit with these three steps in the style of action, in the style of putting this program to work as a way of life.

[00:05:35 – 00:05:45] In, uh, in ten, 11, 12, I think we start talking about a word that we rarely talk about around here, is a word called leadership.

[00:05:45 – 00:05:48] And leadership is not a dirty word.

[00:05:48 – 00:05:49] It’s not an inappropriate word.

[00:05:49 – 00:05:57] It’s an extremely important, valid word to describe some of the responsibilities that we have in AA if we’re going to be responsible members.

[00:05:57 – 00:06:03] And so leadership is, uh, a very important aspect of AA service.

[00:06:03 – 00:06:04] You see it in a lot of faces.

[00:06:04 – 00:06:07] Sponsorship is leadership.

[00:06:07 – 00:06:15] Uh, taking on the responsibilities to put this idea into fruition and make it come into a great conference, that’s leadership.

[00:06:15 – 00:06:17] And without it, nothing happens.

[00:06:17 – 00:06:22] So I want to visit in that area and talk about leadership as it comes out of those steps.

[00:06:22 – 00:06:29] And, uh, so let me get going.

[00:06:29 – 00:06:31] In the…

[00:06:31 – 00:06:36] To kind of lead into that, just think a minute about the promises.

[00:06:36 – 00:06:37] I won’t read them.

[00:06:37 – 00:06:42] But those promises are kind of an interesting piece of our book.

[00:06:42 – 00:06:53] They describe what sounds like almost an idyllic existence, you know, that if we, if we do these actions, some things will happen that are beyond belief to, to a first-time observer.

[00:06:53 – 00:07:05] And what it says at the end of those is that these things happen, that we will be amazed, right at the beginning of it, says we’ll be amazed before we’re halfway through.

[00:07:05 – 00:07:11] And we don’t have to finish the amends process to start realizing the promises in our lives.

[00:07:11 – 00:07:13] We’ll be amazed before we’re halfway through.

[00:07:13 – 00:07:19] And it lists a whole range of things that defy imagination, and those things are really true.

[00:07:19 – 00:07:22] And then right after the…

[00:07:22 – 00:07:25] I’m not gonna read a whole lot to you because I memorized the whole book.

[00:07:25 – 00:07:30] I do lie a little.

[00:07:30 – 00:07:34] But I, uh, I just read this, this little…

[00:07:34 – 00:07:37] There’s not a whole lot of reading to do with, with step 10.

[00:07:37 – 00:07:39] Uh, but I won’t read the whole deal.

[00:07:39 – 00:07:49] I’ll, uh, I-I’ll just read the introduction into, uh, into 10 and a little bit of, of what catches the flavor that I want to get at.

[00:07:49 – 00:07:55] So we’re through with those promises, and, and it says these, these things are gonna happen.

[00:07:55 – 00:07:56] They’re being fulfilled all the time.

[00:07:56 – 00:08:00] And they’ll m-materialize if we work for them.

[00:08:00 – 00:08:11] And then it, and it says, “This thought brings us to step 10, which suggests we continue to take a personal inventory, continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along.

[00:08:11 – 00:08:16] We vigorously commence this way of living as we clear, cleared up, cleaned up the past.

[00:08:16 – 00:08:21] We have entered the world of the spirit.” Now, listen close to this part.

[00:08:21 – 00:08:28] “We’ve entered the world of the spirit.” Yeah, what we’ve just gotten through with is fundamental surrender and hope in first three steps.

[00:08:28 – 00:08:32] We’ve looked at, at understanding what alcoholism’s about, how desperate the condition is.

[00:08:32 – 00:08:34] We’ve opened up to another human.

[00:08:34 – 00:08:38] We’ve made that, that tremendous decision in six and seven for new life.

[00:08:38 – 00:08:42] In eight and nine, we’ve gone back and started to repair some of the damage.

[00:08:42 – 00:08:45] And so now we move into a different d-dimension.

[00:08:45 – 00:08:48] It says, “We continue to take personal inventory.

[00:08:48 – 00:08:52] We vigorously, uh, set right our mistakes.

[00:08:52 – 00:08:55] We commence this way of living as we cleaned up the past.

[00:08:55 – 00:09:01] But now we have entered the world of the spirit.” This next sentence is a g- a real good one for me.

[00:09:01 – 00:09:08] “Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness.

[00:09:08 – 00:09:10] It’s not an overnight matter.

[00:09:10 – 00:09:12] It should continue for our lifetime.” And we’ll go back to that in just a minute.

[00:09:12 – 00:09:16] “Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, fear.

[00:09:16 – 00:09:23] When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them.” Then listen to the action.

[00:09:23 – 00:09:40] “We discuss them with someone and immediately take, uh, and immediately and make amends quickly if we’ve harmed someone.” We don’t go into Freudian analysis or deep think tank stuff.

[00:09:40 – 00:09:42] Uh, uh, we don’t labor over it.

[00:09:42 – 00:09:44] You know, we, we, we get restored to life.

[00:09:44 – 00:09:45] We don’t, we don’t transcend life.

[00:09:45 – 00:09:46] We get restored to life.

[00:09:46 – 00:09:49] And, and, and it has its bumps and things.

[00:09:49 – 00:09:59] And so when we get into some screwball thing, we take care of it quickly before it turns into the resentment that, that Sandy was talking about so well the other night, uh, uh, Friday night.

[00:09:59 – 00:10:01] So we deal with that very quickly.

[00:10:01 – 00:10:08] And then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help.

[00:10:08 – 00:10:10] Love and tolerance of others is our code.

[00:10:10 – 00:10:19] And I think that’s the, the tone of these steps, that certainly we goof, but we don’t spend the rest of our lives staring at our navel, navel in inventory.

[00:10:19 – 00:10:22] You know, what we do is get on with the business of living.

[00:10:22 – 00:10:28] And as we live, we’ve got corrective measures available to us, but we don’t waste a lot of time on that.

[00:10:28 – 00:10:33] What we do is immediately turn ourselves, our, our attention to, to, to how we can be of help to others.

[00:10:33 – 00:10:36] And so that’s the, the theme a lo- of a lot of step 10 to me.

[00:10:36 – 00:10:39] That gears us up for action.

[00:10:39 – 00:10:43] Le-let me talk just a little- A little, little– well, you, you don’t have much choice.

[00:10:43 – 00:10:47] You could leave, but You know I’m gonna talk about it anyway.

[00:10:47 – 00:10:48] The, uh…

[00:10:48 – 00:10:56] Let me talk a little bit about that, that, uh, that thing about growing and understanding effectiveness.

[00:10:56 – 00:10:59] That, that can be like a throwaway kind of cliché-sounding thing.

[00:10:59 – 00:11:02] But I think there’s a heavy message in that.

[00:11:02 – 00:11:14] You know, that now that I’ve gotten through dealing with this, this sort of self-centered condition, I now shift my focus to, to, to a strange expression of selfishness.

[00:11:14 – 00:11:17] This is the weirdest selfishness in the world.

[00:11:17 – 00:11:21] It’s about ten percent gimme and about ninety percent give.

[00:11:21 – 00:11:30] And if we don’t learn that elusive secret, we miss the whole deal because we learn that it’s in helping others that we strengthen and we gain our greatest rewards.

[00:11:30 – 00:11:35] And so now we look, look to, to understanding ineffectiveness.

[00:11:35 – 00:11:35] Now, what does that mean?

[00:11:35 – 00:11:50] I, I wanna give you some examples of what I wrote earlier this morning in, um, in understanding ineffectiveness and looking at the terrain that, that we’re in.

[00:11:50 – 00:11:52] Wanna visit a few of these things.

[00:11:52 – 00:12:01] And it’s not to react in alarm or dismay or chagrin or any of that.

[00:12:01 – 00:12:05] It’s just to develop understanding of the problems I observe.

[00:12:05 – 00:12:12] As I get through with the critical care of Tom I, it’s time to start taking a responsible place in the world, so I wanna g- have some understanding.

[00:12:12 – 00:12:17] It’s not enough to have alarm or concern.

[00:12:17 – 00:12:22] So I wanna, I wanna h- be able to understand things I see.

[00:12:22 – 00:12:24] I’ll, I’ll give you a couple examples.

[00:12:24 – 00:12:27] I was in a, a– Some of you probably read it.

[00:12:27 – 00:12:31] A conference report came out, uh, maybe three or four years ago, something like that.

[00:12:31 – 00:12:33] I was in an area office at the time.

[00:12:33 – 00:12:48] And for the first time in my history in AA, which goes back almost forty-nine years, for the first time in that history, every number that we track in this fellowship was down.

[00:12:48 – 00:12:51] Every number that we track.

[00:12:51 – 00:12:59] And I’m talking about numbers of groups, numbers of members, literature sales, Grapevine.

[00:12:59 – 00:13:02] Everything that we count was down.

[00:13:02 – 00:13:08] Well, that’s kind of a startling thing to hear when you’ve never heard anything but up.

[00:13:08 – 00:13:15] Not all of a sudden, but now we observe that things are going down.

[00:13:15 – 00:13:19] Last year, I think, I was up in Chicago with…

[00:13:19 – 00:13:21] And, uh, she had…

[00:13:21 – 00:13:23] Sandy and I were doing a workshop in, in Chicago.

[00:13:23 – 00:13:34] And we had a, a panel, and the, the panel was made up of a Class A trust, uh, non-alcoholic Class A trustee, trustee-at-large, and, uh, two, two delegates.

[00:13:34 – 00:13:36] And they were a very well-informed group.

[00:13:36 – 00:13:39] So I, I, I don’t normally go to the mic unless you, unless I’m invited.

[00:13:39 – 00:13:41] I stay out of n-enough.

[00:13:41 – 00:13:43] And so I don’t, I don’t usually do it.

[00:13:43 – 00:13:44] But I, I just…

[00:13:44 – 00:13:45] It was too good an opportunity.

[00:13:45 – 00:13:56] So I just stood up and I said, “I’d like to ask a question about sorta how are we doing?” And, and I just cited what I just cited to you and said, “How about telling me how we’re doing now?

[00:13:56 – 00:14:04] Are we better, worse, or same?” The, the non-alcoholic trustee b- almost ran to the mic.

[00:14:04 – 00:14:06] He was anxious to talk about that.

[00:14:06 – 00:14:10] And, and, and what he shared, I wish I could tell you was good news.

[00:14:10 – 00:14:14] But he’s a well-informed man, extremely well-informed man.

[00:14:14 – 00:14:23] He said, “I wish I could tell you it’s up, but every number is down further or the same.” Well, in the real world, folks, you’d call that a recession.

[00:14:23 – 00:14:25] There’d be a lot of alarm about that.

[00:14:25 – 00:14:29] But it tends to be sort of unnoticed here that…

[00:14:29 – 00:14:29] But those are…

[00:14:29 – 00:14:34] In things of understanding, you gotta have the information to have some understanding.

[00:14:34 – 00:14:37] And, and that’s a big concern.

[00:14:37 – 00:14:39] And so what do you do about that?

[00:14:39 – 00:14:42] I don’t think you have to start having revival meetings or anything like that.

[00:14:42 – 00:14:49] But having some understanding and knowing the problem creates, it generally creates some willingness to try to do something about it.

[00:14:49 – 00:14:57] Important thing to know, the numbers are down, first time in history, and they’re not getting better as far as I can tell right now.

[00:14:57 – 00:14:59] I’m concerned about that.

[00:14:59 – 00:15:01] I hope you’re concerned about that.

[00:15:01 – 00:15:08] I could go on for, uh, many other examples of what that reflects like in our relationship with the worlds around us.

[00:15:08 – 00:15:10] You, you could, you could find a lot of other things to have some concern.

[00:15:10 – 00:15:12] But in understanding.

[00:15:12 – 00:15:14] And then ineffectiveness.

[00:15:14 – 00:15:16] You know, what is it that we do?

[00:15:16 – 00:15:20] I did a panel at a con– that I was, a conference I was involved in.

[00:15:20 – 00:15:23] Did a panel on effectiveness.

[00:15:23 – 00:15:32] It was the first panel in the memory of any person at the conference that they’d ever been into in AA that was about effectiveness.

[00:15:32 – 00:15:34] We don’t tend to deal with that a lot.

[00:15:34 – 00:15:43] You know, we tend to be people who treat something, if we do it once, it becomes a sacred tradition, and we do it forever.

[00:15:43 – 00:15:45] It doesn’t make a difference whether it works or not.

[00:15:45 – 00:15:47] We just keep on doing it.

[00:15:47 – 00:15:49] You almost routinize everything.

[00:15:49 – 00:15:53] And, uh, so that’s the way we are.

[00:15:53 – 00:15:55] Give you an example of that.

[00:15:55 – 00:16:01] I was, um, I was, uh, a while back, I was asked to come up and do an A…

[00:16:02 – 00:16:08] anniversary meeting at a, at a place at Princeton University, a very enlightened, so-sophisticated place, home, home of Princeton University.

[00:16:08 – 00:16:11] It, that’s a real, real, uh, outstanding community.

[00:16:11 – 00:16:21] And, and the, the meeting I was to– The anniversary was a group that had been formed for the express purpose of dealing with people who had been mandated into Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:16:21 – 00:16:29] And the motivation was they thought these folks just tended to, to get a, a sort of a shuffle around rather than a good, meaningful kind of welcome to AA.

[00:16:29 – 00:16:33] So they formed this group to provide a special environment to welcome them in.

[00:16:33 – 00:16:35] Good, good, good intent.

[00:16:35 – 00:16:44] So I’m chatting with the two founders of the group before the meeting, and I said, “Well, tell me how it’s going.” And, uh, one of them said, “Oh yeah, going great, man.

[00:16:44 – 00:16:46] Man, we got people here all the time.

[00:16:46 – 00:16:47] We got folks here every week.

[00:16:47 – 00:16:50] Going good.” And the other fellow said, “Wait a minute.

[00:16:50 – 00:17:17] What do you mean by that?” I said, “I mean, how’s it going in terms of do you pe-see people that you work with in this group moving on into recovery?” And the two guys looked at each other with sort of blank stares and said, “Do you know anybody?” And the other guy said, “No.” “I don’t either.” Now, come on, guys, give me a break.

[00:17:17 – 00:17:28] Eleven years in a far above average community, I don’t care what you’re selling, if you don’t make a sale in eleven years- You better take a look.

[00:17:28 – 00:17:28] You’re…

[00:17:28 – 00:17:31] Something bad wrong.

[00:17:31 – 00:17:33] You know, good effort isn’t enough.

[00:17:33 – 00:17:39] You know, it’s a, it’s a presenting question about, you know, do– Is what I do an effective thing?

[00:17:39 – 00:17:41] And I think that’s the message this step.

[00:17:41 – 00:17:51] Now when I start thinking of others, rather than just reacting in dismay and discouragement, it’s, it’s important for me to take a look at whether that can be done better.

[00:17:51 – 00:18:00] And by the way, that’s the thing that troubled me enough, not just that one example, but it troubled me enough that in my little community, we decided to tackle that.

[00:18:00 – 00:18:08] And we have indeed eliminated mandated paper signing meetings in our, in our community and replaced it with a better, with a better deal.

[00:18:08 – 00:18:14] So there, there, the, the, the concern about that can learn to understand and can lead to effectiveness.

[00:18:14 – 00:18:24] That’s just one example of a, of a, of a thing of, of, of being s-alert to the, to the, to the quality of, of work that we’re doing and the effectiveness of it because we don’t want to waste our time.

[00:18:24 – 00:18:26] God, nobody does.

[00:18:26 – 00:18:28] But it, it’s very important to take a look at that thing.

[00:18:28 – 00:18:30] Um…

[00:18:30 – 00:18:35] I don’t know who wrote these notes, but they’re just awful.

[00:18:35 – 00:18:37] Thank you.

[00:18:37 – 00:18:41] That’s…

[00:18:41 – 00:18:45] Okay, yeah.

[00:18:45 – 00:18:46] I finally found it.

[00:18:46 – 00:18:49] The revolving door.

[00:18:49 – 00:18:54] Uh, uh, probably not a person in this room doesn’t have some active concern about the revolving door.

[00:18:54 – 00:19:05] And what I’m talking about is that we have huge numbers of people come to AA, and we have it looks like about an equal number leaving or maybe more because our numbers are down.

[00:19:05 – 00:19:11] You know, so I’ve, I’ve been concerned for many years about this whole business of the revolving door.

[00:19:11 – 00:19:15] You know, I, I think very few people come to AA prematurely.

[00:19:15 – 00:19:20] I think most people come here at, as, as the court of last resort.

[00:19:20 – 00:19:28] And, and just to demonize the guy who walks in as, well, he wasn’t ready or he didn’t want it or all that, that’s not a good enough answer for me.

[00:19:28 – 00:19:31] You know, I’ve got to take a look at the quality of what I’m doing.

[00:19:31 – 00:19:39] How, how, how well do I accommodate that person in AA and give them a, a solid introduction to what this program is about?

[00:19:39 – 00:19:43] That’s what I have to do if I want to improve in understanding and effectiveness.

[00:19:43 – 00:19:45] I looked at that for a long time.

[00:19:45 – 00:19:53] I started doing a thing– Now I’m not gonna tell you any of my bad stuff, but I’ve, I’ve got a lot of goose I could, I could really regale you with.

[00:19:53 – 00:19:58] But I’m gonna talk about the W column instead of the, the other one.

[00:19:58 – 00:20:00] Uh, so what do you do about a thing like that?

[00:20:00 – 00:20:03] I started looking around for things that I thought might work.

[00:20:03 – 00:20:11] And I, uh, I stumbled into a thing called Big Book Workshops, and some of us are, are aficionados of that activity.

[00:20:11 – 00:20:23] And, and, and so what I saw in that thing, it looked like there was an element of realism and, and, and real connection that went a step beyond just the average, average meeting.

[00:20:23 – 00:20:25] So I just decided to do one.

[00:20:25 – 00:20:26] I didn’t know how.

[00:20:26 – 00:20:27] I’d never been to one.

[00:20:27 – 00:20:28] But what the heck?

[00:20:28 – 00:20:29] I mean, you got a book.

[00:20:29 – 00:20:30] I mean, what more you need?

[00:20:30 – 00:20:34] And so I said, “Shoot, I’m gonna do it.” And I got a, a, a buddy on the phone.

[00:20:34 – 00:20:35] We talked about it.

[00:20:35 – 00:20:36] Did one.

[00:20:36 – 00:20:43] And, uh, first one I did was, uh, what we were doing was going through exhaustively through every line in the book.

[00:20:43 – 00:20:46] Wear you flat out.

[00:20:46 – 00:20:55] I’m, I’m telling you, it- Last one I did, did, uh, the last ex– Long-term one I did took eighteen months.

[00:20:55 – 00:20:59] God knows, I thought I was gonna get a watch or something when we got through with that.

[00:20:59 – 00:21:00] And I, I…

[00:21:00 – 00:21:02] That was a long time.

[00:21:02 – 00:21:06] I know we have incredible attention spans, but that’s stretching it a little bit.

[00:21:06 – 00:21:09] So it was just too labor-intensive.

[00:21:09 – 00:21:16] It was just taking too much time, and if you got a lot of things you wanna get done, you can’t just tie down to one thing and make it a, a career.

[00:21:16 – 00:21:20] And so I just finished one last week, as a matter of fact, that we did in fourteen weeks.

[00:21:20 – 00:21:23] And, uh, I, I t- I really love the format.

[00:21:23 – 00:21:30] I love the 14 weeks, but my question is gonna be, and time will tell, does it have equal effectiveness?

[00:21:30 – 00:21:35] And expediting the process is not a satisfactory thing if it’s not effective.

[00:21:35 – 00:21:44] But that was an enormously effect– I’ll tell you how effective it was, and I’m, I’m nervous every time I say this, but I say it because it’s God’s truth.

[00:21:44 – 00:21:52] Not a single person who has gone through that entire process has ever drunk again, and I’ve been doing them for several years.

[00:21:52 – 00:21:54] Not a single one.

[00:21:54 – 00:21:56] Now, I don’t think that’s the magic bullet.

[00:21:56 – 00:21:59] I don’t think there’s anything radically new about that.

[00:21:59 – 00:22:06] I really believe that when I intensively practice these principles as a way of life, there is no room for failure.

[00:22:06 – 00:22:08] No room for failure.

[00:22:08 – 00:22:16] And so that’s one thing of, of, effectiveness, of just, of, of the many, many things that, that can be done.

[00:22:16 – 00:22:26] Newcomer meetings, y-that, that, that, that can do an effective job of taking new people and helping them understand something about what this activity is, is all about.

[00:22:26 – 00:22:30] The, uh, singleness of purpose.

[00:22:30 – 00:22:37] My buddy last night did a wonderful job, uh, a, an, a well-articulated presentation on singleness of purpose.

[00:22:37 – 00:22:39] And, and I just wanna kinda underline that a little bit.

[00:22:39 – 00:22:42] And, and, uh, because it is a huge problem.

[00:22:42 – 00:22:47] And it’s a thing that, that I want to have better understanding about than I do.

[00:22:47 – 00:22:50] I’m not up for grabs on it.

[00:22:50 – 00:22:55] I’ve got a very strong position that I hold today, and it won’t change easily.

[00:22:55 – 00:22:59] But at the same time, I, I, I don’t– I’m not blind.

[00:22:59 – 00:23:01] My God, I can see what’s happening.

[00:23:01 – 00:23:06] And, and my concern is that we’re, we’re not dealing with it very well.

[00:23:06 – 00:23:09] Just generally speaking, we’re not dealing with, with it very well.

[00:23:09 – 00:23:22] Yeah, I have the privilege, great privilege of traveling all over the place and, and, uh, and, and, and without exception, almost every place I go, high on the agenda of things we worry about is singleness of purpose.

[00:23:22 – 00:23:32] There are, there are large areas of this country that have given up any pretense of singleness of purpose, don’t even use the words.

[00:23:32 – 00:23:40] Well, I just believe that, that that’s fraught with a lot of peril when we start taking that kind of a move.

[00:23:40 – 00:23:42] And, and my buddy spelled it out darn well.

[00:23:42 – 00:23:48] Let me say it a little bit differently than, than he said it, but it’s saying the same thing.

[00:23:48 – 00:23:57] When, when I look at singleness of purpose, and, and why was it I’m, I’m alarmed, but it doesn’t have to do with my personal preferences for who I hang out with.

[00:23:57 – 00:23:58] God, I could care less.

[00:23:58 – 00:24:01] It doesn’t have to do with that.

[00:24:01 – 00:24:05] It has to do with the integrity and vitality of our program.

[00:24:05 – 00:24:19] What happened in Akron, Ohio, when Bill and Bob met, was here was a, a, a decrepit stockbroker and a rundown doc, both of them on their last legs.

[00:24:19 – 00:24:31] The stockbroker had found a vision he didn’t understand very well, but he fervently believed, and he, he developed a, a, a real intense thing about the solution that he’d found.

[00:24:31 – 00:24:35] So he got this doc, and they sat down and talked.

[00:24:35 – 00:24:36] And among the things that Dr.

[00:24:36 – 00:24:47] Bob said was, “Finally, somebody understands.” What formed that day was the basic tenet of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:24:47 – 00:24:51] That’s the basic tenet of what we’re doing here this morning.

[00:24:51 – 00:24:56] That’s the basic tenet of the international convention.

[00:24:56 – 00:25:04] We never do anything more important nor more noble than one alcoholic opening up and sharing with another.

[00:25:04 – 00:25:20] And what was formed that day was a, a, an ethic, a belief that when one alcoholic talks to another alcoholic gut level, something happens that had never effectively happened in the history of the world.

[00:25:20 – 00:25:23] It has a unique value.

[00:25:23 – 00:25:32] Well, what it comes down to, folks, is, is this with me, and why I stand as firmly as I stand where I stand.

[00:25:32 – 00:25:36] I believe that tenet.

[00:25:36 – 00:25:42] And that tenet is either right or it’s wrong.

[00:25:42 – 00:25:47] It either matters greatly or not at all.

[00:25:47 – 00:26:10] If it’s right, then every one of us sitting here today, if you’re an AA member, every one of us has an absolute responsibility to defend that ethic for the next– that tenet for the next person who walks into this room looking for the trusting environment, trustworthy environment of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:26:10 – 00:26:13] That’s our responsibility.

[00:26:13 – 00:26:18] We, none of us have the authority.

[00:26:18 – 00:26:26] We may have the, the, the, the recklessness, but none of us have the authority to really shape a program of which we’re just one member.

[00:26:26 – 00:26:30] And I’ll guarantee you, I’m not gonna be the one who says, “Well, that doesn’t really matter.

[00:26:30 – 00:26:31] It’ll be all right.

[00:26:31 – 00:26:32] You’re close enough.

[00:26:32 – 00:26:33] Just lie about it for a while.

[00:26:33 – 00:26:34] Maybe you’ll catch it,” you know.

[00:26:34 – 00:26:36] That’s, that’s not good enough for me.

[00:26:36 – 00:26:41] If that tenet’s not true, then it doesn’t matter.

[00:26:41 – 00:26:43] It couldn’t matter less.

[00:26:43 – 00:26:47] That fat lady with the ice cream is just as welcome as could be in a closed meeting.

[00:26:47 – 00:26:49] That either is true or it’s not.

[00:26:49 – 00:26:52] That’s an, that’s an understanding.

[00:26:52 – 00:27:03] You– And, and, and what I would like to ask everybody here to do is not just decide what you think at the pop quiz level, but search your own conscience about that.

[00:27:03 – 00:27:05] Search your own conscience.

[00:27:05 – 00:27:12] Do you really believe that that tenet is vital to the health and well-being and effectiveness of AA?

[00:27:12 – 00:27:16] If you do, you will probably take some action.

[00:27:16 – 00:27:20] And I’m not talking about being nasty to people.

[00:27:20 – 00:27:23] I’m talking about just having a real purpose for which…

[00:27:23 – 00:27:28] Say, that principle is– it doesn’t de-determine what we are not for.

[00:27:28 – 00:27:33] It determines what we must support and, and maintain.

[00:27:33 – 00:27:41] It is my duty, accepted duty, to be sure that the next person who walks in this room gets as good as I was given.

[00:27:41 – 00:27:43] That’s my duty.

[00:27:43 – 00:27:47] If I don’t do that, then I’m abdicating responsibility.

[00:27:47 – 00:27:53] So when you start looking for, uh, understanding and effectiveness, there’s lots of places to look.

[00:27:53 – 00:27:55] Lots of places.

[00:27:55 – 00:27:56] That’s, that’s just a couple of them.

[00:27:56 – 00:27:59] The, um…

[00:27:59 – 00:28:16] I’ll tell you one last thing I’d say about that, that in order to accommodate folks who are, who are not quite alcoholic, in order to co-accommodate folk in AA, we have to compromise the program.

[00:28:16 – 00:28:19] We have to compromise the integrity of the program.

[00:28:19 – 00:28:30] And I would submit to you that you can’t compromise the integrity of the program to f-forget– to fit the individual peculiarities of the people go walking, walking in the door.

[00:28:30 – 00:28:31] If you do, we lose our purpose.

[00:28:31 – 00:28:37] What needed to change when I walked in these door was me, not the group.

[00:28:37 – 00:28:45] And so that kind of issue is, is, is deeply embedded in, in that, in that, uh, simple-sounding little thing.

[00:28:45 – 00:28:50] If, um– And, and I hope that you’ll give ser-serious thought to that.

[00:28:50 – 00:29:04] And, uh, do, do whatever you can in, in that thing because it really truly is, uh, well, I said I wasn’t gonna say one more thing, but I’ll, I’ll add one more, no extra charge.

[00:29:04 – 00:29:08] You mentioned a group in New York.

[00:29:08 – 00:29:20] I don’t know how many places I go in this country when I look for some of my old buddies who have deserted the home base of Alcoholics Anonymous in a city.

[00:29:20 – 00:29:26] To me, that’s almost kind of holy ground , you know, the place where the thing started.

[00:29:26 – 00:29:32] And, uh, it just seemed like it ought to have a pivotal role in the– in, in how AA grew around it.

[00:29:32 – 00:29:37] In many places, old-timers have simply walked away.

[00:29:37 – 00:29:39] They didn’t just die off.

[00:29:39 – 00:29:41] They just simply walked away.

[00:29:41 – 00:29:44] Moved to the suburbs, whatever, you know.

[00:29:44 – 00:29:54] They, they– But it’s just that thing of, of conditions becoming so inappropriate and uncomfortable that they just leave and, and, and that’s what I mean by abdicating.

[00:29:54 – 00:29:57] And, and so a, a troubling kind of thing that…

[00:29:57 – 00:30:04] Now, I’m– it looks like I’m gonna take two hours on just, uh, one paragraph, but that’s why I told you we’ll quit anyway, whether we get through or not.

[00:30:04 – 00:30:10] I’d rather do one thing thoroughly than see Europe in twenty-one days.

[00:30:10 – 00:30:16] I’d rather…

[00:30:16 – 00:30:27] The, uh, the other thing that, that I, I just want to draw your attention to, if, if you probably already have your attention drawn, but I’d like to just r-rustle it anyway.

[00:30:27 – 00:30:35] It, it’s the strange kind of a developmental process in AA that, um, that, that’s occurred.

[00:30:35 – 00:30:48] And the other– if, if you can remember it, the other advantage of being old is, uh, if you can remember it, is, is– are the changes that have occurred in, in the fellowship, in the character of the fellowship.

[00:30:48 – 00:30:55] In those early days when our time was spent not in studying books and lea-learning all of the infinitives that go with the first step.

[00:30:55 – 00:30:57] It wasn’t in that.

[00:30:57 – 00:31:00] You know, it was in action, in intensive work with other alcoholics.

[00:31:00 – 00:31:02] The program was a program of action.

[00:31:02 – 00:31:09] The, the intimacy and the fellowship and the sense of belonging was, was profoundly im-important i-in the fellowship.

[00:31:09 – 00:31:13] And over the years, we have, we have moved in a different direction with that.

[00:31:13 – 00:31:21] And, you know, certainly you could tie it into the advent of treatment at– because treatment had a lot of effects on Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:31:21 – 00:31:24] Some of them would look good.

[00:31:24 – 00:31:35] Uh, for in-for instance, uh, if you’re con-concerned about the, the support of, of our expenses in Alcoholics Anonymous, at one point, a good share of them came from the treatment industry.

[00:31:35 – 00:31:37] Now, we went for, what?

[00:31:37 – 00:31:40] Twenty-five years before we ever sold a million good book– uh, good books.

[00:31:40 – 00:31:41] Big books.

[00:31:41 – 00:31:47] That was– For a number of years, we sold almost a million a year.

[00:31:47 – 00:31:49] But guess who bought them?

[00:31:49 – 00:31:50] Guess who bought them?

[00:31:50 – 00:31:54] You’ve heard of the thirty thousand dollars big book.

[00:31:54 – 00:31:55] Yeah.

[00:31:55 – 00:31:57] So that, that’s where a tremendous amount of stuff– Some things happened.

[00:31:57 – 00:32:04] You know, there’s some– There was a stimulation in the, in the increase, I won’t say of groups, but of meetings that, uh That grew out of that.

[00:32:04 – 00:32:09] There was a lot of impact on language, on terminology, on how s- how we see ourselves in groups.

[00:32:09 – 00:32:10] A lot of things happened.

[00:32:10 – 00:32:19] One that, that causes me con- some concern, and it’s not just owing to the advent of treatment, but that’s certainly a, a, a major contributor.

[00:32:19 – 00:32:36] The– but what happened is we started to move almost definitively away from well-ordered, purposeful, structured groups into casual gatherings or meetings, which are not really groups at all.

[00:32:36 – 00:32:37] They, they were just…

[00:32:37 – 00:32:41] I mean, I mean, there’s no, there’s no pass-fail on this thing.

[00:32:41 – 00:32:42] It’s a continuum.

[00:32:42 – 00:32:46] You know, you’ve got everything from, you know, like I belong to a strong, purposeful group.

[00:32:46 – 00:32:47] I know that some of you do.

[00:32:47 – 00:32:53] Specific and Pacific and, and it– I know many of you belong to strong, purposeful groups.

[00:32:53 – 00:32:56] That’s where I belong.

[00:32:56 – 00:32:57] That’s where my group is.

[00:32:57 – 00:32:59] Now, that’s one kind of a group.

[00:32:59 – 00:33:01] That’s the one where I want to belong.

[00:33:01 – 00:33:06] But that group is no better than any other down the continuum.

[00:33:06 – 00:33:10] They all function under the banner of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:33:10 – 00:33:20] And just because something doesn’t shape up and conform to our model doesn’t mean that it’s not just as legitimate as my, as, as my home group.

[00:33:20 – 00:33:31] We’ve got probably the most generous we, we got the most generous qualification for membership you could possibly have.

[00:33:31 – 00:33:33] If you say you’re a member, you’re a member.

[00:33:33 – 00:33:36] No committee, no resume, no Rorschach test.

[00:33:36 – 00:33:39] You, you just– If you say you’re in, you’re in.

[00:33:39 – 00:33:42] You stay there till you either quit or drink, whichever comes first.

[00:33:42 – 00:33:43] You’re history either way.

[00:33:43 – 00:33:45] And, and so it’s easy.

[00:33:45 – 00:33:47] Groups are just as easy.

[00:33:47 – 00:34:03] Any time two or more alcoholics join together for the purpose of recovery, they can call themselves an AA group, as long as they don’t have hooked into something else, you know, a-a-another affiliation.

[00:34:03 – 00:34:04] Is that loose or what?

[00:34:04 – 00:34:23] I mean, if we wanted to form a group at Whiskey Pete’s whose purpose was to provide a counterculture for people who didn’t like structure or who didn’t like the service work in Alcoholics Anonymous, they could legitimately call themselves an AA group, and nobody gonna shut them down.

[00:34:23 – 00:34:31] So we– it’s not a matter of pass-fail, it’s a matter of where do we lose the vitality, or do we lose it?

[00:34:31 – 00:34:33] Where do we lose the, um, things that are important?

[00:34:33 – 00:34:38] Now, my– I-I’ll just let you in on this little secret if you hadn’t already picked it up.

[00:34:38 – 00:34:47] Among the few concerns that I have in Alcoholics Anonymous, my greatest one, my greatest one is the one I’m talking about right now.

[00:34:47 – 00:34:51] Because that’s the infrastructure of the program.

[00:34:51 – 00:34:54] That’s where members are born and grow and develop.

[00:34:54 – 00:35:02] And if you take a look along that continuum all the way down to the end where it’s a gather– casual gathering with no leadership.

[00:35:02 – 00:35:06] You know, they’re places that they have absolutely no structured leadership whatsoever.

[00:35:06 – 00:35:07] The meeting just occurs.

[00:35:07 – 00:35:17] It’s– it happens when the people walk in, and its value extends for the life of that meeting, and then it’s over, and that’s all there is to it.

[00:35:17 – 00:35:25] Now, I would submit to you that to deal with the formidable problems that we confront in dealing with alcoholics, that ain’t enough.

[00:35:25 – 00:35:32] If you start looking at a s- at a fellowship that reaches around the world, where does leadership come from?

[00:35:32 – 00:35:35] How much leadership are you gonna get out of that kind of a gathering?

[00:35:35 – 00:35:39] What you’ll find most of the time is a one-dimensional program.

[00:35:39 – 00:35:42] It has to do with me and how am I doing.

[00:35:42 – 00:35:44] That’s all.

[00:35:44 – 00:35:45] That’s all.

[00:35:45 – 00:35:51] Pretty hard to treat a self-centered condition by focus on self.

[00:35:51 – 00:35:55] Don’t think that flies too well.

[00:35:55 – 00:35:56] And so that’s my biggest concern.

[00:35:56 – 00:36:00] I think that bodes most ill for the future, and it’s one of the concerns.

[00:36:00 – 00:36:02] I hope that you’ll give some thought to that.

[00:36:02 – 00:36:09] Because those things will resolve when the conscience of the fellowship moves effectively.

[00:36:09 – 00:36:16] And that’s why I’d, I’d, I’d like to talk about th-this kind of a thing some because it– I think it’s vital to our health and well-being.

[00:36:16 – 00:36:18] The, uh…

[00:36:18 – 00:36:23] Well, I, I…

[00:36:23 – 00:36:31] Let– I’ll, I’ll say one other thing that sort of talks about group and, uh, and, and, uh, it also go back to singles purpose a little bit.

[00:36:31 – 00:36:38] Uh, my home group one night, a guy came up to me and said, said, “Tom, we need to do a group inventory.” Now, that’s an unusual request.

[00:36:38 – 00:36:40] Very few people ask for a group inventory.

[00:36:40 – 00:36:50] And I said, “Why is that?” And he said, “Well, we got too many addicts in here.” And I swear to God, I, I mean, I know that I’m kind of addlepated sometimes.

[00:36:50 – 00:36:53] I, I really hadn’t quite caught on what he was talking about.

[00:36:53 – 00:37:00] I said, “Well, let me take a look and see if I see the same thing.” And what it was, uh, somebody was loading up a bunch of kids from an adolescent center and bringing them over.

[00:37:00 – 00:37:03] You know, most of our wounds are self-imposed.

[00:37:03 – 00:37:05] They’re not inflicted on us.

[00:37:05 – 00:37:07] They’re mostly self-imposed.

[00:37:07 – 00:37:13] And, and what’s happening, these, these kids were coming over there, and my God, those kids didn’t know if they’re alcoholics or goats.

[00:37:13 – 00:37:17] Uh, good God, they’re just they’re just kids, you know, crazy kids.

[00:37:17 – 00:37:24] And so they come in, and our guys, in their zeal to make them feel welcome, were involving them in a meeting.

[00:37:25 – 00:37:31] So you’d have a fourteen-year-old child that was not no alcoholic at all up conducting a meeting.

[00:37:31 – 00:37:33] Yeah, uh, and, um, that’s…

[00:37:33 – 00:37:36] You know, AA meetings are run by AA members.

[00:37:36 – 00:37:37] That’s a given.

[00:37:37 – 00:37:42] You know, it was not always a given, but it’s a truism that meetings are run by members.

[00:37:42 – 00:37:43] That’s, that’s what we’re doing.

[00:37:43 – 00:37:49] So, so we, they said, “All right, let’s talk about that.” We pulled a little group together, talked about it, and they said, well, decided two actions.

[00:37:49 – 00:37:53] One, we, we’d, we’d, uh, we’d go over and talk to the director of the house.

[00:37:53 – 00:37:55] And they asked me to do that, and I said, “Sure, I’ll do it.” Went over.

[00:37:55 – 00:37:58] Nice lady, nice lady, good MSW.

[00:37:58 – 00:38:01] And as I talked with her, couldn’t have been more cooperative.

[00:38:01 – 00:38:01] She, she…

[00:38:01 – 00:38:06] Nobody had ever told her that we had such things as open and closed meetings.

[00:38:06 – 00:38:07] They don’t teach that in social work school.

[00:38:07 – 00:38:11] We just sort of pompously assume that everybody knows.

[00:38:11 – 00:38:12] Well, everybody doesn’t know.

[00:38:12 – 00:38:15] And so the minute I told her about it, she said, “Oh my God, yes.

[00:38:15 – 00:38:16] I didn’t know about that.

[00:38:16 – 00:38:16] There’s no problem.

[00:38:16 – 00:38:25] We’ll d- we’ll deal with that.” But that’s not good enough because when you’re running a, a, a place with a bunch of wild ones running around like that, you’re not gonna put a lot of order and discipline in that.

[00:38:25 – 00:38:27] So we started something.

[00:38:27 – 00:38:29] This has been twenty-five years ago.

[00:38:29 – 00:38:30] We started something.

[00:38:30 – 00:38:38] We set up a newcomer program that met at the same time as our regular meeting, and it dealt with newcomer stuff.

[00:38:38 – 00:38:42] And we limited it to the first three months of sobriety.

[00:38:42 – 00:38:45] And, and what that gave us, we made it an open meeting.

[00:38:45 – 00:38:59] And what that gave us was a, an environment in which we could, without a lot of, of, of caustic interaction and all of this stuff, we could reasonably help those, those young folks figure out where they needed to go.

[00:38:59 – 00:39:02] And by the way, it took in a lot of members in the process, too.

[00:39:02 – 00:39:05] It wasn’t just f-for, for the wayward folk.

[00:39:05 – 00:39:13] But, you know, when people are coming out of treatment facilities, a lot of times we overrate the qu- the quality of the preparation.

[00:39:13 – 00:39:17] You know, what treatment does is lowers the barriers enough that somebody could come to AA.

[00:39:17 – 00:39:21] It gives not one day of recovery in the world.

[00:39:21 – 00:39:31] And when somebody walks in out of a treatment center, I don’t care which one it is, they’re a brand-new member of Alcoholics Anonymous and need the same kind of orientation, guidance that, that a, that a brand-new person does.

[00:39:31 – 00:39:38] And, and so what that’s done is the past twenty-five years, I haven’t been in a group that hadn’t had a strong newcomer program.

[00:39:38 – 00:39:40] It invariably is one of the most important tools we have.

[00:39:40 – 00:39:52] It’s simply a way to look at a problem, look at how can we take that, understand that problem enough to do something effective about it.

[00:39:52 – 00:39:53] That’s what I like.

[00:39:53 – 00:40:01] I like to be in a, in a, in a world where we’re making things work and not just, just criticizing what exists, you know?

[00:40:01 – 00:40:03] And, and so that’s the whole message of that.

[00:40:03 – 00:40:06] We’re through one half page of page of step ten.

[00:40:06 – 00:40:10] That I just didn’t want you to get lost in that.

[00:40:10 – 00:40:13] And, uh, the, uh…

[00:40:13 – 00:40:18] I, I’m j- I’m just gonna sprint to the, to the finish on that and then move over to eleven a little bit.

[00:40:18 – 00:40:21] And, uh, we’re all right.

[00:40:21 – 00:40:23] We’re not even close.

[00:40:23 – 00:40:31] We The other thing that I j- I just visit for a minute that, that, that is, is not…

[00:40:31 – 00:40:32] It may be live or die stuff.

[00:40:32 – 00:40:39] A, a place in that second part of that, of that, uh, tenth step that’s, um, it’s almost like a mixed message in a way.

[00:40:39 – 00:40:48] ‘Cause when you, when you re-read through it, if you’re a super optimist like me, you can really jump to some conclusions that are dangerous to your health in this thing.

[00:40:48 – 00:40:57] You know, like in the, in the first paragraph of paragraph C, w-we’re talking about the new attitude that comes when we start getting focused and getting into the program and start getting recovery.

[00:40:57 – 00:41:04] Uh, we’ll see that our new attitude toward, attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part.

[00:41:04 – 00:41:08] Uh, and of course, discounting the first nine steps.

[00:41:08 – 00:41:10] That has a little contributing factor.

[00:41:10 – 00:41:12] It just comes, you know?

[00:41:12 – 00:41:13] It just descends from manna.

[00:41:13 – 00:41:16] That’s the miracle of it.

[00:41:16 – 00:41:20] We’re not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation.

[00:41:20 – 00:41:24] We feel as though we have been placed in a position of neutrality.

[00:41:24 – 00:41:28] I said that from mem-me-memory.

[00:41:28 – 00:41:32] Oh, safe and protected.

[00:41:32 – 00:41:33] We have not even sworn off.

[00:41:33 – 00:41:36] Instead, the problem has been removed.

[00:41:36 – 00:41:37] That sucker’s gone.

[00:41:37 – 00:41:40] Uh, it does not exist for us.

[00:41:40 – 00:41:43] We are neither cocky, nor are we afraid.

[00:41:43 – 00:41:45] That is our experience.

[00:41:45 – 00:41:49] Now, that’d be some, some really whoopee kind of, of news, wouldn’t it?

[00:41:49 – 00:41:51] Man, that dude’s gone.

[00:41:51 – 00:41:52] Just like a lobotomy.

[00:41:52 – 00:41:52] It’s gone.

[00:41:52 – 00:41:54] We got a whole new head there.

[00:41:54 – 00:41:57] But read the bottom line.

[00:41:57 – 00:42:02] That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

[00:42:02 – 00:42:06] And the minute I’m not in fit spiritual condition, all bets are off.

[00:42:06 – 00:42:10] It’s easy to let up on the spiritual…

[00:42:10 – 00:42:13] I’m gonna read these two paragraphs just to, to frame that a little bit.

[00:42:13 – 00:42:16] Easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurel.

[00:42:16 – 00:42:17] Sure it is.

[00:42:17 – 00:42:18] What’s a laurel?

[00:42:18 – 00:42:19] That’s an accomplishment.

[00:42:19 – 00:42:20] I can take a look.

[00:42:20 – 00:42:23] My God, man, I’ve been doing this almost forty-nine years.

[00:42:23 – 00:42:24] I ought to just quit and let somebody else do it.

[00:42:24 – 00:42:29] Well, I don’t give up quite that easy.

[00:42:29 – 00:42:34] I, I was in my group one night, and I’d been on the road for a while in, in a ca- when I, I was still working.

[00:42:34 – 00:42:35] Now I’m unemployed now.

[00:42:35 – 00:42:37] Pitiful case.

[00:42:37 – 00:42:43] And I was, and I’d come in, and I just do stuff there, you know?

[00:42:43 – 00:42:47] I’d, I’d, I’d grab the coffee pot- I, I just felt like washing a coffee pot, so I’m gonna wash it.

[00:42:47 – 00:42:54] A young girl came up to me, she said, “Why are you washing that pot?” I said, “My God, girl, that thing was dirty.

[00:42:54 – 00:43:06] I mean, that dude was dirty.” And she said, “Well, that’s my job.” And I said, “Well, you’re gonna have to get a little quicker on your job because…” I will get mine.

[00:43:06 – 00:43:09] I, uh, uh, never mind, there’s plenty of room at the doing place.

[00:43:09 – 00:43:11] But, but I’m gonna do mine.

[00:43:11 – 00:43:17] I’m not gonna let up on that spiritual condition, nor the expressions of it in my life.

[00:43:17 – 00:43:20] And, um, so it’s easy, it is easy to let up on it.

[00:43:20 – 00:43:22] We’re headed for trouble if we do.

[00:43:22 – 00:43:24] Alcoholism is a subtle foe.

[00:43:24 – 00:43:25] We’re not cured of alcoholism.

[00:43:25 – 00:43:31] What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of that spiritual condition.

[00:43:31 – 00:43:34] Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities.

[00:43:34 – 00:43:36] How can I best serve you?

[00:43:36 – 00:43:37] Your will, not mine, be done.

[00:43:37 – 00:43:40] These are thoughts which must go with us constantly.

[00:43:40 – 00:43:42] We exercise willpower.

[00:43:42 – 00:43:44] It’s proper use of the will.

[00:43:44 – 00:43:53] You know, that very, very, very, very profound stuff in that, that as long as I stay in fit spiritual condition, man, I don’t have to worry about booze.

[00:43:53 – 00:43:56] I can walk through Whiskey Pete’s, and I couldn’t care whether they got booze or milkshakes.

[00:43:56 – 00:43:57] It doesn’t matter to me.

[00:43:57 – 00:43:59] I’m gonna just give it no thought.

[00:43:59 – 00:44:03] I’ll tell you one little story about diligence, about…

[00:44:03 – 00:44:05] and how easily stuff can happen.

[00:44:05 – 00:44:06] Now, this is no trauma.

[00:44:06 – 00:44:14] But I was, I was changing planes somewhere, and, and I was kind of rushing from one concourse to another, and I really wanted a coffee.

[00:44:14 – 00:44:15] I went to Starbucks, couldn’t find one.

[00:44:15 – 00:44:16] But I, I was looking for a coffee.

[00:44:16 – 00:44:24] And, um, I saw a pl- a, a place open, and so I just ducked in, and it was a bar.

[00:44:24 – 00:44:27] Now, I mean, I, I don’t go into shock when I walk into a bar.

[00:44:27 – 00:44:28] We’ve got them everywhere.

[00:44:28 – 00:44:31] But I walked in, saw what it was.

[00:44:31 – 00:44:32] It didn’t look like, it didn’t like a coffee place.

[00:44:32 – 00:44:36] And, and a waiter walked by carrying a tray of drinks.

[00:44:36 – 00:44:48] And I looked at that, and I said, “Jeez, that’s a nice presentation.” Well, well, now that’s not 911 stuff.

[00:44:48 – 00:44:50] Unless you’re a guy like me.

[00:44:50 – 00:44:59] Because I could take a simple little innocent, innocuous thought like that and play that sucker out.

[00:44:59 – 00:45:03] And man, first thing you know, I’d be in Rio de Janeiro somewhere.

[00:45:03 – 00:45:04] I mean, that, uh, that…

[00:45:04 – 00:45:07] my mind has no business there.

[00:45:07 – 00:45:13] I don’t need to be having friendly thoughts about booze, nor angry thoughts about booze.

[00:45:13 – 00:45:16] I need to be having no thoughts about booze.

[00:45:16 – 00:45:18] Now, that was a desire.

[00:45:18 – 00:45:25] But it just shows how easily you get that little chink, and sometimes that’s all it takes is a little chink, and then that dude will grow.

[00:45:25 – 00:45:27] And then watch, and then watch what happens.

[00:45:27 – 00:45:36] And so 10, you know, 10’s an enormous action step, as you might gather from at least my ver- my, my, my view of the thing.

[00:45:36 – 00:45:41] And, um, then we move into a, to, to a…

[00:45:41 – 00:45:42] Now, that didn’t even take an hour.

[00:45:42 – 00:45:45] I, I, I tell you, man, I am good.

[00:45:45 – 00:45:46] I am really quick.

[00:45:46 – 00:45:53] And I did that in Southern too, and that’s- That’s slow motion.

[00:45:53 – 00:45:54] I guess…

[00:45:54 – 00:46:02] It, uh, these whole steps, you know, a lot of times we do them a great disservice and refer, refer to them as maintenance steps.

[00:46:02 – 00:46:12] I, I think they’re the most powerful action steps in the program because they spell out definity how to get out of that studying my own case and taking my pulse every 30 minutes.

[00:46:12 – 00:46:19] It gets me out of that mode and into the action mode of carrying this message and making this thing come alive, and that’s what it’s about.

[00:46:19 – 00:46:29] You know, that stuff that Sharon treated so beautifully about, of getting that wreckage out of the way so we’re free to breathe free and, and engage in life.

[00:46:29 – 00:46:31] And that’s what these steps do.

[00:46:31 – 00:46:32] They say, “Okay, you’ve done that.

[00:46:32 – 00:46:41] Now let’s go to work.” And seven, uh, to, uh, ele- 11 is not about going up on the mountain and, and bringing back tablets or anything like that.

[00:46:41 – 00:46:44] It’s nothing heavy or deep or, or, or…

[00:46:44 – 00:46:45] Well, it’s deep.

[00:46:45 – 00:46:46] It’s as deep as you wanna go.

[00:46:46 – 00:46:48] But it’s not mystical.

[00:46:48 – 00:46:49] You know?

[00:46:49 – 00:46:51] It, it’s, it’s a very sensible kind of a thing to do.

[00:46:51 – 00:46:56] That what it calls for is, is, uh…

[00:46:56 – 00:47:00] That’s really great.

[00:47:00 – 00:47:02] Give me the first one.

[00:47:02 – 00:47:04] 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20.

[00:47:04 – 00:47:05] Okay.

[00:47:05 – 00:47:13] “Sought through prayer and meditation to…” Listen, man, I’m 84 years old.

[00:47:13 – 00:47:13] I…

[00:47:13 – 00:47:17] You don’t believe that?

[00:47:17 – 00:47:34] “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.” Yeah, I think that step is loaded with invitations, and not only invitations, but drive toward service.

[00:47:34 – 00:47:37] I really believe that’s what’s spelled out in that thing.

[00:47:37 – 00:47:43] Now, certainly it has to do with having a sound, working spiritual life.

[00:47:43 – 00:47:44] That’s core.

[00:47:44 – 00:47:45] That’s fundamental.

[00:47:45 – 00:47:50] I’m somebody who believes, like it says in the book, the spiritual life, it’s, it’s…

[00:47:50 – 00:47:52] God’s every, every- everything or it’s nothing.

[00:47:52 – 00:47:56] It’s, it’s, a spiritual life is the way we live, or there is no spiritual life.

[00:47:56 – 00:48:00] If I don’t practice spiritual life in everything I do, then there’s nothing to it.

[00:48:00 – 00:48:04] And so it’s part and parcel of everything I do.

[00:48:04 – 00:48:05] It’s what drives my life.

[00:48:05 – 00:48:06] It’s what- Give me what I need.

[00:48:06 – 00:48:13] But I have to continue to nurture that relationship and develop that relationship.

[00:48:13 – 00:48:18] Now, I, I’ll tell you how simple that is for me and, and how tran- how, how that translates into action.

[00:48:18 – 00:48:20] I have…

[00:48:20 – 00:48:26] I don’t know if my wife’s in here or not, but, uh, if she’s not, don’t tell her this.

[00:48:26 – 00:48:30] I, uh, I, I’m a, I’m a great lover of water.

[00:48:30 – 00:48:34] If you’ve ever been to a Workshop with me, I always talk, I always like to talk about this.

[00:48:34 – 00:48:36] That, uh, I, I’ve always loved water.

[00:48:36 – 00:48:39] And, um, you can tell that.

[00:48:39 – 00:48:42] And I lo- I, I just…

[00:48:42 – 00:48:54] One of my f- favorite places to get, just for reflection or meditation or getting into some spiritual thoughts or whatever, or just sort of to- taking it easy, I just love to get by water, particularly running water.

[00:48:54 – 00:49:01] And I’d always had this kind of desire to have a, a l- a pond out behind my house.

[00:49:01 – 00:49:07] Well, my wife had no interest in a pond, and she keeps my money locked up a lot.

[00:49:07 – 00:49:17] And, uh, so, so I, uh, I, I gave her a pond for her 33rd wedding anniversary.

[00:49:17 – 00:49:25] She, she said, “Gee, thanks, big guy.” I got the…

[00:49:25 – 00:49:27] And she…

[00:49:27 – 00:49:29] I finally let her feed the fish.

[00:49:29 – 00:49:31] I thought she was gonna poison them for a while.

[00:49:31 – 00:49:35] But, I mean, you, you, you…

[00:49:35 – 00:49:40] Sometimes just a little manipulation is spiritual, I think.

[00:49:40 – 00:49:49] I- So, so I got that pond, and, and, and that’s where I do my best preparation.

[00:49:49 – 00:49:50] That’s, that’s where.

[00:49:50 – 00:49:53] And every day that I can, uh, that, that, um…

[00:49:53 – 00:49:57] And it doesn’t have to be, my God, I do it on airplanes.

[00:49:57 – 00:49:58] I do it walking down the street.

[00:49:58 – 00:50:04] I mean, it doesn’t require some special place and robes and smoke and incense and all that junk.

[00:50:04 – 00:50:07] I mean, that’s fine if you want to do that, but I’m d- I’d…

[00:50:07 – 00:50:08] Not me, man.

[00:50:08 – 00:50:09] I got stuff to do.

[00:50:09 – 00:50:10] I’m not gonna get around in a trance.

[00:50:10 – 00:50:19] So, the, uh, so what I do in, in, in the morning, I like to go out there and just sort of sit there.

[00:50:19 – 00:50:22] And I watch those fish just busy being fish.

[00:50:22 – 00:50:27] And, uh, and listen to that waterfall, you know, that thing just gurgling and gurgling.

[00:50:27 – 00:50:30] It’s just a wonderful, soothing, peaceful feeling.

[00:50:30 – 00:50:36] And, and, and I, I don’t know if, if, if everybody’s like this or not, but I mean, most folks are.

[00:50:36 – 00:50:38] Brain is an active thing.

[00:50:38 – 00:50:42] Even if it’s n- not loaded with intelligence, it, it’s a busy thing.

[00:50:42 – 00:50:48] And, and when I start to do that, man, my mind is going a mile a minute.

[00:50:48 – 00:50:48] You know?

[00:50:48 – 00:50:51] And I, and I’m not thinking heavy-duty spiritual thoughts.

[00:50:51 – 00:51:01] I’m thinking, “Oh, gee, well, I’m supposed to call that guy, and I’m supposed to be over that there.” So I just have to listen a while just to sort of get quiet and let my brain settle down.

[00:51:01 – 00:51:09] And then it’s not r- it’s not routinized to the point of ritual.

[00:51:09 – 00:51:14] I, I don’t do the exact same thing, but essentially what I do every day is I talk to my higher power.

[00:51:14 – 00:51:20] And I sit there and I listen a lot, and I just kind of reflect and meditate and get my, my thing together.

[00:51:20 – 00:51:27] And then when I’m ready to, to, to, uh, to pray, what, what I basically do is, is about three things.

[00:51:27 – 00:51:35] One, every day I wanna, I wanna reflect on who I am.

[00:51:35 – 00:51:37] Who am I?

[00:51:37 – 00:51:41] Yeah, I’m not some big deal flying all around the world.

[00:51:41 – 00:51:42] That’s not who I am.

[00:51:42 – 00:51:45] I’m an alcoholic.

[00:51:45 – 00:51:52] I have an absolutely fatal, incurable illness.

[00:51:52 – 00:52:02] I have an illness that the overwhelming majority on this planet die of never really knowing there’s a way out.

[00:52:02 – 00:52:06] Some in this country, some in countries where AA has never been heard of.

[00:52:06 – 00:52:17] So I reflect on that, that I’m not somebody who just sort of casually sauntered into Alcoholics Anonymous or somebody kind of drug me in here, tried to brainwash me.

[00:52:17 – 00:52:18] No.

[00:52:18 – 00:52:21] I’m a guy with a hopeless condition.

[00:52:21 – 00:52:28] And why on earth I wound up here, I don’t waste time thinking about, ’cause I could never figure it out.

[00:52:28 – 00:52:34] You know, we think we’re a pretty big crowd till we think of the scope of the world population.

[00:52:34 – 00:52:41] If you think about in terms like that, we are barely a blip on the radar screen.

[00:52:41 – 00:52:45] We’re such a tiny percentage of the alcoholic set.

[00:52:45 – 00:52:48] And so I like to reflect on that.

[00:52:48 – 00:52:54] That, man, for whatever reason, I’ve been given a gift beyond estimate.

[00:52:54 – 00:52:55] Beyond estimate.

[00:52:55 – 00:53:02] Given a life, given a life that surpasses anything I could have ever imagined.

[00:53:02 – 00:53:07] And I’ll guarantee you, deserving is not in my vocabulary.

[00:53:07 – 00:53:08] So I reflect on that.

[00:53:08 – 00:53:13] And when I do that, I get properly geared.

[00:53:13 – 00:53:14] And that’s not morbid.

[00:53:14 – 00:53:16] That’s just a reality check.

[00:53:16 – 00:53:17] This is who I am.

[00:53:17 – 00:53:19] This is fundamentally who I am.

[00:53:19 – 00:53:21] Those are bottom-line things with me.

[00:53:21 – 00:53:26] And when I am real solid inside, I’m pretty doggone tough outside.

[00:53:27 – 00:53:30] So I like to get real well fixed in that.

[00:53:30 – 00:53:32] Doesn’t take long, doesn’t take long at all.

[00:53:32 – 00:53:46] And then when I do, I pray that I will let the way I carry myself during the day reflect the gratitude that I have for the gift that I’ve been given.

[00:53:46 – 00:53:48] My God, is that a no-brainer?

[00:53:48 – 00:53:56] I mean, my, how could I take a priceless gift and then just say, “Oh, well, you know, I’m sober and putting up with stuff”?

[00:53:56 – 00:53:58] Baloney.

[00:53:58 – 00:54:06] Yeah, I’m somebody who’s been given a gift, and because of that, I want to, I want to wear that gift well.

[00:54:06 – 00:54:11] I want to be somebody who reflects the, the value of sobriety.

[00:54:11 – 00:54:25] I want to be somebody that f- folks could take a look at and say, “You know, I wouldn’t mind doing what that guy does.” I don’t want somebody to look at me and say, “For God’s sake, if that’s what it is, I don’t want it.” No, I can’t quite see it that way.

[00:54:25 – 00:54:28] You know, I want to reflect that gift.

[00:54:28 – 00:54:34] I want to be e- uh, I’ll never be worthy of it, but I want to, I want to be as worthy as I can.

[00:54:34 – 00:54:38] I, I want to be mindful of the value of that gift.

[00:54:38 – 00:54:46] And then the other thing I, I, I, I do, I, I pray for, for to…

[00:54:46 – 00:54:51] not for opportunity, but I pray to be sensitive to opportunities to be of service.

[00:54:51 – 00:55:02] And I’ll tell you something, you will travel very few yards before you see somebody that need of service.

[00:55:02 – 00:55:07] It’s not always money or physical assistance.

[00:55:07 – 00:55:12] Sometimes a kind word is priceless.

[00:55:12 – 00:55:15] Greeting.

[00:55:15 – 00:55:17] Smile for God sakes.

[00:55:17 – 00:55:21] You know, just simple little things.

[00:55:21 – 00:55:28] You know, and if I’m, if I’m not sensitive to those things, I’ll walk right past gross need and not even see it.

[00:55:28 – 00:55:32] But if I’m sensitive to it, sometimes I’ll pick up on it.

[00:55:32 – 00:55:34] Very often I’ll pick up on it.

[00:55:34 – 00:55:36] And so that’s what I want to do.

[00:55:36 – 00:55:40] You know, what that does is that shapes the way I try to live every day of my life.

[00:55:40 – 00:55:48] And I’m no paragon of virtue or, or humility or excellence or anything like that.

[00:55:48 – 00:55:49] I’m, I’m just another human being.

[00:55:49 – 00:55:58] But I treat every person that I meet, everybody, like a lady or a gentleman.

[00:55:58 – 00:56:03] I don’t care what they are, because it isn’t about them, it’s about me.

[00:56:03 – 00:56:07] Now, everybody I meet is not a lady or a gentleman.

[00:56:07 – 00:56:11] I, I, I meet a jerk once in a while, but I tell you the darn truth, darn few.

[00:56:11 – 00:56:16] I meet darn few jerks, and I certainly got enough sense to get away from one.

[00:56:16 – 00:56:22] Yeah, I don’t hang out with people that’s got nothing to do but chop up and gossip and, and, and beat people up.

[00:56:22 – 00:56:23] I have no time for that.

[00:56:23 – 00:56:24] I have no…

[00:56:24 – 00:56:24] I want…

[00:56:24 – 00:56:28] I don’t want to invest any of my attention to garbage like that.

[00:56:28 – 00:56:33] And so I, that’s the way I go through my life and, and try to handle myself.

[00:56:33 – 00:56:40] And, and so what that does just gives me absolutely marvelous, marvelous experiences that, that just defy imagination.

[00:56:40 – 00:56:46] And, um, I, I, I tell you, just, just a couple of things that come out, come out of that.

[00:56:46 – 00:56:52] And I, I already told you I’m a manipulator, but I don’t think I do that for m- for manipulative purposes.

[00:56:52 – 00:56:54] That I don’t really need to.

[00:56:54 – 00:56:58] There is enough spontaneous response, you don’t need to sort of hoodoo people.

[00:56:58 – 00:57:01] I, I’ll tell you the kind of thing that happens routinely with me.

[00:57:01 – 00:57:03] I’ll give you a real fresh one.

[00:57:03 – 00:57:04] I…

[00:57:04 – 00:57:06] My wife is a person…

[00:57:06 – 00:57:07] She’s not here.

[00:57:07 – 00:57:08] She got…

[00:57:08 – 00:57:11] I’m gonna chance it, she’s not here.

[00:57:11 – 00:57:14] My wife, uh, likes to sin a little.

[00:57:14 – 00:57:22] And, uh, that’s, uh, that’s one reason I bring her to Las Vegas, because she likes to come out here and sin big time.

[00:57:22 – 00:57:26] She keeps on, I won’t buy any more ponds, I tell you that.

[00:57:26 – 00:57:27] She, she…

[00:57:27 – 00:57:30] No, she’s pretty good at it, really.

[00:57:30 – 00:57:36] And, uh, um, we came a couple of days early, and we got a, got a, a s- got…

[00:57:36 – 00:57:39] I never had stayed o- over at th- this particular hotel.

[00:57:39 – 00:57:42] I won’t put their business on the street, but they, uh, they probably wouldn’t mind.

[00:57:42 – 00:57:44] But I won’t, I won’t do it anyway.

[00:57:44 – 00:57:47] The, uh, we checked into this place, and it’s a nice hotel.

[00:57:47 – 00:57:49] I, I’d never stayed there.

[00:57:49 – 00:57:51] And, uh, we had booked a suite.

[00:57:51 – 00:57:55] And, uh, and it, it had a g- really great price on it.

[00:57:55 – 00:58:00] And so when we checked in and got to kidding around with a girl from, she was from Texas.

[00:58:00 – 00:58:04] She went, “Clancy?” She was from Big Springs, Texas.

[00:58:04 – 00:58:05] Oh.

[00:58:05 – 00:58:09] Said, “Just what?” I told her, I said, “Girl, that place is famous.

[00:58:09 – 00:58:19] Man, you are the home of the state nuthouse.” And she said, “Really?” I said, “Yeah, really.” So we, we just got kidding around, you know.

[00:58:19 – 00:58:24] Just, uh, she had a whole bunch of wild tourists just scrambling all over the place trying to get to the machines or something.

[00:58:24 – 00:58:27] And, uh, so we just kidded around a little bit.

[00:58:27 – 00:58:31] And she gave us, if it was not…

[00:58:31 – 00:58:36] She upgraded us to a suite that was $150 more than the one we had.

[00:58:36 – 00:58:38] And I didn’t even ask for it.

[00:58:38 – 00:58:42] I mean, we had a suite that had the…

[00:58:42 – 00:58:46] If it wasn’t the best one in that hotel, it would have certainly been with the best one.

[00:58:47 – 00:58:50] We had a view of Las Vegas, man, you could see to Colorado.

[00:58:50 – 00:58:55] It, it was abso- was absolutely marvelous, just marvelous.

[00:58:55 – 00:58:56] And nothing to it.

[00:58:56 – 00:59:09] She said, “I can’t give you to this thing but one night.” So I stopped and thought about it the next day, and I told the girl, I said, “Now, I know I’m supposed to move, but it won’t make me mad if I don’t move.” We didn’t move.

[00:59:09 – 00:59:18] I mean, man, we lived like King Tut over there, and- It, it just happens all the time.

[00:59:18 – 00:59:21] I, d- The, uh…

[00:59:21 – 00:59:28] Tell, I’ll tell you, uh, you, what happens when, uh, you, you get into a, to a deal like that.

[00:59:28 – 00:59:30] What the, what the, um…

[00:59:30 – 00:59:35] It, it’s, it’s that spirit- it’s a spiritual condition.

[00:59:35 – 00:59:42] Tell you the first time I ever got it into focus and, and kind of understood what, what was happening in my life when I, when I tried to practice that kind of stuff.

[00:59:42 – 00:59:46] I, I was up, I was at, at O’Hare one day in Chicago.

[00:59:46 – 00:59:50] I was, I was on the way to f- to f- February, and I’m on the way to Fargo, North Dakota.

[00:59:50 – 00:59:57] And, uh, and we, and we got some fine young Turks from Fargo here, uh, that, uh, we’re really glad to see those guys.

[00:59:57 – 00:59:58] I’m gonna visit them this spring.

[00:59:58 – 01:00:04] But I was on the way to Fargo in F- in February, and I will assure you that is no thrill.

[01:00:04 – 01:00:05] No thrill.

[01:00:05 – 01:00:15] And so I’m, I’m walking d- I’m walking down the concourse in, in, at O’Hare, and I, I realized I was grinning.

[01:00:15 – 01:00:18] Well, you don’t grin in airports.

[01:00:18 – 01:00:21] I’m, I mean, nobody grins in airports.

[01:00:21 – 01:00:24] Man, they’ll put a net on you if you start grinning in there.

[01:00:24 – 01:00:28] You know, there’s an airport persona.

[01:00:28 – 01:00:38] You’ve got to be mad, and you got to and you got to be focused, and you got to be dema- And, well, I’m going down there gr- grinning down the concourse.

[01:00:38 – 01:00:42] And when I realized it, I, I almost wanted to blush.

[01:00:42 – 01:00:44] You know, I felt embarrassed that I’m grinning.

[01:00:44 – 01:00:48] And, uh, so I put on my game face and, and kept walking.

[01:00:48 – 01:00:51] But then I got thinking about that.

[01:00:51 – 01:00:53] Why on earth am I grinning?

[01:00:53 – 01:00:56] You know, I’m in O’Hare, and I just hate wandering around that…

[01:00:56 – 01:00:58] Well, charging through that place.

[01:00:58 – 01:01:01] And, um, and I’m grinning.

[01:01:01 – 01:01:02] Now, why in the world was I grinning?

[01:01:02 – 01:01:22] There was a guy that some of you might have heard of, uh, from North Carolina, a fine young man named Michael Jordan, who, uh, played a little bit of sandlot basketball and, uh, achieved some notoriety.

[01:01:22 – 01:01:23] He, he was…

[01:01:23 – 01:01:28] I, I know everybody in the world remembers this, this thing I’m gonna, I’m gonna re- remind you of.

[01:01:28 – 01:01:36] He was playing a game one day against somebody, and he, he was…

[01:01:36 – 01:01:38] It was one of those blind days, you know?

[01:01:38 – 01:01:42] He could throw it over his shoulder from mid-court blindfolded, and it’d go.

[01:01:42 – 01:01:44] I mean, he was missing nothing.

[01:01:44 – 01:01:53] And, and at one point, he finished a goal, and he was trotting down the court, and he looked over at the opposing bench, and he gave it that…

[01:01:53 – 01:01:56] Don’t ask me, man.

[01:01:56 – 01:01:57] Don’t ask me.

[01:01:57 – 01:02:09] And later on, he described his, his makeup that day as being in a zone, and that term caught on.

[01:02:09 – 01:02:11] It’s still widely in use.

[01:02:11 – 01:02:15] And when I thought about why was I grinning in Chicago, that’s what I was.

[01:02:15 – 01:02:16] I was in a zone.

[01:02:16 – 01:02:26] I was in a zone, where I’m just on a spiritual j- just a spiritual kind of a, a place, and it, and it came down to three things.

[01:02:26 – 01:02:31] One, I was exactly who I’m supposed to be.

[01:02:31 – 01:02:34] That same guy I’m talking about out by the pond.

[01:02:34 – 01:02:35] That’s who I was.

[01:02:35 – 01:02:37] I was exactly who I’m supposed to be.

[01:02:37 – 01:02:40] No sham, no pretense, no pushing people around.

[01:02:40 – 01:02:42] I am who I’m supposed to be.

[01:02:42 – 01:02:46] And I’m where I’m supposed to be.

[01:02:46 – 01:02:52] I’m on the way to Fargo, North Dakota, to try to carry the message to some fellow alcoholics.

[01:02:52 – 01:02:53] That’s where I’m supposed to be.

[01:02:53 – 01:02:58] And I was doing exactly what I’m supposed to be doing.

[01:02:58 – 01:03:04] That produces a zone.

[01:03:04 – 01:03:10] That’s the spiritual life when it’s really clicking and everything’s on go.

[01:03:10 – 01:03:13] And in that kind of a deal, amazing things happen.

[01:03:13 – 01:03:15] That happened to me on the golf course one time.

[01:03:15 – 01:03:22] That, uh, never has happened again, but I was playing- I was, uh, I was, I was…

[01:03:22 – 01:03:34] I used to play f- not good, but pretty decent, and I was playing one day, just practicing, and a guy sponsored, an old, older fella, and, uh, uh, my age was playing over there and, and another older fella.

[01:03:34 – 01:03:39] And, and so I went over and he said, “Come play with us.” And I said, “Okay, fine.” I went over and played with them.

[01:03:39 – 01:03:42] Well, my God, I mean, the poor old guys couldn’t hit it out of their shadow.

[01:03:42 – 01:03:49] And, uh, and so I’m just kind of laying back, you know, just sort of, sort of easily going along.

[01:03:49 – 01:03:53] I got on the eighth hole, and I realized I was three under par.

[01:03:53 – 01:03:58] I birdied the next hole, which put me four under par.

[01:03:58 – 01:04:06] And for non-golfers, that, that means, that means four strokes better than the course was supposed to play when you play it just right.

[01:04:06 – 01:04:08] That- That means good.

[01:04:08 – 01:04:11] That usually means payday for a pro.

[01:04:11 – 01:04:16] And that, when I walked in, I learned I had tied the course record.

[01:04:16 – 01:04:21] So I’m eating my obligatory hot dog.

[01:04:21 – 01:04:28] And, uh, and, and I’m thinking to myself, “You wait till I get on that back nine, man.

[01:04:28 – 01:04:30] I am gonna beat this sucker.

[01:04:30 – 01:04:33] I’m bringing this course to its knees,” you know?

[01:04:33 – 01:04:41] I almost set the course record the other way when I took over.

[01:04:41 – 01:04:44] I, I lost…

[01:04:44 – 01:04:44] I was…

[01:04:44 – 01:04:50] Well, it wasn’t measured in golf, but I was 15 strokes worse with me and John.

[01:04:50 – 01:04:52] And, but it doesn’t matter because that, and that’s all it was.

[01:04:52 – 01:04:55] When I was in that zone, I wasn’t straining, I wasn’t doing anything.

[01:04:55 – 01:04:59] I was just kind of naturally staying within my limits and all that, and things just worked well.

[01:04:59 – 01:05:00] The same way with life.

[01:05:00 – 01:05:09] You know, if I can just get tuned in, plugged in so that I’m just naturally following the, the power that guides me, my God, amazing things happen.

[01:05:09 – 01:05:11] Yeah, in Portland…

[01:05:11 – 01:05:14] I, and I could tell you 1,000 of these, man, would love to.

[01:05:14 – 01:05:17] Up in Portland a while back, I was…

[01:05:17 – 01:05:19] We, uh, had a double header.

[01:05:19 – 01:05:23] I, I was gonna be in Portland one week and Van- or Vancouver one week and Portland the next.

[01:05:23 – 01:05:28] So I thought we’d be smart and got the madam, who she knew the casino was up there, too.

[01:05:28 – 01:05:29] And so she…

[01:05:29 – 01:05:35] We, we went to Portland and got a car, drove to Vancouver and then back, and it was cheaper for everybody.

[01:05:35 – 01:05:37] And, uh, it was wonderful for us.

[01:05:37 – 01:05:39] So we, we, we took…

[01:05:39 – 01:05:41] And when we went in to check in to get a car…

[01:05:41 – 01:05:43] Now, you know how it is checking in cars at airports.

[01:05:43 – 01:05:45] You know, you, you might, you might well be talking to a robot.

[01:05:45 – 01:05:47] I mean, they’re not gonna pay too much attention who’s there.

[01:05:47 – 01:05:52] So there was a little girl there, and we just started visiting a little bit and, and messing around.

[01:05:52 – 01:05:54] I couldn’t mess around much.

[01:05:54 – 01:05:56] The wife was right there watching every move.

[01:05:56 – 01:06:00] But just, just messing.

[01:06:00 – 01:06:01] And she, this little girl said…

[01:06:01 – 01:06:06] I c- I can’t remember the name of this thing, but we had ordered a Yugo.

[01:06:06 – 01:06:12] I mean, we we wanted a real bargain basement deal.

[01:06:12 – 01:06:14] So we ordered something we could barely get in.

[01:06:14 – 01:06:17] And, uh, so the little girl checks this.

[01:06:17 – 01:06:32] She said, “Would you do me a favor?” I said, “Yeah, what?” She said, “Will you take an Oldsmobile something that’s one of those big old tall SUV things that they charge a ton for?” And I said, “Oh, God.

[01:06:32 – 01:06:36] People always want me to do stuff.” And I said, “All right, all right, I’ll do it.

[01:06:36 – 01:06:44] I’ll, I’ll, I’ll help you out.” She said, “Man, I really appreciate that.” Well, by God, here’s a luxury car at the same price.

[01:06:44 – 01:06:46] Same price.

[01:06:46 – 01:06:48] Call it serendipity.

[01:06:48 – 01:06:54] I call it a product of just the way you carry yourself and, and, and how you pres- present yourself.

[01:06:54 – 01:06:56] Just, just amazing stuff happens.

[01:06:56 – 01:06:58] And I’m not looking for that.

[01:06:58 – 01:06:59] I’m not looking for that.

[01:06:59 – 01:07:04] But this world becomes a friendly place when I approach it in that spirit.

[01:07:04 – 01:07:07] It’s amazing how it, how, how that works.

[01:07:07 – 01:07:09] And, uh, so…

[01:07:09 – 01:07:17] And all that is to me is this thing of putting, get- putting legs on prayer and meditation so that it starts to, to, to drive the way we live.

[01:07:17 – 01:07:19] You know, yeah, I mentioned a thing.

[01:07:19 – 01:07:21] I’ll, I’ll tell you one other story, and I, I love to tell stories.

[01:07:21 – 01:07:25] I, I can, I can make a point easier with a story than I can philosophizing all day.

[01:07:25 – 01:07:27] It takes less time, too.

[01:07:27 – 01:07:36] Um, I, I’ll tell you one other one about, about what that does and this thing of, of how you, how I wanna carry myself in, in the, in the, uh, in the world.

[01:07:36 – 01:07:38] The, um…

[01:07:38 – 01:07:43] One day we were, uh, in, in the lobby of a Hampton Inn.

[01:07:43 – 01:07:47] We had some people in town, and we were gonna put on a district workshop, and I was chairing the workshop.

[01:07:47 – 01:07:49] So we had everybody around a table.

[01:07:49 – 01:07:51] We were, we were fat-mouthing and planning the meeting.

[01:07:51 – 01:07:53] And I noticed…

[01:07:53 – 01:08:02] It wasn’t paying attention, but I, I noticed there was an older couple beside us in a, at next table, and then they went over and checked out, and they came back to our table and stopped.

[01:08:02 – 01:08:05] And, uh, the lady was the more forward of the two.

[01:08:05 – 01:08:09] She s- she, and she knew, she, she, she recognized that I was chairing the meeting, so she said…

[01:08:09 – 01:08:24] She stopped, and I said, uh, I said, “Hello.” And, and she said, “We didn’t mean to be eavesdropping, but we were.” And, uh, said, “You mind telling me what you folks are doing?” I said, “No, not at all.

[01:08:24 – 01:08:26] No, we’re, we’re planning a meeting.

[01:08:26 – 01:08:34] We’re gonna be doing a meeting downtown here in a little while, and, uh, we’re planning the meeting.” She said, “What’s it about?” And I said, “It’s about service.” “Oh,” she said, “that’s good.

[01:08:34 – 01:08:54] And in relation to what?” And I said, “Alcoholics Anonymous.” And she said, “Man, that’s wonderful.” And, and then she said, “We had been remarking to each other that you guys were the most intensely focused people we had ever seen doing this,” doing what was obviously a, kind of a, a little meeting.

[01:08:54 – 01:08:58] And, and I thought later how much I appreciated it.

[01:08:58 – 01:09:01] Thank God I wasn’t just telling dirty jokes.

[01:09:01 – 01:09:05] You know, thank God I wasn’t just trying to see who could out-cuss who.

[01:09:05 – 01:09:16] Thank God, if I’m gonna do my business in public or if I’m gonna let, uh, the, the, the, the, my activities at Alcoholics Anonymous get observed, thank God that this was one time.

[01:09:16 – 01:09:23] I guarantee you, that woman and that man would have recommended the Pope to Alcoholics Anonymous.

[01:09:23 – 01:09:25] Without hesitation.

[01:09:25 – 01:09:28] Let me contrast that to a different, different thing.

[01:09:28 – 01:09:30] Because it’s not always that way.

[01:09:30 – 01:09:34] I was at a conference, and Madam was with me.

[01:09:34 – 01:09:36] I was out at a conference out in Ten- Ten- Tennessee.

[01:09:36 – 01:09:41] I, and, um, and the, and sometimes things just don’t go…

[01:09:41 – 01:09:42] And this one went well.

[01:09:42 – 01:09:44] You can relax now, Bob.

[01:09:44 – 01:09:48] The, uh, th- that one didn’t.

[01:09:48 – 01:09:50] And they, they, uh…

[01:09:50 – 01:09:53] On Saturday night, they had a guy speaking.

[01:09:53 – 01:09:55] I was on Sunday morning, and they, and they had a guy…

[01:09:55 – 01:09:58] My specialty is, is closing down parties.

[01:09:58 – 01:10:01] I mean, I c- I put an end to a lot of parties.

[01:10:01 – 01:10:09] I go they, they had this guy on Saturday night, and he thought he was supposed to be a stand-up comedian.

[01:10:09 – 01:10:12] I’d, I’d never seen him before or since, thank God.

[01:10:12 – 01:10:19] And the, the, the poor fella was going all out, but he was not funny at all.

[01:10:19 – 01:10:26] And, and you know how it is when you’re going down the pipe, you just start scrambling and clutching at straws, you know.

[01:10:26 – 01:10:29] And so the harder he tried, the worse he got.

[01:10:29 – 01:10:37] And good God, he got, not only X-rated, this guy got profane and vulgar and disgusting.

[01:10:37 – 01:10:53] And I just happened to be sitting behind the lady who was the program chair, the one who invited the speakers, and there was a man sitting beside her, and I was just fascinated with that guy’s neck because it just looked like a thermometer.

[01:10:53 – 01:10:54] You, you could just see it.

[01:10:54 – 01:10:56] It get, getting red.

[01:10:56 – 01:10:58] And his, his ears were glowing.

[01:10:58 – 01:11:21] And I, I said, “Uh-oh.” And so after the meeting, I found, I found her, and I said, uh, “Your friend didn’t seem to enjoy that meeting too much.” And she said, “Tom, you will never know how embarrassed I am.” She says, “I have never been more humiliated in my life.” That guy was her minister- …

[01:11:21 – 01:11:26] attending his first meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[01:11:26 – 01:11:27] Oh.

[01:11:27 – 01:11:32] And I’ll absolutely guarantee you it was his last meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[01:11:32 – 01:11:36] That dude wouldn’t have, wouldn’t have recommended AA.

[01:11:36 – 01:11:39] He’d have recommended somebody to hell before he would AA.

[01:11:39 – 01:11:42] See what I’m talking about?

[01:11:42 – 01:11:48] That, you know, now that was just one of those unfortunate things that happens, but you never know.

[01:11:48 – 01:11:51] It’s like when I’m speaking to a group, I’m a pretty clean guy.

[01:11:51 – 01:11:54] Yeah, I’m a pretty clean guy when I’m not speaking to a group.

[01:11:54 – 01:11:58] But I particularly am when I’m speaking to a group because I don’t know who’s here.

[01:11:58 – 01:12:00] You may have your mother here.

[01:12:00 – 01:12:02] You may have your child here.

[01:12:02 – 01:12:10] This is an open conference, and I’m not gonna embarrass you or humiliate you or make you feel ashamed of the fellowship you belong in.

[01:12:10 – 01:12:12] I’m gonna try to be an example.

[01:12:12 – 01:12:17] If you ask me to be an example in the shared experience, I’m gonna try to do that in a dignified kind of way.

[01:12:17 – 01:12:18] I have a good time.

[01:12:18 – 01:12:24] But I’ll guarantee you, I’m not gonna get off the wall and, and push you up to your limits on, on what your tolerance is.

[01:12:24 – 01:12:26] I’m gonna try to be a, an example.

[01:12:26 – 01:12:38] So a lot, a lot of good stuff hap- happens in, in that, in, in that thing of, of, of taking a spiritual life and, and really putting it to play as a way…

[01:12:38 – 01:12:40] You know, I believe in the 11th step.

[01:12:40 – 01:12:53] If I take this conscientiously, if I take the action of the 11th step conscientiously, I, I think what it does is that it, it will open the avenue to an area of service that is right for you.

[01:12:53 – 01:12:59] I think there’s an avenue of service that’s right for everybody.

[01:12:59 – 01:13:08] I believe that whoever you are, I believe that there’s somebody needs to hear your story.

[01:13:08 – 01:13:11] Not mine, yours.

[01:13:11 – 01:13:19] And I think it’s the 11th step is what opens the door and starts to generate this movement into service.

[01:13:19 – 01:13:23] A- and if you’ve got a heart to serve, it’ll open up for you.

[01:13:23 – 01:13:24] God knows what it’ll be.

[01:13:24 – 01:13:34] I, I was making, making a talk at a, down on the coast of North Carolina a while back, and I was talking about CPC, Co- Cooperative Professional Committee.

[01:13:34 – 01:13:37] And, uh, after the meeting, there was a fella…

[01:13:37 – 01:13:42] And, and I just as a matter of, of course, I, to, I, I knew what the answer was gonna be.

[01:13:42 – 01:13:45] I said, “By the way,” I didn’t define CPC.

[01:13:45 – 01:13:45] I just said it.

[01:13:45 – 01:13:58] And I said, “By the way, would, would all of you who are involved in CPC,” and there are two, about 200 people in the room, “uh, just raise your hand so I can get a feel for the kind of action you got going.” One person raised their hand out of 200.

[01:13:58 – 01:14:19] Well, after the meeting, a fella came up to me and he said, he said, “Tom, I’d like to ask you about something.” I said, “Yeah, what?” He said, “I’ve been sober 22 years, and I’m ashamed to admit it, but I’ve never done any service whatsoever.” And he said, “I, I can’t figure out what to do.” I said, “Well, tell

[01:14:19 – 01:14:21] me what you did before you came to AA.

[01:14:21 – 01:14:22] What, what’s your profession?

[01:14:22 – 01:14:31] What, what’s your career?” And he said, “I’m a CPA, a certified public accountant.” And I said, “My God, man.

[01:14:31 – 01:14:34] They’ve got dopes like me counting the money.

[01:14:34 – 01:14:37] Jesus.” “Hey, we got a place for you.

[01:14:37 – 01:14:39] Jesus, get in here.

[01:14:39 – 01:14:41] You’re a…” But, but everybody’s got tools.

[01:14:41 – 01:14:42] Everybody’s got talents.

[01:14:42 – 01:14:44] Everybody’s got something to offer.

[01:14:44 – 01:14:49] They’re not all the same, but this step will open the avenue of service.