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[00:00:08.300 – 00:00:12.000] But getting back to that saying, the last, uh, the best for last.

[00:00:12.000 – 00:00:22.000] We’ve been very fortunate on the program that has been presented to us

[00:00:22.000 – 00:00:23.000] throughout this meeting.

[00:00:23.000 – 00:00:32.900] We’re indeed fortunate here in Oklahoma to have with us on this occasion, one of the co-founders of the movement of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:00:32.900 – 00:00:37.500] He doesn’t need much of an introduction to anybody.

[00:00:37.500 – 00:00:41.400] And I’m happy at this time to present Bill.

[00:00:41.400 – 00:01:06.000] In

[00:01:06.000 – 00:01:16.300] this fine hour, I know that we are all possessed with a great emotion, and that is gratitude

[00:01:16.300 – 00:01:26.400] for the wholesale miracle that has befallen the children of the night, we of the fellowship

[00:01:26.400 – 00:01:28.700] of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:01:28.700 – 00:01:39.200] And our compelling thought in these happy days just past has been

[00:01:39.200 – 00:01:44.700] how best can we serve the ends of this society?

[00:01:44.700 – 00:01:55.000] In gratitude, we praise God, whose grace has

[00:01:55.000 – 00:01:57.300] made this thing possible.

[00:01:57.300 – 00:02:07.500] And immediately, we think of the great numbers of people and circumstances

[00:02:07.500 – 00:02:15.300] who have formed this fellowship, who have composed this happy conspiracy.

[00:02:15.300 – 00:02:20.600] We think of our friends of medicine.

[00:02:20.600 – 00:02:24.100] We think of our friends of religion.

[00:02:24.100 – 00:02:35.800] For, as you must know, AA is something like a farmer’s three-legged milk stool, supported

[00:02:35.800 – 00:02:45.800] in one side by what we have learned from medicine, on another corner by what we have drawn from religion.

[00:02:45.800 – 00:02:56.300] And the other leg, of course, is our own experience of drinking and recovery, a

[00:02:56.300 – 00:03:01.300] synthetic concept that has made all its points.

[00:03:01.300 – 00:03:10.200] So to all of our friends in medicine and religion who are present, we gratefully acknowledge our debt.

[00:03:10.200 – 00:03:20.400] And perchance, there are some of the men and women of the press here who have been carriers

[00:03:20.400 – 00:03:24.200] over the past years of our message to all the world.

[00:03:24.200 – 00:03:33.400] And never a syllable of ridicule or criticism have these ever written of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:03:33.400 – 00:03:43.800] Their work has made possible the recovery of tens of thousands of

[00:03:43.800 – 00:03:44.800] afflicted ones.

[00:03:44.800 – 00:03:49.300] So to them, our deep thanks.

[00:03:49.300 – 00:03:59.400] And we think of the host of other friends we have, the goodwill of the citizens of this town, of

[00:03:59.400 – 00:04:07.600] those in government, of those in many places whose goodwill means so much to us.

[00:04:07.600 – 00:04:17.700] What a fine expression that just was, that four of the citizens should come in here to make

[00:04:17.700 – 00:04:27.700] us know that we are now respectable ones, to make us feel needed and wanted in this

[00:04:27.700 – 00:04:28.200] community.

[00:04:28.200 – 00:04:36.700] In fact, is it not a rather singular circumstance that a gentleman from the sheriff’s office should be seen to a bunch of drunks?

[00:04:36.700 – 00:04:37.600] Did you ever thought of that?

[00:04:37.600 – 00:04:48.200] And speaking of my own special reason for gratitude,

[00:04:48.200 – 00:04:58.500] I find no words to describe my feelings about what has happened

[00:04:58.500 – 00:05:08.800] here as I bring you congratulations from AAs all over the Earth, for

[00:05:08.800 – 00:05:14.400] today, the sun never sets upon the Society of Alcoholics Anonymous.

[00:05:14.400 – 00:05:21.500] And these send you their greetings and their brotherhood and their affection.

[00:05:21.500 – 00:05:31.800] And I thank all who have made this happy event possible, those whose labors

[00:05:31.800 – 00:05:41.900] have been unseen, but which have flowered in this wonderful occasion and the hospitality you have extended

[00:05:41.900 – 00:05:42.400] to me.

[00:05:42.400 – 00:05:52.500] Alcoholics Anonymous is now about sixteen years old, and

[00:05:52.500 – 00:06:03.300] yet we sense that we have passed through three periods: a period of infancy,

[00:06:03.300 – 00:06:12.700] a period of adolescence, and now we think- upon the threshold of maturity and face our future.

[00:06:12.700 – 00:06:16.900] We are now taking destiny by the hand.

[00:06:16.900 – 00:06:27.800] So I think it would serve the purposes of this meeting if I led you through

[00:06:27.800 – 00:06:37.200] the years of infancy, during which time we developed the principles and applied the principles upon which individual recovery starts.

[00:06:37.200 – 00:06:48.200] Then I took you through that exciting period of adolescence when we lived and worked together, during

[00:06:48.200 – 00:06:58.400] which time the tradition of Alcoholics Anonymous was generated, that body of principles, of group

[00:06:58.400 – 00:07:04.600] concepts which we hope may contain us in unity for so long as God shall need it.

[00:07:04.600 – 00:07:14.700] And I would specially like then to emphasize the fact that without Alcoholics Anonymous, faith

[00:07:14.700 – 00:07:17.100] is dead without works.

[00:07:17.100 – 00:07:22.600] In other words, this is a society of action.

[00:07:22.600 – 00:07:25.800] Action is the mo- is the magic word.

[00:07:25.800 – 00:07:36.300] So I would like to dwell a bit upon the whole idea of service as we now see it, as it applies to what I hope

[00:07:36.300 – 00:07:39.100] will be a great and happy future.

[00:07:39.100 – 00:07:49.200] For some sixteen years now, you and I have been watching a great

[00:07:49.200 – 00:07:50.800] building under construction.

[00:07:50.800 – 00:07:59.100] To us of Alcoholics Anonymous, this is something more than a building.

[00:07:59.100 – 00:08:09.200] This to us is a veritable cathedral of the spirit into which a hundred and twenty thousand of

[00:08:09.200 – 00:08:20.100] us have now entered, and herein have found peace, and a brotherhood, and a freedom of

[00:08:20.100 – 00:08:24.200] which we could never have dreamed in yesteryear.

[00:08:24.200 – 00:08:34.400] So let me take you back now to the very beginning, leading you down through our infancy and adolescence

[00:08:34.400 – 00:08:44.500] to where we are now, marking as we go those important realizations and

[00:08:44.500 – 00:08:52.000] decisions which have so deeply affected our destiny.

[00:08:52.000 – 00:09:02.000] In a sense, AA has just been a succession of realizations and decisions taken by individuals and

[00:09:02.000 – 00:09:03.200] groups of individuals.

[00:09:03.200 – 00:09:07.200] Let us see what some of those were.

[00:09:07.200 – 00:09:17.300] In the summer of 1934, I lay in a hospital devoted to the

[00:09:17.300 – 00:09:18.200] care of alcoholics.

[00:09:18.200 – 00:09:29.000] It was the end of a long road, and for the first time, I understood the

[00:09:29.000 – 00:09:32.400] futility of my position.

[00:09:32.400 – 00:09:35.900] I knew that I was utterly hopeless.

[00:09:35.900 – 00:09:41.600] I knew that I had no power of my own to go on living.

[00:09:41.600 – 00:09:51.900] And that verdict had been pronounced by science, which it said, “The alcoholic

[00:09:51.900 – 00:10:02.400] is one who has an obsession which condemns him to drink against his will, an increasing physical sensitivity that

[00:10:02.400 – 00:10:13.600] condemns him in time to go mad or die.” And those terrible facts in my case had

[00:10:13.600 – 00:10:20.400] come home to me in flood tide as I lay there on my bed.

[00:10:20.400 – 00:10:30.400] So, without realizing it, I

[00:10:30.500 – 00:10:41.100] was having a realization that is absolutely indispensable to each one of us before we may make any progress to recovery,

[00:10:41.100 – 00:10:45.700] a realization which has been shared by every alcoholic in this room.

[00:10:45.700 – 00:10:50.600] I had hit bottom and knew it.

[00:10:50.600 – 00:10:55.500] I was not the only one who shared this realization.

[00:10:55.500 – 00:11:05.800] Downstairs in the hospital, a famous doctor was talking to Lois, my dear wife.

[00:11:05.800 – 00:11:15.700] And like many a woman before and since, she was asking these questions.

[00:11:15.700 – 00:11:22.600] She was saying, “Doctor, for years, Bill has wanted to stop.

[00:11:22.600 – 00:11:26.800] He has desperately wanted to stop.

[00:11:26.800 – 00:11:29.600] He has been willing to do anything.

[00:11:29.600 – 00:11:33.900] Now, Doctor, Bill was always a man of great willpower.

[00:11:33.900 – 00:11:39.700] In other matters, why doesn’t his willpower work now?

[00:11:39.700 – 00:11:43.100] Why can’t he stop, Doctor?

[00:11:43.100 – 00:11:53.300] And Doctor, how serious is this business?” And the good man was compelled

[00:11:53.300 – 00:12:03.300] to tell her that my habit of drinking had slowly turned into an obsession, a veritable

[00:12:03.300 – 00:12:10.400] insanity which condemned me as much to drink as a kleptomaniac is condemned to steal.

[00:12:10.400 – 00:12:22.100] And that my physical condition had deteriorated, perhaps my brain already a little, and

[00:12:22.100 – 00:12:26.900] that that was the age-old dilemma of alcoholics.

[00:12:26.900 – 00:12:40.300] And like many another woman, Lois said, “Well, what does that mean, doctor?” Gentleman

[00:12:40.300 – 00:12:43.400] that he was, he had to tell her, “It means, Mrs.

[00:12:43.400 – 00:12:53.900] Wilson, that you must soon put him away somewhere, else he will go mad or die.” So

[00:12:53.900 – 00:13:05.400] this realization of hopelessness, now so important to every one of our society and embodied in our, the very first step of the AA program, came

[00:13:05.400 – 00:13:09.100] not only to me, but to one very near and dear.

[00:13:09.100 – 00:13:16.600] How well you women and husbands of alcoholics know.

[00:13:16.600 – 00:13:25.200] Leaving the hospital, I was very badly frightened.

[00:13:25.200 – 00:13:29.300] For a time, great vigilance kept me sober.

[00:13:29.300 – 00:13:35.400] But little by little, as I felt better, my fear wore away.

[00:13:35.400 – 00:13:41.600] And in November of that year, the obsession had me.

[00:13:41.600 – 00:13:48.900] There I was alone, drinking in my kitchen, Lois working in a department store to support me.

[00:13:48.900 – 00:13:54.600] I no longer dared go in the streets, lest I be taken up by the police.

[00:13:54.600 – 00:14:04.600] Drinking a fifth of gin to be high per day, two

[00:14:04.600 – 00:14:06.500] to be tight, and three to be drunk.

[00:14:06.500 – 00:14:08.400] Drunk most of the time.

[00:14:08.400 – 00:14:09.600] Tense.

[00:14:09.600 – 00:14:12.100] Could not stop.

[00:14:12.100 – 00:14:22.200] Well, at that juncture, a friend I hadn’t seen in many years had a realization, and

[00:14:22.200 – 00:14:23.300] he took a decision.

[00:14:23.300 – 00:14:28.800] He, too, had been visited by this dire malady.

[00:14:28.800 – 00:14:34.200] I had known him to be a hopeless one for a long time.

[00:14:34.200 – 00:14:37.600] Suddenly, the telephone rang.

[00:14:37.600 – 00:14:40.700] Here he was on the o- other end of the wire.

[00:14:40.700 – 00:14:43.400] I knew at once he was sober.

[00:14:43.400 – 00:14:46.500] Had never known him to be in New York City sober.

[00:14:46.500 – 00:14:51.800] And I said, “Come over, Eddie, my friend.

[00:14:51.800 – 00:14:53.400] I’d love to see you.

[00:14:53.400 – 00:15:03.600] We’ll drink together, and we’ll talk about the good old days.” Ah, what a significant remark.

[00:15:03.600 – 00:15:06.400] The good old days indeed.

[00:15:06.400 – 00:15:15.700] For you see, to me, the present was unbearable, and there was to be no future.

[00:15:15.700 – 00:15:20.600] Yes, we’d drink together and talk about the good old days.

[00:15:20.600 – 00:15:28.800] Well, I met him at the door.

[00:15:28.800 – 00:15:36.300] And by some psychic sense, I saw at once that he had something more than just surprise.

[00:15:36.300 – 00:15:38.000] I couldn’t make it out.

[00:15:38.000 – 00:15:41.800] He came in, sat at the kitchen table.

[00:15:41.800 – 00:15:45.900] I pushed over a full tumbler of gin.

[00:15:45.900 – 00:15:51.500] He said, “No, thanks.” I said, “Eddie, what’s got into you?

[00:15:51.500 – 00:15:57.900] You on the water wagon?” “Oh, no, no, I’m just not drinking.” I was puzzled.

[00:15:57.900 – 00:16:00.100] I was disappointed, too.

[00:16:00.100 – 00:16:04.800] We visited a little bit.

[00:16:04.800 – 00:16:08.000] I was very curious.

[00:16:08.000 – 00:16:18.000] I said, “Come, my friend, what’s got into you?” Simply and smilingly, he looked at me and said, “I’ve got religion.”

[00:16:18.000 – 00:16:22.300] I shuddered.

[00:16:22.300 – 00:16:31.700] I said, “Now, this poor boy has substituted alco- uh, religious insanity for alcoholic insanity.

[00:16:31.700 – 00:16:40.300] Too bad.” He may as well have hit me in the face with a wet mop, for I was one of those agnostics.

[00:16:40.300 – 00:16:48.200] I was one whose modern education had told him there is no God.

[00:16:48.200 – 00:16:50.400] Oh, the poor fellow.

[00:16:50.400 – 00:17:00.800] Well, one had to be polite, so I said, “Well, Eddie, uh, what kind of religion have you got?” “Oh,” he said, “I wouldn’t really call it religion.

[00:17:00.800 – 00:17:03.900] You might call it the religion of common sense.

[00:17:03.900 – 00:17:07.300] I just picked up some ideas from a group of people.

[00:17:07.300 – 00:17:12.800] One of them happened to be a drunk like myself, and here they are.

[00:17:12.800 – 00:17:14.500] Very simple ideas.

[00:17:14.500 – 00:17:24.600] None of them new.” He said, “Under their advice, I got honest with myself as I had never been

[00:17:24.600 – 00:17:27.000] before about my personal defects.

[00:17:27.000 – 00:17:36.900] I quit the accursed business of living alone and confessed my defects to another person in confidence.

[00:17:36.900 – 00:17:39.100] Gave me a lot of relief.

[00:17:39.100 – 00:17:49.100] Then I made a survey of my broken relationships and of the damages my drinking had done, and

[00:17:49.100 – 00:17:57.500] I went to all those concerned to make amends, to ask forgiveness,” being careful not to confess their sins inappropriately.

[00:17:57.500 – 00:18:09.700] “And then,” he explained, “they advised me that, uh, I ought to learn of a new kind of gift, a kind of giving that demands no reward.” And

[00:18:09.700 – 00:18:19.700] he said, “Bill, here is the final point of my simple way of life.” I discovered that I could not

[00:18:19.700 – 00:18:29.800] put these principles into daily operation and make them work on my drinking and on my problem of living unless I asked

[00:18:29.800 – 00:18:30.900] God for help.

[00:18:30.900 – 00:18:33.000] Now, said he, “I know that’s sitting.

[00:18:33.000 – 00:18:43.000] Hey, you’re an agnostic, major, but that’s that.” Well, as you see, my friend

[00:18:43.000 – 00:18:44.800] came with no new idea at all.

[00:18:44.800 – 00:18:52.500] I’d certainly heard about honesty, and I’d heard about confession and restitution, and that faith without works is dead.

[00:18:52.500 – 00:18:56.500] I’d even heard about people praying.

[00:18:56.500 – 00:18:57.700] Didn’t like the idea.

[00:18:57.700 – 00:18:59.400] Nothing new.

[00:18:59.400 – 00:19:08.700] Yet somehow, these simple principles presented by him struck me with tremendous force.

[00:19:08.700 – 00:19:10.100] Why?

[00:19:10.100 – 00:19:13.600] And now we uncover another fundamental of AA.

[00:19:13.600 – 00:19:17.600] One alcoholic was talking to another.

[00:19:17.600 – 00:19:25.500] I knew that he had been a denizen of that strange world in which I was living.

[00:19:25.500 – 00:19:35.500] I knew that it was a hopeless world, and I believed it when he said that he had been released from his obsess- uh, from his obsession, that he

[00:19:35.500 – 00:19:39.900] was just no longer on the waterway.

[00:19:39.900 – 00:19:49.900] As he put it, “It seems as though my obsession had been taken from me.” And yet I was revolted at this idea of a

[00:19:49.900 – 00:19:50.400] God.

[00:19:50.400 – 00:19:56.000] Well, very wisely, he didn’t try to evangelize me.

[00:19:56.000 – 00:20:06.200] He just said he thought he’d pay me a call and let me know what had happened to him, thereby exercising what our theological friends call

[00:20:06.200 – 00:20:11.100] the virtual proof, a lesson we’ve had to well learn in AA.

[00:20:11.100 – 00:20:14.900] And presently, he was gone.

[00:20:14.900 – 00:20:24.900] I continued to drink for the next week or two, but in no waking hour could I get the vision of my friend

[00:20:24.900 – 00:20:32.800] out of my mind as he sat across the table, setting out these simple principles to me.

[00:20:32.800 – 00:20:41.900] And at length, I thought to myself, well, after all, who are beggars to be choosy?

[00:20:41.900 – 00:20:47.200] You, Bill Wilson, are just like a cancer victim.

[00:20:47.200 – 00:20:54.300] If you had cancer, you wouldn’t expect to cure it yourself.

[00:20:54.300 – 00:21:04.300] You would depend upon any principle, any surgery, any physician that could check the growth of those terrible

[00:21:04.300 – 00:21:04.900] cells.

[00:21:04.900 – 00:21:15.300] And well do you already know that your alcoholism is a cancer of the emotions,

[00:21:15.300 – 00:21:22.400] a cancer of the mind, and if there be such a thing, a cancer of the soul.

[00:21:22.400 – 00:21:26.900] So who are you to say there is no God?

[00:21:26.900 – 00:21:30.500] Who are you to say how you will get well?

[00:21:30.500 – 00:21:41.400] Just like the cancer patient, you had better be dependent on whatever physician there is who

[00:21:41.400 – 00:21:45.100] can help you.

[00:21:45.100 – 00:21:46.700] So I started for the hospital.

[00:21:46.700 – 00:21:49.500] I thought I’d have the doctor sober me up.

[00:21:49.500 – 00:21:55.100] I would have to look at this religious idea through completely sober eyes.

[00:21:55.100 – 00:21:58.600] I mustn’t have any emotional conversion nonsense.

[00:21:58.600 – 00:22:07.200] I presented myself to 93 Central Park West, my old drying out joint.

[00:22:07.200 – 00:22:12.000] On the way up there, I had got very tight indeed.

[00:22:12.000 – 00:22:13.600] The drunks here will tell you why.

[00:22:13.600 – 00:22:17.600] On our way to be cured for the last time, we always get stiff.

[00:22:17.600 – 00:22:20.200] May never get another drink, you see.

[00:22:20.200 – 00:22:30.100] Through the fog, I could see the doctor, and I waved my bottle at him.

[00:22:30.100 – 00:22:40.300] And I says, “Doctor, at last I’ve got something.” And very sadly, the old man looked at me and said, “My boy,

[00:22:40.300 – 00:22:42.000] I’m afraid you have got something.

[00:22:42.000 – 00:22:49.000] You better go upstairs and go to bed.” Well, I had come to the hospital early.

[00:22:49.000 – 00:22:51.200] Delirium tremens-

[00:22:51.600 – 00:22:53.500] Caught up with me for another month or two.

[00:22:53.500 – 00:23:02.400] So in three or four days’ time, I’m free of liquor and any set it had given.

[00:23:02.400 – 00:23:07.100] But now I’m horribly depressed.

[00:23:07.100 – 00:23:15.700] I kept thinking about my friend, but again, I rebelled about the great position.

[00:23:15.700 – 00:23:19.200] Suddenly, there he stands in the door.

[00:23:19.200 – 00:23:22.200] Here it is early in the morning.

[00:23:22.200 – 00:23:30.100] My first thought was, just as thousands of AAs have since thought, this man practices what he preaches.

[00:23:30.100 – 00:23:33.100] Then I became a little fearful he’d evangelize.

[00:23:33.100 – 00:23:34.600] But no, he’s cool.

[00:23:34.600 – 00:23:38.300] He said, “Bill, I heard you were up here.

[00:23:38.300 – 00:23:49.500] Thought I’d come up, see how you were.” And he made me ask him again, what

[00:23:49.500 – 00:23:51.700] were the terms of his deliverance?

[00:23:51.700 – 00:23:54.500] And quite simply, he stated them.

[00:23:54.500 – 00:24:04.500] “Well,” he said, “Bill, I just got honest with myself, talked it out with another person in confidence, cleared away the debris of my past as

[00:24:04.500 – 00:24:09.800] well as I could, and tried to help other people without any demand for reward.

[00:24:09.800 – 00:24:20.600] Why I’m up here helps me as much as it does you.” And he said, “I pray to God as I understand Him.” And

[00:24:20.600 – 00:24:23.800] that’s all he had to say about it.

[00:24:23.800 – 00:24:26.000] Soon he was gone.

[00:24:26.000 – 00:24:34.500] And then there fell upon me the greatest realization of my whole life.

[00:24:34.500 – 00:24:40.500] My depression increased.

[00:24:40.500 – 00:24:47.300] It seemed that I was in the bottom of an infinite pit.

[00:24:47.300 – 00:24:59.000] And at last, I cried out, saying, “Now I am willing to do anything.” Then

[00:24:59.000 – 00:25:09.500] with no hope at all, I exclaimed, “And if there is a God, will He show Himself?” Then

[00:25:09.500 – 00:25:13.500] I was granted one of those sudden, strange experiences.

[00:25:13.500 – 00:25:20.100] It seemed to me that the whole room lit up with a great light.

[00:25:20.100 – 00:25:26.500] I was filled with an ecstasy that no man could describe.

[00:25:26.500 – 00:25:31.500] I suddenly realized that I was free.

[00:25:31.500 – 00:25:39.200] In the mind’s eye, it seemed as though I stood on a mountain, and a great clean wind was blowing.

[00:25:39.200 – 00:25:45.500] And I knew at once that it was not of air, but of spirit.

[00:25:45.500 – 00:25:50.600] At length, the ecstasy subsided.

[00:25:50.600 – 00:25:57.300] Of course, I am still on the bed, but now I lie in a new world.

[00:25:57.300 – 00:26:02.100] I felt at one with the universe.

[00:26:02.100 – 00:26:08.700] A great peace stole over me.

[00:26:08.700 – 00:26:16.500] And I thought to myself, “This is what the preachers have promised.

[00:26:16.500 – 00:26:26.400] This is the God of the preachers.” Oh, I lay there a long time in this wonderful state.

[00:26:26.400 – 00:26:30.900] Then my modern education got ahold of me.

[00:26:30.900 – 00:26:34.100] I began to be frightened.

[00:26:34.100 – 00:26:35.700] I panicked.

[00:26:35.700 – 00:26:40.800] I said, “Oh, this must be hallucination.

[00:26:40.800 – 00:26:43.600] Can this be real?

[00:26:43.600 – 00:26:48.300] I better call the doctor, have him examine me.

[00:26:48.300 – 00:26:58.300] He’s a good alienist.” So when he came, and at this moment, the destiny of our society hung by

[00:26:58.300 – 00:27:00.100] a very slender thread indeed.

[00:27:00.100 – 00:27:04.400] I told him what had happened as best I could.

[00:27:04.400 – 00:27:09.700] Most doctors would have said, “Well, Bill, just a little hallucination.

[00:27:09.700 – 00:27:20.800] It’ll soon pass off.” But no, this skeptical man of science, being a great human being, listened sympathetically, asked

[00:27:20.800 – 00:27:21.800] me a lot of questions.

[00:27:21.800 – 00:27:31.900] And finally, he said, “No, my boy,” he said, “you’re not crazy.” He said, “There has been some great

[00:27:31.900 – 00:27:33.400] psychic upheaval in you.

[00:27:33.400 – 00:27:35.200] Somehow you are different.

[00:27:35.200 – 00:27:36.800] I can’t put my finger on it.

[00:27:36.800 – 00:27:45.300] Maybe you had one of those conversion experiences that once in a blue moon sobers up alcoholics.

[00:27:45.300 – 00:27:48.400] But I think you have something, my boy.

[00:27:48.400 – 00:27:53.200] And whatever it is, you’d best hang on to it.

[00:27:53.200 – 00:28:01.400] It’s so much better than what had you only one hour ago.” So I’ve been hanging on ever since.

[00:28:01.400 – 00:28:10.600] There has been no relapse since that day, and so have a lot of other people.

[00:28:10.600 – 00:28:20.600] Now, you friends who come in here may say, “Do all of the members of Alcoholics Anonymous have an experience like this?” And my answer is, yes, they

[00:28:20.600 – 00:28:20.900] do.

[00:28:20.900 – 00:28:29.800] They all have an experience that enables them to do that which they couldn’t do before.

[00:28:29.800 – 00:28:34.400] In most cases, it comes on very, very slowly.

[00:28:34.400 – 00:28:44.800] What happened to me in six minutes happens to them in six weeks or six months or even years.

[00:28:44.800 – 00:28:55.700] But eventually, all of us become conscious of the presence of a greater power who can do for us

[00:28:55.700 – 00:28:56.800] what we cannot do alone.

[00:28:56.800 – 00:29:02.000] a common central realization.

[00:29:02.000 – 00:29:11.300] Well, such a realization, of course, called for decision, and I made the same decision that thousands of AAs have since made.

[00:29:11.300 – 00:29:21.400] The decision was I wanted to help other alcoholics find this release, this release which had come on these very simple terms, yet

[00:29:21.400 – 00:29:24.400] with such mysterious power.

[00:29:24.400 – 00:29:30.500] So I began working with alcoholics frantically, in the mission.

[00:29:30.500 – 00:29:35.800] This doctor, at risk to his reputation, let me come back and work in his projects.

[00:29:35.800 – 00:29:42.300] There wasn’t any results, though, for six months.

[00:29:42.300 – 00:29:48.800] When I told of my sudden experience, the alcoholics would just shake their heads and walk off.

[00:29:48.800 – 00:29:52.100] Couldn’t blame them, could you?

[00:29:52.100 – 00:29:56.900] In fact, the cynics still refer to that experience as Bill Wilson’s hot flash.

[00:29:56.900 – 00:30:03.100] Well, I feared that I had a little sense of divine appointment.

[00:30:03.100 – 00:30:09.600] I was trying to preach, and we yet lacked another element.

[00:30:09.600 – 00:30:16.900] So after a season of failure, my doctor, good old Dr.

[00:30:16.900 – 00:30:26.900] Silkworth, who passed away recently, said, “Bill, shouldn’t you emphasize the idea much more in this work that alcoholism is

[00:30:26.900 – 00:30:37.300] an illness, a fatal progressive illness?” And then it began to dawn upon me

[00:30:37.300 – 00:30:48.000] that that might open up these drunks to such an experience as I had had or to some enabling thing

[00:30:48.000 – 00:30:50.100] that would re-remove their obsession.

[00:30:50.100 – 00:31:00.200] In other words, if one drunk projected it upon another, that not only here is the release from alcoholism, but also that it

[00:31:00.200 – 00:31:06.300] is a fatal progressive disease, an obsession of the mind coupled to an allergy of the body.

[00:31:06.300 – 00:31:16.300] That message coming from one alcoholic to another might strike him deep and humble him enough so that the grace of God might expel his

[00:31:16.300 – 00:31:16.900] obsession.

[00:31:16.900 – 00:31:23.100] So I began to emphasize this idea of illness very much.

[00:31:23.100 – 00:31:33.800] At that juncture, my wife’s relatives begun, had begun to say, “Well, when is this guy going to go to work?” “When

[00:31:33.800 – 00:31:43.800] is he going to put the end of missionary?” “When’s he going to get a lower job at that damn department store?” Well, under such goading,

[00:31:43.800 – 00:31:55.600] I began to go over to Wall Street and sit around in brokerage houses, which made it look like I was employed.

[00:31:55.600 – 00:31:60.000] Sitting there one day, I fell into conversation with a stranger.

[00:31:60.000 – 00:32:03.900] Curiously enough, that led to a business deal.

[00:32:03.900 – 00:32:07.400] You see, my old business friends would have none of it.

[00:32:07.400 – 00:32:10.400] This business deal took me to Akron, Ohio.

[00:32:10.400 – 00:32:16.600] I had insinuated myself by accident into the middle of a big proxy fight.

[00:32:16.600 – 00:32:26.100] Suddenly, it looked as though I had a controlling interest in a situation which might have made me president of a little co-company out there.

[00:32:26.100 – 00:32:30.200] All elated now, I go out to Akron.

[00:32:30.200 – 00:32:37.400] I think, well, God is rewarding me for all this good work I’ve done, although not a single, one single drunk was sober yet.

[00:32:37.400 – 00:32:42.200] Arrived in Akron, the business deal fell through.

[00:32:42.200 – 00:32:44.900] The other side put more proxies on the table.

[00:32:44.900 – 00:32:54.800] My newfound friends disappeared in the direction of New York, left me in the Mayflower Ho-Hotel with a $10 bill in my pocket.

[00:32:54.800 – 00:33:02.600] And great waves of self-pity and anger swept over me.

[00:33:02.600 – 00:33:05.800] Suddenly, I realized that I was in danger of getting drunk.

[00:33:05.800 – 00:33:09.000] I began to pace.

[00:33:09.000 – 00:33:17.100] I began to walk up and down that lobby, looking in the bar room at one end and at the other end, absentmindedly, at a church directory.

[00:33:17.100 – 00:33:23.200] Well, as I remarked earlier, I don’t know what this AA would have done without friends.

[00:33:23.200 – 00:33:25.300] So I called up the clergy.

[00:33:25.300 – 00:33:30.300] I told him of my need to find another alcoholic to work with.

[00:33:30.300 – 00:33:36.100] I told him that I needed another alcoholic as much as that alcoholic could need me.

[00:33:36.100 – 00:33:40.000] Well, the clergyman was a little nine o’clock.

[00:33:40.000 – 00:33:43.400] His experience had been that one alcoholic at a time was enough.

[00:33:43.400 – 00:33:44.900] Why bring two of them together?

[00:33:44.900 – 00:33:53.100] Anyhow, he gave me a list of people I might inquire among in my search for an alcoholic.

[00:33:53.100 – 00:33:55.900] I began to call them on the telephone.

[00:33:55.900 – 00:34:02.200] They’d all see me in church Sunday, or they were going away for the weekend.

[00:34:02.200 – 00:34:04.200] But my need was urgent.

[00:34:04.200 – 00:34:12.200] But none were prepared to fill it, excepting the very last one on the list, a non-alcoholic.

[00:34:12.200 – 00:34:14.300] I called her.

[00:34:14.300 – 00:34:16.300] It was a famous name in Akron.

[00:34:16.300 – 00:34:17.400] I was very reluctant.

[00:34:17.400 – 00:34:24.900] I explained my need, and she said, “Yes, I know what you are talking about.

[00:34:24.900 – 00:34:33.900] I am not an alcoholic, but my life got in an awful jam, one I couldn’t get out of.

[00:34:33.900 – 00:34:37.600] I understand what you mean by spiritual awakening experience.

[00:34:37.600 – 00:34:48.300] You come straight out here.” So here came a non-alcoholic friend, one who cared about me, one who understood,

[00:34:48.300 – 00:34:50.200] one who would take time.

[00:34:50.200 – 00:34:52.700] And I told her my story.

[00:34:52.700 – 00:35:00.200] Straightaway she said, “There is a doctor here in this town, used to be on the staff of the City Hospital.

[00:35:00.200 – 00:35:07.300] Wonderful chap.” He’s lost his post.

[00:35:07.300 – 00:35:10.600] The bank, uh, the bank is about to foreclose his house.

[00:35:10.600 – 00:35:14.100] His wife is half an invalid from these years of drinking.

[00:35:14.100 – 00:35:15.900] Dr.

[00:35:15.900 – 00:35:19.400] Bob asks, “Should I call them up?

[00:35:19.400 – 00:35:27.200] I think I will.” So my new friend Henrietta goes to the phone, gets hold of dear Anne, Dr.

[00:35:27.200 – 00:35:35.800] Bob’s wife, says it’s a stranger from New York who thinks he has a cure for alcoholism.

[00:35:35.800 – 00:35:39.400] Well, Anne says, “This is very interesting, Henrietta, but Dr.

[00:35:39.400 – 00:35:40.800] Bob is just from home.

[00:35:40.800 – 00:35:42.800] It’s Mother’s Day.

[00:35:42.800 – 00:35:47.300] He had brought in a potted plant out of deference to me.

[00:35:47.300 – 00:35:49.800] The potted plant is on the table.

[00:35:49.800 – 00:35:54.000] But alas, Henrietta, he is so potted that he is on the floor.

[00:35:54.000 – 00:36:02.900] He can’t get here today.” Well, not a whit discouraged, my friend Henrietta said, “How about tomorrow?

[00:36:02.900 – 00:36:10.200] Let’s all have supper here.” So at 5:00 the next day, Dr.

[00:36:10.200 – 00:36:12.100] Bob and Anne entered that house.

[00:36:12.100 – 00:36:15.300] Henrietta put us off in the library.

[00:36:15.300 – 00:36:16.200] Dr.

[00:36:16.200 – 00:36:18.300] Bob said he could stay only five minutes.

[00:36:18.300 – 00:36:19.500] He was very shaky, you see.

[00:36:19.500 – 00:36:20.300] He needed a drink.

[00:36:20.300 – 00:36:23.200] We talked for five hours.

[00:36:23.200 – 00:36:33.300] And this time it was on a different basis because now I realized that I needed that man as much as he could possibly need

[00:36:33.300 – 00:36:33.800] me.

[00:36:33.800 – 00:36:42.600] And right then and there, we of AA think, the spark that was to become Alcoholics Anonymous was struck.

[00:36:42.600 – 00:36:52.100] For you see, my first friend later fell by the wayside and has not been picked up yet.

[00:36:52.100 – 00:36:59.500] Anne Smith then said to me, “Bill, uh, would you like to come and live with us for a few weeks?

[00:36:59.500 – 00:37:00.700] You could keep an eye on Dr.

[00:37:00.700 – 00:37:01.400] Bob.

[00:37:01.400 – 00:37:03.000] He could keep an eye on you.

[00:37:03.000 – 00:37:08.100] Maybe you could revive your business deal.” So I went to live with Dr.

[00:37:08.100 – 00:37:13.800] Bob and Anne in what, to many of us, is a really hallowed home.

[00:37:13.800 – 00:37:15.500] Presently, Dr.

[00:37:15.500 – 00:37:26.800] Bob said, “Well, Bill, if only in self-protection, don’t you think we’d better be doing some work with some drunks?” I said, “Yes.” So he called the City Hospital, got

[00:37:26.800 – 00:37:37.000] the receiving ward, spoke with a nurse there he knew, said that a friend was in from New York, thought

[00:37:37.000 – 00:37:38.600] he had a cure for alcoholism.

[00:37:38.600 – 00:37:49.800] At this juncture, the good doctor flushed deep red, for the nurse had said to him, “Well, Doctor, why don’t you try that on yourself?” Well,

[00:37:49.800 – 00:37:52.700] doctor said, uh, “Yes, but have you got a prospect down there?

[00:37:52.700 – 00:37:54.000] That’s a part of the process.

[00:37:54.000 – 00:38:02.300] We want to work on another alcoholic.” Said the nurse, “We have got a dandy.” “He just come in here.

[00:38:02.300 – 00:38:04.000] Used to be on the city council.

[00:38:04.000 – 00:38:06.100] Well-known lawyer around Akron.

[00:38:06.100 – 00:38:08.000] He’s gone all to pieces.

[00:38:08.000 – 00:38:13.100] He’s been in the City Hospital six times in the last four months.

[00:38:13.100 – 00:38:18.300] He can’t even get out of here and home without getting tight.

[00:38:18.300 – 00:38:23.000] I’m pretty sure he wants it stopped.

[00:38:23.000 – 00:38:24.800] He’s got the DTs right now.

[00:38:24.800 – 00:38:27.300] He’s whacked one of the nurses’ eyes.

[00:38:27.300 – 00:38:29.700] We got him loaded with paraldehyde and strapped down.

[00:38:29.700 – 00:38:35.700] How would that one do you, Doctor?” So says Dr.

[00:38:35.700 – 00:38:37.700] Bob, “Well, put him in a private room.

[00:38:37.700 – 00:38:41.700] We’ll be down as soon as he clears up.

[00:38:41.700 – 00:38:48.800] This is the medication you should give him.” A little later, Dr.

[00:38:48.800 – 00:38:59.200] Bob and I saw a sight which tens of thousands of us have since seen, and God willing, hundreds of thousands of us

[00:38:59.200 – 00:39:02.000] shall still see.

[00:39:02.000 – 00:39:04.200] It was the sight of the man on the bed.

[00:39:04.200 – 00:39:13.600] It was the sight of the man on the bed who does not yet know that he can get well.

[00:39:13.600 – 00:39:19.100] The man on the bed in this case was no optimist.

[00:39:19.100 – 00:39:26.700] He listened as we told our stories of drinking, of the simple precepts of our recovery, of our relief.

[00:39:26.700 – 00:39:34.200] And of course, we bore in him, in on him hard about alcoholism, the fatal illness.

[00:39:34.200 – 00:39:41.000] At length, the man on the bed shook his head and he said, “No, it’s too late for me.

[00:39:41.000 – 00:39:44.000] I don’t even dare go out of here.

[00:39:44.000 – 00:39:50.700] Oh, yes, you fellas have been through the mill, all right, but I guess you’re only in the wringer up to your knees.

[00:39:50.700 – 00:39:52.200] With me, it’s up to my neck.

[00:39:52.200 – 00:39:53.300] It’s too late.

[00:39:53.300 – 00:39:55.600] Don’t talk to me about religion either.

[00:39:55.600 – 00:39:58.200] I used to be a deacon in the church.

[00:39:58.200 – 00:40:07.400] Funny thing, you know, could be, I still got a kind of a faith in God, but I guess God hasn’t got any faith in me.

[00:40:07.400 – 00:40:09.300] I don’t know what’s the matter.

[00:40:09.300 – 00:40:19.300] I can’t stop.” “Well,” we said, “May we come back tomorrow?” “Oh, gosh,” he said, “This is a lonesome business.” He said, “I’d love to have you come back

[00:40:19.300 – 00:40:29.300] tomorrow.” So on the morrow we came, and the man’s wife sat at the foot of his

[00:40:29.300 – 00:40:29.600] bed.

[00:40:29.600 – 00:40:37.800] We heard her saying as we entered the room, “Why, husband, what has got into you?

[00:40:37.800 – 00:40:45.200] What makes you so different?” And seeing us in the door, he pointed and said, “Yes, they are the ones.

[00:40:45.200 – 00:40:55.300] They are the ones who understand.” And then in happy excitement, he told about the long hours

[00:40:55.300 – 00:40:56.400] of the night before.

[00:40:56.400 – 00:41:06.900] And when finally the thought had come, “Well, maybe if they have been granted relief from this thing, maybe

[00:41:06.900 – 00:41:11.400] I can have that gift, too.” And he began to have hope.

[00:41:11.400 – 00:41:22.400] And then as he became entirely willing to follow our simple precepts, he

[00:41:22.400 – 00:41:32.500] felt a singular sense of relief and freedom and confidence, which now

[00:41:32.500 – 00:41:41.200] had swelled into such a great tide that he said to his wife, “My dear, fetch me my clothes.

[00:41:41.200 – 00:41:51.400] We’re going to get up and get out.” So AA number three rose from his bed,

[00:41:51.400 – 00:41:55.300] walked out of that place, never to drink again.

[00:41:55.300 – 00:42:01.100] And that was in June 1935.

[00:42:01.100 – 00:42:08.100] Although we realized it not, the first AA group had, had begun.

[00:42:08.100 – 00:42:12.000] I stayed on for a few weeks more.

[00:42:12.000 – 00:42:20.200] The three of us worked with other alcoholics, mostly failures, but one or two did turn their faces to the light.

[00:42:20.200 – 00:42:30.300] Returning to New York in the fall of that year, now a little more chastened, a little more experienced, a group took shape there.

[00:42:30.300 – 00:42:38.500] Then came the must tell what we knew to the million who knew not.

[00:42:38.500 – 00:42:41.100] How were we to do that?

[00:42:41.100 – 00:42:48.000] It had taken us nearly three years to produce these recognitions.

[00:42:48.000 – 00:42:52.000] How were we to transmit this message?

[00:42:52.000 – 00:42:54.700] Could it crawl at snail’s pace?

[00:42:54.700 – 00:43:00.400] We realized that within gunshot of where we sat, people were dying like flies.

[00:43:00.400 – 00:43:07.400] People said there were a million alcoholics in America and three or four million more in the making.

[00:43:07.400 – 00:43:09.500] How could we let them know?

[00:43:09.500 – 00:43:13.400] Well, naturally, we thought in terms of hospitals.

[00:43:13.400 – 00:43:14.800] Hospitals didn’t want drunks.

[00:43:14.800 – 00:43:16.400] They never paid their bills.

[00:43:16.400 – 00:43:17.300] They never got well.

[00:43:17.300 – 00:43:18.600] You couldn’t blame the hospitals.

[00:43:18.600 – 00:43:22.400] So we thought, well, our society will have to have a string of hospitals.

[00:43:22.400 – 00:43:29.300] And then we thought, well, our older members will have to go to other localities to start groups.

[00:43:29.300 – 00:43:39.400] And surely we should have some kind of a book so that our experience can be put on paper, so that it won’t get garbled, so

[00:43:39.400 – 00:43:47.000] that those millions who don’t know can at least read about what happened to us.

[00:43:47.000 – 00:43:52.800] So that very evening, the Akron group met with Dr.

[00:43:52.800 – 00:44:03.100] Bob and me, and we took a decision, over the objections of some, that I was to go back to New York and raise money

[00:44:03.100 – 00:44:05.300] so that we might have a chain of hospitals.

[00:44:05.300 – 00:44:14.300] We might, uh, have members, older, experienced ones, to go to other cities, and so that we might have a book.

[00:44:14.300 – 00:44:19.200] One day I go to my brother-in-law with an imaginary ulcer attack.

[00:44:19.200 – 00:44:25.800] I’m grousing how stingy the very rich were when it came to drunk.

[00:44:25.800 – 00:44:32.200] He said, “Why don’t you talk to Shirley Wynn here in my office?” Former health commissioner.

[00:44:32.200 – 00:44:34.800] Shirley gave me a fine reception.

[00:44:34.800 – 00:44:40.500] He said, “Yes.” He said, “This will need a great deal of money.” I could see that.

[00:44:40.500 – 00:44:47.600] Next thing you know, uh, he says, “Why not the Rockefeller Foundation?” I shook my head.

[00:44:47.600 – 00:44:50.900] He said, “Oh, no.” He said, “The fellow for you to see is John D.

[00:44:50.900 – 00:44:53.900] Rockefeller person.” “Well,” I said, “Dr.

[00:44:53.900 – 00:44:59.300] Wynn, I don’t wish to be facetious, but could you not also give me an introduction to the Prince of Wales?

[00:44:59.300 – 00:45:04.300] He might be interested, too.” “No,” he said, “you should see John D.

[00:45:04.300 – 00:45:14.200] Rockefeller person.” Then here were– here was this thread of destiny, so thin, so tenuous.

[00:45:14.200 – 00:45:24.400] My brother-in-law stands there scratching his head, and he says, “When I was in high school, I knew a girl, and she had an uncle, probably an old man now.

[00:45:24.400 – 00:45:27.100] I think he’s a friend of the Rockefeller family.

[00:45:27.100 – 00:45:29.400] I don’t know that he’d remember me.

[00:45:29.400 – 00:45:30.300] Shall I call him up?”

[00:42:01.100 – 00:42:08.100] Although we realized it not, the first AA group had, had begun.

[00:42:08.100 – 00:42:12.000] I stayed on for a few weeks more.

[00:42:12.000 – 00:42:20.200] The three of us worked with other alcoholics, mostly failures, but one or two did turn their faces to the light.

[00:42:20.200 – 00:42:30.300] Returning to New York in the fall of that year, now a little more chastened, a little more experienced, a group took shape there.

[00:42:30.300 – 00:42:38.500] Then came the must tell what we knew to the million who knew not.

[00:42:38.500 – 00:42:41.100] How were we to do that?

[00:42:41.100 – 00:42:48.000] It had taken us nearly three years to produce these recognitions.

[00:42:48.000 – 00:42:52.000] How were we to transmit this message?

[00:42:52.000 – 00:42:54.700] Could it crawl at snail’s pace?

[00:42:54.700 – 00:43:00.400] We realized that within gunshot of where we sat, people were dying like flies.

[00:43:00.400 – 00:43:07.400] People said there were a million alcoholics in America and three or four million more in the making.

[00:43:07.400 – 00:43:09.500] How could we let them know?

[00:43:09.500 – 00:43:13.400] Well, naturally, we thought in terms of hospitals.

[00:43:13.400 – 00:43:14.800] Hospitals didn’t want drunks.

[00:43:14.800 – 00:43:16.400] They never paid their bills.

[00:43:16.400 – 00:43:17.300] They never got well.

[00:43:17.300 – 00:43:18.600] You couldn’t blame the hospitals.

[00:43:18.600 – 00:43:22.400] So we thought, well, our society will have to have a string of hospitals.

[00:43:22.400 – 00:43:29.300] And then we thought, well, our older members will have to go to other localities to start groups.

[00:43:29.300 – 00:43:39.400] And surely we should have some kind of a book so that our experience can be put on paper, so that it won’t get garbled, so

[00:43:39.400 – 00:43:47.000] that those millions who don’t know can at least read about what happened to us.

[00:43:47.000 – 00:43:52.800] So that very evening, the Akron group met with Dr.

[00:43:52.800 – 00:44:03.100] Bob and me, and we took a decision, over the objections of some, that I was to go back to New York and raise money

[00:44:03.100 – 00:44:05.300] so that we might have a chain of hospitals.

[00:44:05.300 – 00:44:14.300] We might, uh, have members, older, experienced ones, to go to other cities, and so that we might have a book.

[00:44:14.300 – 00:44:19.200] One day I go to my brother-in-law with an imaginary ulcer attack.

[00:44:19.200 – 00:44:25.800] I’m grousing how stingy the very rich were when it came to drunk.

[00:44:25.800 – 00:44:32.200] He said, “Why don’t you talk to Shirley Wynn here in my office?” Former health commissioner.

[00:44:32.200 – 00:44:34.800] Shirley gave me a fine reception.

[00:44:34.800 – 00:44:40.500] He said, “Yes.” He said, “This will need a great deal of money.” I could see that.

[00:44:40.500 – 00:44:47.600] Next thing you know, uh, he says, “Why not the Rockefeller Foundation?” I shook my head.

[00:44:47.600 – 00:44:50.900] He said, “Oh, no.” He said, “The fellow for you to see is John D.

[00:44:50.900 – 00:44:53.900] Rockefeller person.” “Well,” I said, “Dr.

[00:44:53.900 – 00:44:59.300] Wynn, I don’t wish to be facetious, but could you not also give me an introduction to the Prince of Wales?

[00:44:59.300 – 00:45:04.300] He might be interested, too.” “No,” he said, “you should see John D.

[00:45:04.300 – 00:45:14.200] Rockefeller person.” Then here were– here was this thread of destiny, so thin, so tenuous.

[00:45:14.200 – 00:45:24.400] My brother-in-law stands there scratching his head, and he says, “When I was in high school, I knew a girl, and she had an uncle, probably an old man now.

[00:45:24.400 – 00:45:27.100] I think he’s a friend of the Rockefeller family.

[00:45:27.100 – 00:45:29.400] I don’t know that he’d remember me.

[00:45:29.400 – 00:45:30.300] Shall I call him up?”

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