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Source: Stepping Stones Al-Anon Picnic – Service and Fellowship – June 8, 1968.mp3 File: stepping-stones-al-anon-picnic-service-and-fellowship-june-8-1968.mp3 Duration: 00:30:11
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Hi, Bill and Arbutus. Just a couple of words here. Today is June 8th, Saturday, and we just got back a couple of hours ago from Bill and Lois' up at Stepping Stones. It was the day of the Al-Anon picnic, and I took a PA system up there. It gave me a good chance to plug in a recorder, so I recorded the meeting, the whole meeting at the picnic. Some of it, I don't imagine, will mean much to you, but Arbutus, you'll remember, I'm sure, some of them, Margaret D. and Wanda R. and, of course, Lois and Bill, and Bill gave one of his off-the-cuff talks that, as usual, just hit the spot.
So I thought I'd put the whole thing on this tape and let you listen to it, and maybe in your mind's eye you could be there with us eating some fried chicken and enjoying the day. It was another beautiful day, of course. It's a classic that it never rains on Lois' picnic, and it hasn't in all these years, and it ran true to form. It was just a wonderful day again, and I'm all charged up, I guess, tonight, but I'm still trying to finish this tape, and with any luck and God's help, I may be able to get it off to you by Monday. So long for now.
Now, before the meeting starts, well, they come up and get them now, so we don't have to interrupt the meeting by dashing up to get something to drink. And then I thought maybe the youngsters that wanted to play could find a place either in the front of the house or over in the field, so that we wouldn't have the disturbance of the meeting of youngsters yelling and having a good time. It's wonderful to know they're having a good time, but not while we're trying to carry on a meeting.
So, in about two minutes, we'll get settled. If everybody will either bring their chairs up, or if they can hear all right from where they are. Can you hear way back over there? Margaret wants to know if Jack can hear. No, he can't. Okay. Now, will the youngsters either sit down quietly here and stay quiet during the meeting, or else go out into the field where they can play and run and have a good time if they want it.
Michael! Michael, come on! Now, don't move it anywhere. You can't keep them moving them all the time when they come up. It's a heavy base. It won't hold. Okay. Now, can you all hear? I want it to be nice and quiet, because Adele, who is the… I'm not sure whether she's the present chairman of the intergroup. I know she was last year, whether she still is, I can't say. But she's going to tell you a little bit about intergroup. And, of course, it's the intergroup that puts on this picnic each year. So, if you'll all be nice and quiet so you can hear Adele. This is Adele H. of the New York intergroup.
Thank you. Thank you. I need that vote of confidence. I didn't expect to be called first. I'm kind of trembling a little bit. Do you hear me, though? Do you hear me back there? Thank you. Thank you. I see so many new faces that a little explanation of Al-Anon Intergroup's work would probably be in order. Our work is very similar to AA Intergroup. We get all the distress calls.
[00:05:19]
We have a 24-hour answering service. It's a tape, and records the names, telephone numbers, or addresses that people are willing to give us. We call these people back, and they are then contacted by group contacts in the neighborhood in which they live, and that's their entry into Al-Anon, if they so choose to do it. We also send them free literature about Al-Anon and its work. We have a regular office at 200 Park Avenue South, which borders Union Square on 17th Street. We have a part-time paid worker, and the rest of the work is done by volunteers, of which we need many, and if anybody here would like to volunteer some time, I'll be glad to take their name and address later.
Besides the distress calls, which we handle there, we get lots of correspondence from interested agencies or individuals, which we answer, and there, too, we send free literature about Al-Anon. We publish a monthly newspaper called The Reporter. We also publish a meeting list of all the meetings held in the New York metropolitan area, going up into Westchester and out on the island. I made a few notes over here. I knew I'd probably find a blank spot somewhere. I did want to mention to the Al-Anon members here to please not forget the exchange meeting and the delegates meeting, which we're having at the George Washington Hotel, Lexington Avenue and 23rd Street.
It starts at 7.30 this Tuesday. The 7.30 meeting is the exchange meeting, and the 8.30 meeting is the delegates meeting. We usually have it together to save people the bother of coming into the city more than once. At the exchange meeting, those of you who are not familiar with it, we book meetings with other Al-Anon groups for the next six months. It's customary in Al-Anon, the same as in AA, that we have meetings coming in and meetings going out.
We usually do this on a basis of once a month, but it can be done more frequently, of course, whichever you feel your group would like. We go out and speak at other groups, and we like to have people come in and visit us and speak for us. Since there are some people here who aren't always available, and since some of you are not familiar with them, there are always the old diehards who do a lot of work for Al-Anon, and I would like to just introduce them.
Like Johanna here, who does all our kitchen work whenever we have a workshop or a dance or anything like that to raise money for Intergroup. We have other people here whom I won't introduce because I know that headquarters is going to introduce them later, such as our literature committee and people who help write our literature for Al-Anon. I did want to introduce Sue L., who was a former chairman. Sue, can you stand up, Sue? There she is. Sue started the Jackson Heights group many, many years ago, was also a former chairman of Al-Anon Intergroup, and is still working very, very hard for Al-Anon in general at headquarters and so forth.
I happen to be current chairman, but my term of office is over at the end of this month, June. This is the second time I've been chairman in Intergroup, and it's a marvelous privilege to be associated with an organization that does so much good work. The ex-officios are very fortunate in that they can return each month to the board of director meetings and act as a guidance committee. They don't have a vote, but I think this is a wonderful thing for any organization to have, people who have the experience to sit by and act as one of the guidelines for the development of Al-Anon.
[00:10:02]
The young people are simply marvelous. I think that it's only when you can sit on the board of directors, and by the way, we always want new names for board of directors, so come to the delegates meetings and introduce people who are interested in Al-Anon and get them on the board. But what I wanted to say is that when you're working on the board of directors for Al-Anon Intergroup, or like the executive committees for headquarters, you're really getting down into the meat of the program. You're helping Al-Anon in many, many ways. Your devotion is very, very much appreciated, and once you've gotten your feet wet, as Bill says, you always want to come back for more.
It's a marvelous work, and it's just so thrilling, I hope I never have to give it up. Since this is the end of my term of office, I thought that I would introduce Margaret, who's going to be our next chairman, and who is greatly involved in the Alateen work. She always speaks so enthusiastically about Alateen, and she is really one of our greatest enthusiasts in the Alateen program, and perhaps if I missed anything, she can fill you in. Margaret?
Thank you, Adele. I hope I can do half as well as my predecessors have done in the past. I'm not going to say much, but we are having our seventh, I believe, Alateen conference, the 21st to the 23rd of June, which is two weeks away, just about, and if any of the Alateens wish to go, they have to have a $5.00 reservation in by the 10th, which is Monday. All I can say is it's just marvelous working with these children. I get as much help, or more help, I believe, sitting watching and listening to them, and seeing their growth, and I get more than I'm giving.
It's very rewarding, because you see them coming in with such long dreaded faces, and then after they're in three or four months, you see a flower has bloomed, and they really come out. It's really marvelous work. I think that's about all I can say, and we do need volunteers for Intergroup, and please come and help us. Thank you. Thank you, Adele, so much, and thank you, Margaret. It was very interesting to hear you tell a little bit about Alateen. I kind of wish you told us a little bit more about Alateen, about the general setup.
Do you want to come back and just tell a little bit more? I see you haven't sat down yet. I'll get you back. About what Alateen is, and so forth. Thanks, Lois. Alateens are for the disturbed children that have an alcoholic problem in the home, and we come and whatever is bothering the children, they come and discuss it, and of course it's anonymous. Whatever is said is left in the room, and I think maybe the best way of doing this would, if possible, let one of the Alateens tell how Alateen has helped them.
Hugh John, would you come up? Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Well, I'm an Alateen. My name is Hugh, and I'm 14 years old, and I'm an Old Flatbush. Alateen is mainly for children who have problems because of their alcoholic parent, and they want to have help from their problems, so they come to Alateen for this help. And this is where they usually find it, and when you go to Alateen, as soon as you come, you're accepted right away, you know, and when you're in Alateen, you start to talk and open up, and all your problems are released, and then you have a chance to help other people with their problems, and it gives you a lot of self-satisfaction.
And, uh, you have to, when you go into Alateen, you have to realize that you can't change the alcoholic, that you're the one who's going to have to change, and you have to know that it's a disease, the alcoholism. And the only way that you could help him, or whoever's drinking in your family, is by you changing, and Alateen is just great, and, you know, if any of you have any children that you think have problems, definitely send them to Alateen, because Alateen really helps them, and they get a much better personality and everything. That's all I have to say.
[00:15:27]
Well, that was wonderful, Hugh. Thank you very much. It was very clear and explicit, and I think we all know so much more now, after your explanation. Now, maybe Wanda will come up. Wanda's the chairman of our Board of Trustees of the Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters. Wanda. Hi, everybody. Well, I just want to tell you what can happen to you if you're a volunteer. Sixteen years ago, well, I could say today, but about this time in June, I came to a picnic here at Lois' and Bill's, and I ended up being chairman of the Board of Trustees.
However, it's been such a rewarding experience, and I think it's done a great deal for me, and I just want to take these few minutes of time to tell you that it could happen to you, too. Don't give it a second thought, because if you do, you'll try to find excuses to not do it, but I think you would find it to your benefit. There are many ways that we can do 12-step work. Some of us have the opportunity to do it with new people that come into our groups. Other people have their own family responsibilities, and they cannot get into intergroup or to headquarters to do volunteer work.
However, there are many of you, I'm sure, that have some talent and some time that you could devote to helping the families of other alcoholics and to helping yourself, and I'd just like to say today that I recommend this to all of you that could do it, and please try to find a way to do it. Thank you. Thank you, Wanda, very much. Margaret, will you say a few words about the forum, please? Margaret is the editor of our family group forum.
I'm glad none of you have those little gadgets that you can turn off, because this is going to be a commercial for the forum. As you know, it's now enlarged so that it's really the content of it is two and a half times what it's ever been, and it naturally is more expensive. But I think more people are writing to it, therefore, I think it's better than it's ever been. And I always want more people to write, because that's the only way that it's ever going to keep getting better, is as more people send in their own points of view.
I've got a couple of gold stars on my list of contributors. One of them is here now. I was talking to her earlier, and I was so glad to see her looking well, because this winter she had a particularly virulent flu, and she couldn't even have neighbors come in. She and her husband were both so sick that their neighbors would leave food at their door, and after they'd gone, Esther would take it in. But do you know how Esther spent her convalescence? She got out all of her old Al-Anon material that she had been collecting for years, and since she couldn't go to her own meeting, and she knew that she wouldn't be able to go for perhaps another month or two, she set herself to sum up what Al-Anon had meant to her, and what she had found most helpful in it. And I think that I've forgotten now which issue it was in, but I think you'll agree that she's got an awful lot out of this Al-Anon.
And I wouldn't wish flu on any of you to stimulate you to send something to the forum, but after all, there are odd moments in your life when you could sit down and write something, and I'd love to have it.
[00:20:13]
We now have a forum board, so that I think that we can expect the forum to be three times or four times, maybe five times, because I think eventually there will be five anyhow of us on it, all contributing new ideas, new approaches, and sort of clearing out rubbish if there is any in it. It won't ever just be one person's idea, which of course nothing in Al-Anon ever is one person's idea, but it has been almost that over the years. But now we've got these new people that are full of good ideas, and I think that you can expect it to be better.
So that I wish that whoever gets your forum copy, the free forum copy that is sent to a group, doesn't leave it at home, but brings it to every meeting and passes it around and suggests that each member there has her own copy that she can take home with her and keep. Because there are people that have kept it for 15 years, and they're still getting ideas out of those old forums. So that, of course, my personal goal is one forum for every Al-Anon member. And I can't possibly subscribe for all of you, but each one of you might do it for yourself. Thank you.
Thank you, Margaret, very much. I'm sure we'll all start taking out a new subscription to the forum. Joe, will you tell us a little bit about institutions? Joe is the chairman of our committee on institutions at Headquarters. Joe? A few years ago, I didn't know, I thought, institutions. And just as an Al-Anon member said to me, oh, about two months ago, what is that institutional thing? That's just how I felt. I feel entirely differently now.
We at World Service, you might say, do 12-step work on a worldwide basis. There are Al-Anon groups in institutions throughout the world. In Japan, in South America, a new group was just formed in Denmark. You're probably wondering, why is this so necessary? Although the American Medical Association and world authorities have recognized alcoholism as a disease, too few until recently recognized it as a family disease.
Dr. Milton Maxwell has said, no large health problem has ever been solved by treating just the victim. The family plays a vital role in the rehabilitation of the alcoholic, particularly when he is released from either a rehabilitation center, a mental hospital, or a penal institution. Recently, an Al-Anon group was formed at Freeport Hospital. They are very successful. The spouses of the alcoholics are invited.
There is a panel of three people. The one person briefs these people on Al-Anon and what it has done, what it is, what it stands for. The second speaker gives just a brief resume of what she was like before Al-Anon and her growth since Al-Anon.
[00:25:04]
And the third refers the people who are there to an Al-Anon meeting. We are growing very, very rapidly, and this has come about through the wonderful cooperation of AA. AA General Service addresses the envelopes of the AA institutional groups. We insert our letter, mail it, and the tremendous response from these letters are unbelievable. Of the inmates and patients who are completely in despair because their families no longer want to have anything to do with them.
They write to them and tell them they have no home to come to. Then, through the grace of God, they hear about Al-Anon. We send them an encouraging warm letter, a brief one, and we receive many letters telling us how grateful they are for Al-Anon. How their family has become reunited and their marriage is on a much firmer foundation. This is one of the most interesting ways for Al-Anon members to perform a service in Al-Anon.
The rewards are beyond measure. Thank you. Thank you, Jo. That was very inspiring. Now Alice will say a few words to you. Alice is our Chairman of Literature. And she's done a tremendous amount of work getting out the book Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism. The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage and the Rewrite of Living with an Alcoholic. And all the pamphlet literature. And now she'll tell you about something new that's on the books. Alice?
I think it was mean to make me follow Jo, because I'm so inadequate. Anyway, we have a new book coming out. The name of it is Odat, which means One Day at a Time in Al-Anon. And I hate hearing anybody say, is it like the 24 hour book, because it isn't. The only thing it has in common with it is that it's a daily reading thing. But this one is Al-Anon. And we hope to have it out by September. The whole thing, for better or worse, is in the printer's hands now.
And we've been working on it for a long time and are very hopeful that everybody will like it. I think that's all. Thank you. Alice didn't tell you that these are all inspirational readings and they're really terrific. And I think you're all going to just be on tiptoes until it comes out. Then want to get one, of course. Bill will say a few words, but I think I'll put in my two cents worth right now.
Because he always leaves on a high inspirational note, where mine's going to be very mundane. And that is, we have two garbage cans over here. Will you kindly put anything that you don't want to take home with you in the cans? And if they get full, maybe we'll have to get another one. Or maybe you could use the, pour out the ice maybe, we'll pour out the ice and we can use those. Because there aren't any more bottles in those.
And then I'd appreciate it tremendously if you would stack the chairs. If you'd put them over right near the little entrance that comes from the driveway, right here. If you'd stack them up for me, that's all the, well I call them undertaker's chairs. Not the lawn chairs. The lawn chairs, you know, the aluminum ones.
[00:30:00]
So, and I thank you all for coming, and I hope we'll see you all next year. And God bless you all.